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    (Original post by Physicsuk)
    I'm considering taking Hilary term out, on medical grounds. Does anyone know what the general feelings are on taking terms out as an Undergraduate (physics)? It was also mean me missing collections, could I still progress on to next year without them?
    Do you have sufficient medical evidence you would be able to produce to college (ideally from an Oxford GP if possible)? Have your tutors had any indication of problems last term?

    At the start of the year when I returned for HT10, I was asked whether I wanted to leave and return in October, leave completely or continue. I chose to continue but was pulled out of all tutorials and lectures and my tutors were notified accordingly. I remained in Oxford the whole time and obviously that was across two terms.

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    (Original post by cifes)
    Really really dislike the subject, (forced to apply under threat of being kicked out of the house )
    lol GO TO OXFORD OR GTFO

    I can't honestly believe that...
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    I'm in a similar position at Oxford. I've done a term there and its not what I always imagined it to be. I'm in a small college with a social pool of only about 40 people and I've really struggled to make friends. A lot of the people in my year arent really that social and I'm lonely a lot of the time. The tutor said my work is fine but I'm staying up ridiculous hours to get it done.

    I'm going back next term and I've joined some societies that will give me the opportunity to meet different people outside my college. But I've applied through UCAS for 2011 so I've got the option if things don't work out.

    If I'm being honest I don't think the Oxford way of life suits me and I reckon I would be happier somewhere else. But the job prospects are looming at the back of my mind. And of course the parents are totally against me dropping out... every time I bring it up that I'm unhappy they say they don't want to talk about it...

    I know your problems are different to mine, but I think a term isn't long enough to make the right decision.

    If I was you I would apply through UCAS to give yourself a safety net - the deadline isnt for another few weeks. But definitely go back next term. Coming back to it is going to be completely different from the first term and it might make you change your mind! But if things still aren't working out maybe then is the time to say it's not for you and walk away. I don't think theres any shame in that.

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    (Original post by The_Lonely_Goatherd)
    Wow, I wish I'd known about that in my second year, lol! I think you should def tell them this, even if it only ends up being for a trial period or something. I seriously doubt your tutors would want you to be running yourself into the ground and not getting the right amount of sleep. My JRF was horrified when she realised how I was working and my main tutor ended up with a huge guilt complex about how ill I end up getting. I'm sure a healthy work pattern will help things a bit

    Btw, wanna clarify that the last time I quoted you, I meant to say that in a place full of clever, motivated people, it's easy to feel you're the worst of the bunch and that you're thick when you're really not. That was what I meant, not "zomg, you should keep on working stupid hours and feeling stupid, coz it's Oxford!!!!!" Rather dazed state meant it was worded in a very stupid way
    Don't worry, I interpreted your previous message as you meant it. I do find it really frustrating to think that I may end up having fewer opportunities in life because I went to Oxford and got a lower classification than I probably would have got elsewhere. I am only just starting my collections revision but I think my current attitude is that, ideally, I want a 2.1, and I don't want to give up hope of getting a 2.1 until the end of my fourth year when there is literally nothing more I can do about it.
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    (Original post by Jeykayem)
    Don't worry, I interpreted your previous message as you meant it. I do find it really frustrating to think that I may end up having fewer opportunities in life because I went to Oxford and got a lower classification than I probably would have got elsewhere. I am only just starting my collections revision but I think my current attitude is that, ideally, I want a 2.1, and I don't want to give up hope of getting a 2.1 until the end of my fourth year when there is literally nothing more I can do about it.
    I know I'm not really in the job market yet but from my limited experience of things so far, a 2.2 won't automatically hold you back (obviously depending on what you plan to do). I'd never had anything like a proper job til November but got completely bewildered by the amount of time I had to do so little work at Goldsmiths (being part-time at all). I was going nuts and my Oxford tutors suggested I get some part-time work, so I brushed up my CV.

    I wasn't sure whether to put my classification or not but thought if they were the kinda people to automatically turn me away just on that alone, I probs wouldn't wanna work for them anyway Applied to two arts internships and a music workshop job and had interviews for all three. Got the internship at the LSO (my first ever interview!) and the music workshop job! :awesome: I was told by my LSO boss that I'd really impressed her at the interview (with my stories of interviewing ABBA fans :cool: ) :woo:

    Obviously it's only one person and one story but it shows all is not lost. If I do well on this internship (and apparently I'm too efficient. Despite being occasionally deemed the opposite at Oxford :rolleyes: ), it pretty much sets me up for future posts in arts admin/management and the charities sector
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    (Original post by CulturedBusker)
    I totally understand how you feel. I've just finished the first term of Chemistry at Oxford, and absolutely hate it. I loved chemistry A level, but I'm hating the course so far, and it turns out I'm awful at chemistry - I have been predicted a 3rd. I too am working 80 hours a week, getting 4 or 5 hours sleep a night.

