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Stay at home mums have the hardest job and here's why. Watch

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    (Original post by Tyrion_Lannister)
    I did, but I didn't get what you meant But I do agree it's offensive to state working women don't care about their kids, I just have sympathy with red one because when I've mentioned it on here, I've been attacked, as have others, so it gets annoying
    People get too emotionally involved in **** like this, hence people claiming "but mummy loved me moar" and what ever other BS is among these pages. How people raise their kids is up to them, I don't think you can really rule that stay at home or none stay at home mum results in dysfunctional children in either case, plenty of folks have stay at home mums, plenty (I'd assume the majority) don't. You get weirdos/psychopaths from both, you get perfectly functional lovely people from both.

    Too much drama in this thread, though just to cause you abject rage before I peruse other threads, I will disagree with the original premise of the thread and state I do not believe it is the hardest job in the world bar some extreme examples, though you could likely counter with another extreme line of employment.


    ...also my cat turned on my printer AGAIN...what does it want to print?
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    Yeah, but could she hoover the living room on a rainy Tuesday night in Stoke?
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    (Original post by Red one)
    Does it have anything to do with you being a hypocrite? If you're going to be holier than thou at least have the decency not to display a flagrant double standard in your ostensible self-serving righteousness. You know what's funny Lucaf said the same thing in a more implicit manner yet you haven't quoted him why is that?
    More that other peoples replies had been responded to be you or Tyrion, yours seemed to sail by.

    I didn't quote them because I exist to cause you to seethe with rage and hammer on your keyboard while grinding your teeth.

    ...nah I just missed their post, apologies if it was along the same lines and I didn't pick up on it, I just tried searching for any members with usernames that begin with Lucaf, nothing, but I'll have a look see and totally be all holy and thou and stuff against it.

    Erm did you mean this?

    "I do actually agree quite strongly with this. If one partner earns enough to comfortably support a family, there is no NEED for the other partner to work. If they do decide to work they are trading time with the kids for more money, which while not necessarily a bad thing I can sympathise with parents who are loathe to do that."

    Because...that's much less of a personal attack than your post, totally different league.
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    (Original post by Tyrion_Lannister)
    Running a house is a job. And spending time with your kids, taking them places, supporting them.

    I'd have been very upset if my mum worked full time in my teens. I'm 19 nearly 20 now
    Running a house is something you have to do whether or not you already have a job. As somebody else said, once the kids are in school that is six or seven hours a day for cleaning, shopping etcetera... Which are things you would still need to do if you have a job. As for spending time with your kids, again if they are already out of the house at school there is only a big difference on holidays, and once the kids can entertain themselves it is not even that necessary.

    In the end different families make it work in different ways. My mum went full time as soon as my brothers and I were all in school, but she was a teacher so that meant she was only working when we were already out. Other parents might not work such convenient hours so I can understand why they might decide to stay at home or work part time. I just whole heartedly disagree that being a stay at home parent for teenagers who are out of the house most of the day, able to sort themselves out when they are home and help with the housework themselves is in any way comparable in difficulty than an actual job, let alone that it is the hardest one. I am not judging stay at home parents, and there should be no obligation for both parents to work if one can support the family alone, but that doesn't make it difficult.
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    (Original post by Red one)
    I only made this thread since most people on this forum, as Tyrion Lannister mentioned earlier, are career oriented which is expected from a student forum however that doesn't allow you to dismiss stay-at-home mums as "scroungers" when there's a mutual spousal understanding in place.
    When did I dismiss them as scroungers?

    Silly girl.
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    (Original post by joey11223)

    "I do actually agree quite strongly with this. If one partner earns enough to comfortably support a family, there is no NEED for the other partner to work. If they do decide to work they are trading time with the kids for more money, which while not necessarily a bad thing I can sympathise with parents who are loathe to do that."

    Because...that's much less of a personal attack than your post, totally different league.
    Yes it's this post and I actually bolded the part which I thought was more offensive than my own post which you found harsh. Telling someone that they're trading time they could care and love their kids for $$$$ and the bottom line is not harsh?
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    (Original post by joey11223)
    People get too emotionally involved in **** like this, hence people claiming "but mummy loved me moar" and what ever other BS is among these pages. How people raise their kids is up to them, I don't think you can really rule that stay at home or none stay at home mum results in dysfunctional children in either case, plenty of folks have stay at home mums, plenty (I'd assume the majority) don't. You get weirdos/psychopaths from both, you get perfectly functional lovely people from both.

    Too much drama in this thread, though just to cause you abject rage before I peruse other threads, I will disagree with the original premise of the thread and state I do not believe it is the hardest job in the world bar some extreme examples, though you could likely counter with another extreme line of employment.


