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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Me, my girlfriend and a few friends went out the other night. I picked my girlfriends dress, she tried them on I picked the one I liked the most. Half way through the night she changed into a more revealing dress for no reason. During the night she got complements from other boys and it really upset me that I went home (I get really anxious aswell and uncomfortable in situations easily). My GF said that it was nothing to worry about, she said sorry for changing dresses from the one I picked and we moved on.

    This weekend were going out again and she wants to wear the same dress. I don't know how I feel about this.

    Should I be upset that she wants to wear a dress that upset me so much when other people were looking and commenting? I'm not the person to say you can't wear this or that, so I'm in a bit of a situation here.

    Any positive constructive comments welcome.
    Thank you.
    Why are you picking out her dresses for her? She is her own person and if she wants to wear something revealing then let her do that! It doesn't automatically mean that she is going out to have other men's attention or if she's looking to get rid of you, she may just want to make herself feel good!
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    (Original post by ImNotReallyMe)
    You are being controlling when you feel upset that someone made an individual choice that was contrary to your own expectations.

    There is a story of a girl who loved her rabbit so much she squeezed it to death. When you attempt to control a person according to your standards, you are not loving and respecting them.

    She also apologised? I see nothing to apologise for

    This can develop into a dysfunctional relationship if you don't work on your control factor and insecurity. You're insecure because other men compliment her and now you feel challenged and this is a neurotic tendency.

    If she wasn't responding to the compliments, then your relationship is fine... If she was and she cheated on you, then you leave her, simple as. No trust = no relationship
    yes bby! this is everything right! LET WOMEN BE WOMEN
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    (Original post by katherine9609)
    If she wants to dress in any way then she can. If you have such a view on women that the moment they get a boyfriend they have to cover up then that's your problem not the girls

    Most females dress for THEMSELVES not for men. What makes you think that we dress for men, to show off and for compliments lol

    Not to mention, everyone has a different view on what's revealing clothing and what isn't so as far as we know, the guy could be throwing a fit over a vest top and shorts when they go out for shopping and not just her wearing a dress for a night out.

    In all honesty, it's the guy who's letting his insecurities strain their relationship. If she doesn't see a problem, if she isn't reacting to those men (who lets remember, have the right to compliment her whether she has a bf or not) then the guy shouldn't be worrying because she's with him and not all these other guys


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    I don't have such a view of women. I have such a view of people in relationships.

    I don't show off when I'm in a relationship, even if the clothes don't look great on me, unless my SO specifically says it would be nice or the occasion calls for it. Even on the beach I keep myself covered, to make sure she's comfortable.
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    (Original post by donutellme)
    I don't have such a view of women. I have such a view of people in relationships.

    I don't show off when I'm in a relationship, even if the clothes don't look great on me, unless my SO specifically says it would be nice or the occasion calls for it. Even on the beach I keep myself covered, to make sure she's comfortable.
    Then that's ridiculous & basically allowing the "significant other" to control you. Never should you be controlled or feel like you have to eg. Cover up to satisfy your partner. That's not right and never will be right
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    why would you choose what she wears? very controlling
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    pics
    Beat me to it.
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    (Original post by katherine9609)
    Then that's ridiculous & basically allowing the "significant other" to control you. Never should you be controlled or feel like you have to eg. Cover up to satisfy your partner. That's not right and never will be right
    What do you think a relationship is about?... so naive.
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    (Original post by donutellme)
    What do you think a relationship is about?... so naive.
    Most certainly not about being controlled and having a 3rd parent. The only naive person here is you because you think being controlled by your significant other is okay when in fact it's not under any circumstances. If you feel the need to do something you normally wouldn't in order to satisfy your partner then you shouldn't be with them
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    PLOT TWIST: I was one of the guys that complimented her.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    He's the insecure one yet she needs some compliments from other males to feel good lmaoooooo
    Yeah but even people who aren't insecure are boosted by compliments
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    (Original post by katherine9609)
    Most certainly not about being controlled and having a 3rd parent. The only naive person here is you because you think being controlled by your significant other is okay when in fact it's not under any circumstances. If you feel the need to do something you normally wouldn't in order to satisfy your partner then you shouldn't be with them
    Yeah but it's not being controlled though. Is the fact that you'd stop flirting with others once you're in a relationship being controlled? Or perhaps you wouldn't...
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    (Original post by donutellme)
    Yeah but it's not being controlled though. Is the fact that you'd stop flirting with others once you're in a relationship being controlled? Or perhaps you wouldn't...
    Lol wait what? Flirting? Pretty sure no one has mentioned flirting. The girl mentioned by the guy (from what he said) wasn't flirting. If you cannot see a difference between receiving compliments and flirting then you need to completely rethink your mind set