    ...also my cat turned on my printer AGAIN...what does it want to print?
    I agree, my issue was with a person who claims to be a feminist but has massive problems with women choosing to be traditionally feminine. People like her give feminism a bad name

    :rofl:
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    (Original post by Tyrion_Lannister)
    Running a house is a job. And spending time with your kids, taking them places, supporting them.

    I'd have been very upset if my mum worked full time in my teens. I'm 19 nearly 20 now
    That is you. As an African child, I can happily say I am happy my mum works. Only Africans/Asians understand the struggle of being called from upstairs to bring the remote that is on the table opposite them. I need a break. Not everyone wants to be suffocated by their mummy
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    (Original post by lucaf)
    Running a house is something you have to do whether or not you already have a job. As somebody else said, once the kids are in school that is six or seven hours a day for cleaning, shopping etcetera... Which are things you would still need to do if you have a job. As for spending time with your kids, again if they are already out of the house at school there is only a big difference on holidays, and once the kids can entertain themselves it is not even that necessary.
    But you can do it better if you have time. It's like saying someone finishing work at 10pm and someone finishing at 6pm both need to eat. They do, but the person coming in at 6 could make a much better, nicer meal than the person coming in at 10

    I mentioned this on another thread
    school finishes at 3, full time work finishes later. You can have that time.
    When your child is a teenager, with free periods in GCSE and 6th form, you can do stuff with them then
    Again I disagree. I've always done stuff with my mum, still do. I can't stand people who "leave kids to entertain themselves"

    In the end different families make it work in different ways. My mum went full time as soon as my brothers and I were all in school, but she was a teacher so that meant she was only working when we were already out. Other parents might not work such convenient hours so I can understand why they might decide to stay at home or work part time. I just whole heartedly disagree that being a stay at home parent for teenagers who are out of the house most of the day, able to sort themselves out when they are home and help with the housework themselves is in any way comparable in difficulty than an actual job, let alone that it is the hardest one. I am not judging stay at home parents, and there should be no obligation for both parents to work if one can support the family alone, but that doesn't make it difficult.
    I think it depends on the family and the circumstance. Someone could have a really easy child, someone else could have a difficult one. You can't really say
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    (Original post by Red one)
    Yes it's this post and I actually bolded the part which I thought was more offensive than my own post which you found harsh. Telling someone that they're trading time they could care and love their kids for $$$$ and the bottom line is not harsh?
    More that he balances it saying it's not necessarily a bad thing, I assume his point being that depending on financial circumstances although not ideal, it may be in the better interests of the family to "trade" what could be time spent with kids to bring more money into the family budget. Also your post seemed a little more personal in its approach and seemed to push the parent must chose work for themselves, not that they feel they provide better for their children by bringing in more money/creating more opportunities. That said, I missed where you said earning more money isn't necessarily wrong, so apologies for that.

    Anyhow too much heat on this thread, despite my jumping in post I don't like confrontation very much, I think it struck a nerve or something, makes me think voices are raised even though its in text on a forum haha, arguments IRL make me cry cos I'm beta, so I'm gonna go find a thread about unicorns or something.
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    (Original post by ennahaspatience)
    That is you. As an African child, I can happily say I am happy my mum works. Only Africans/Asians understand the struggle of being called from upstairs to bring the remote that is on the table opposite them. I need a break. Not everyone wants to be suffocated by their mummy
    What?

    You'll open a can of worms with me on this one, but I'd argue that if you can't say no and your parents are too lazy to get it themselves, that's your problem.

    And it's not being suffocated having parents that spend time with you
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    (Original post by Red one)
    Many of you ridiculed me for a recent thread I made where I mentioned that being a housewife and full time mum was hard.

    Here's a video to prove it.

    What about a househusband

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    (Original post by Tyrion_Lannister)
    I agree, my issue was with a person who claims to be a feminist but has massive problems with women choosing to be traditionally feminine. People like her give feminism a bad name

    :rofl:
    I suppose she's probably a bit extreme or old fashioned, in that originally I suppose the push was away from staying at home and trying to force equality in male dominated worlds (offices and such), so those among them who liked to stay at home and be a housewife would be looked upon with scorn. Though the point now is the choice is here, a woman can chose a career or to stay at home and there's not that much in the way of boundaries realistically.
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    (Original post by Red one)
    Yes it's this post and I actually bolded the part which I thought was more offensive than my own post which you found harsh. Telling someone that they're trading time they could care and love their kids for $$$$ and the bottom line is not harsh?
    I said it was not necessarily a bad thing, and I said time not love or affection. If a parent decides to spend a little less time with their kids in exchange for the means to make the kids lives a little more comfortable, I see no problem in that. After all, that is what you expect your husband to do, would that mean he loves the kids less because he spends less time with them?

    People should do what works for them. The kids could have their mum waiting at home when they get back from school, or they could have to wait a couple of hours but afford to go to Disneyland that summer. You can care for your family in different ways.
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    (Original post by joey11223)
    More that he balances it saying it's not necessarily a bad thing, I assume his point being that depending on financial circumstances although not ideal, it may be in the better interests of the family to "trade" what could be time spent with kids to bring more money into the family budget. Also your post seemed a little more personal in its approach and seemed to push the parent must chose work for themselves, not that they feel they provide better for their children by bringing in more money/creating more opportunities. That said, I missed where you said earning more money isn't necessarily wrong, so apologies for that.

    Anyhow too much heat on this thread, despite my jumping in post I don't like confrontation very much, I think it struck a nerve or something, makes me think voices are raised even though its in text on a forum haha, arguments IRL make me cry cos I'm beta, so I'm gonna go find a thread about unicorns or something.
    I'm sure if your mum was at stay-at-home things would've been different.

    Spoiler:
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    I'm joking.
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    (Original post by joey11223)
    I suppose she's probably a bit extreme or old fashioned, in that originally I suppose the push was away from staying at home and trying to force equality in male dominated worlds (offices and such), so those among them who liked to stay at home and be a housewife would be looked upon with scorn. Though the point now is the choice is here, a woman can chose a career or to stay at home and there's not that much in the way of boundaries realistically.
    Yeah I support choice. I don't agree with pushing equality, I agree with allowing people to choose what they want. If 100% of women chose not to work, that would be fine. But the minute 1% of women are forced not to work because 99% don't want to, I have a problem
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    (Original post by Red one)
    I'm sure if your mum was at stay-at-home things would've been different.

    Spoiler:
    Show
    I'm joking.
    Technically she was for the first few years as their was little choice. . Also once at school she start an hour earlier and I think have a shorter break or just ask to be paid 30 mins less so she could pick me up from a friends house not long after school finished (friends kids went to same school).

    But as a dundundun, single parent, she had little choice, though these days she could have probably just been a drain on the state quite easily. I am thankful she didn't chose that option, as it sets a better life lesson IMO.

    I blame her nature, she is too soft, thus I am too soft as she was my only adult influence. I have never had a blazing row with my partner, but when we eventually move in together and if we do, I will start crying and want a cuddle. But...you know my tears will be heavily concentrated with manly testosterone..:cool:
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    (Original post by Tyrion_Lannister)
    Yeah I support choice. I don't agree with pushing equality, I agree with allowing people to choose what they want. If 100% of women chose not to work, that would be fine.
    Only issue there is what if some husbands would like to stay with the kids? Should there be a lean towards allowing women the choice over men?

    ...and this is a totally off-topic discussion now.
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    (Original post by Tyrion_Lannister)
    What?

    You'll open a can of worms with me on this one, but I'd argue that if you can't say no and your parents are too lazy to get it themselves, that's your problem.

    And it's not being suffocated having parents that spend time with you



    Did you read the part when I said I was African, with African parents? The stereotypes are true.

    By suffocated, I mean that I don't want my mum to be at home all time, when she started working full time, sure I was quite upset for a while, because i missed her and the fact that works with hard criminals. But I now enjoy the benefits and prefer that she works full time, I can spend time with her when she is not working. You are first person I have heard of to spend their free periods with their mum. Everyday, our family spend hours talking, she always makes time for us. :confused:
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    (Original post by Tyrion_Lannister)
    But you can do it better if you have time. It's like saying someone finishing work at 10pm and someone finishing at 6pm both need to eat. They do, but the person coming in at 6 could make a much better, nicer meal than the person coming in at 10

    I mentioned this on another thread
    school finishes at 3, full time work finishes later. You can have that time.
    When your child is a teenager, with free periods in GCSE and 6th form, you can do stuff with them then
    Again I disagree. I've always done stuff with my mum, still do. I can't stand people who "leave kids to entertain themselves"


    I think it depends on the family and the circumstance. Someone could have a really easy child, someone else could have a difficult one. You can't really say
    Yeah I suppose, it is about striking a balance that works for you. Although don't forget a lot of kids like being left to entertain themselves. I love the hell out of my parents, but there are very few activities I actually do with them. And that couple of hours after school was always homework time for me, whether or not my parents were in. Family time started later
 
 
 
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