    Edit: and yes, not being allowed to dress how you want just because your partner says so is controlling and wrong
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    (Original post by katherine9609)
    Lol wait what? Flirting? Pretty sure no one has mentioned flirting. The girl mentioned by the guy (from what he said) wasn't flirting. If you cannot see a difference between receiving compliments and flirting then you need to completely rethink your mind set


    Edit: and yes, not being allowed to dress how you want just because your partner says so is controlling and wrong
    Suit yourself
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    (Original post by SMEGGGY)
    You female? If so typical response. :rolleyes:

    Posted from TSR Mobile
    Fine. I'm a bloke and straight and i concur with that poster.
    (Original post by wickedisgood)
    If my response is so typical, why do guys still not understand that girls can dress however they want and it be for themselves? All that shows is purposeful ignorance tbh.
    Agreed. Her body, her choice.

    Ok it can bring negative attention but that not her fault.

    At the end of the day OP she come home to you
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Me, my girlfriend and a few friends went out the other night. I picked my girlfriends dress, she tried them on I picked the one I liked the most. Half way through the night she changed into a more revealing dress for no reason. During the night she got complements from other boys and it really upset me that I went home (I get really anxious aswell and uncomfortable in situations easily). My GF said that it was nothing to worry about, she said sorry for changing dresses from the one I picked and we moved on.

    This weekend were going out again and she wants to wear the same dress. I don't know how I feel about this.

    Should I be upset that she wants to wear a dress that upset me so much when other people were looking and commenting? I'm not the person to say you can't wear this or that, so I'm in a bit of a situation here.

    Any positive constructive comments welcome.
    Thank you.
    Next time you go out, wear a revealing outfit and see what your girlfriend thinks. If she says something then mention her revealing dress.

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    (Original post by 999tigger)
    You can foil her plan by wearing the dress yourself.
    LMAOOO best solution to this problem
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    It's actually both amusing and cringe-worthy how so many women get some kind of confidence boost from being sexually objectified(because that's the kind of attention you're getting when you wear revealing clothes...the guy isn't thinking about how "beautiful" you are believe me) and in the same instance will argue tooth and nail about their poor little self-esteem having to put up with the insecurity they get from seeing mass-objectification on the media and what-not.

    OP-here's the deal: If your girlfriend gets more attention when she dresses revealingly then when she doesn't, then evidently it follows that the increase in said interest isn't because she herself is attractive-it's because she's displaying herself sexually. Give her an ultimatum-she either switches off her whore radiation or you leave her, because realistically you're not obliged to put up with it.
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    (Original post by katherine9609)
    Most certainly not about being controlled and having a 3rd parent. The only naive person here is you because you think being controlled by your significant other is okay when in fact it's not under any circumstances. If you feel the need to do something you normally wouldn't in order to satisfy your partner then you shouldn't be with them
    You're sure about that?
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    (Original post by katherine9609)
    If you cannot see a difference between receiving compliments and flirting then you need to completely rethink your mind set
    Clue in the colloquialism: 'dressing provocatively'. Girls like this know exactly what they're doing (both to their partners and thirsty onlookers). Fact is, the OP shouldn't really be in such a relationship in the first place - his latent insecurities aren't helped by the underlying power/value imbalance implicit in his account. My advice would be for him to get it all off his chest and hit reset

    not being allowed to dress how you want just because your partner says so is controlling and wrong
    According to a 19 year old feminist. This is the problem with 'progressive' attempts to provide pointers for the young e.g. 'relationship education'. It's based around ideals, not pragmatic reality. In my (relatively considerable) experience, all girls hanker after guys who are daddy AF and desirable girls rarely go awry when their significant other establishes (and is able/willing to enforce) firm boundaries (ideally from the outset)
 
 
 
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