    I had vowed to carry on and finish first year, to give myself a chance, but while I've been trying to do my vacation work and revise for collections I've realised how little I understand, and have become thoroughly depressed by the whole thing (I have a history of depression). So tomorrow I'm going to email my tutor to try and either drop out, or rusticate for a year, and see how I feel. I've decided that my long term health and happiness is more important than a qualification.

    It will be a shame because I love my college, the city and everyone I've met, but hopefully I'll be able to look back and know that I made the right decision.
    Really sorry to hear you've been feeling like this :hugs: Just wanted to say that if you haven't already talked to your college GP about how you've been feeling and sleeping, it might be worth doing so with the view to getting his/her input into any decision college makes about you. In my experience, having a doctor's note can make quite a difference
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    (Original post by Wasps12)
    Get out while you still can, what with the tuition fee rise next year.

    Also who cares if you get kicked out the house, you're a grown up now

    get your facts right mate they dont come in until september 2012. idiot
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    i dont see this idea of graduate prospects. i understand that oxbridge is unparalleled in its prestige etc but are you saying that if you went to a UCL or a Durham you wouldnt have good job prospects? ofcourse you would. if i were you, i would first of all look to change your course. remember this is the last opportunity you will get, its only this year left of the current fees. this will affect the rest of your life, the decisions you make now. and like someone has already said, plan b should be doing ucas again and applying to different unis. then at the end of the year you can assess your situation and make a decision to carry on or do something new.
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    (Original post by chisletts)
    get your facts right mate they dont come in until september 2012. idiot
    Your wrong, if she doesn't "Get out while she can" and apply this year before 15 Jan, she'll be paying the increased tuition fees. If she misses 15 Jan she'll be applying next year (starting Sep 2012), which is what the poster was saying.:rolleyes:
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    (Original post by CulturedBusker)
    I totally understand how you feel. I've just finished the first term of Chemistry at Oxford, and absolutely hate it. I loved chemistry A level, but I'm hating the course so far, and it turns out I'm awful at chemistry - I have been predicted a 3rd. I too am working 80 hours a week, getting 4 or 5 hours sleep a night.
    It seems quite a lot of the chemists feel this way.

    (Original post by TheRustaman)
    Your wrong, if she doesn't "Get out while she can" and apply this year before 15 Jan, she'll be paying the increased tuition fees. If she misses 15 Jan she'll be applying next year (starting Sep 2012), which is what the poster was saying.:rolleyes:
    You can still apply after January 15 but it's not ideal. As others have said, it might be easier to try to last out first year, and then transfer, than to reapply. People are able to go straight into 2nd year at good universities after failing prelims.
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    or just do Hilary term...
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    I am in exactly the same situation. Chemistry, Oxford, female.
    I'd love to drop out, but I can't face the shame. I've thought seriously about suicide. Shame we're doing a subject that let's you do MSDS checks with "do not ingest." It becomes so damn tempting to just end it.
    Goddamn I hate Oxford so much. I just end up crying over my work, even in the vacs.
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    (Original post by student_xyz)
    I am in exactly the same situation. Chemistry, Oxford, female.
    I'd love to drop out, but I can't face the shame. I've thought seriously about suicide. Shame we're doing a subject that let's you do MSDS checks with "do not ingest." It becomes so damn tempting to just end it.
    Goddamn I hate Oxford so much. I just end up crying over my work, even in the vacs.
    :jumphug:

    Does your tutor know you feel like this? You shouldn't suffer in silence: reach out to your tutors and some welfare staff :console:
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    (Original post by student_xyz)
    I am in exactly the same situation. Chemistry, Oxford, female.
    I'd love to drop out, but I can't face the shame. I've thought seriously about suicide. Shame we're doing a subject that let's you do MSDS checks with "do not ingest." It becomes so damn tempting to just end it.
    Goddamn I hate Oxford so much. I just end up crying over my work, even in the vacs.
    TLG is right - you shouldn't suffer in silence. Have you talked to anyone about this? If you don't want to talk to your tutor about it, there should be welfare people in college. And if not in college, I think there are more general university welfare people...
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    (Original post by student_xyz)
    I am in exactly the same situation. Chemistry, Oxford, female.
    I'd love to drop out, but I can't face the shame. I've thought seriously about suicide. Shame we're doing a subject that let's you do MSDS checks with "do not ingest." It becomes so damn tempting to just end it.
    Goddamn I hate Oxford so much. I just end up crying over my work, even in the vacs.
    Just to second those above, please, please talk to someone. It can be any of your tutors, your personal tutor, your college chaplain (you don't have to be religious and they are often very helpful) or any other College officials, the JCR welfare service, the university welfare service, or any of the other people around College really. Just please talk to someone, there is help out there but no one is psychic and typically Oxford students hide any negative feelings so well that tutors won't notice it unless you tell them.

    You are welcome to pm me if you want (though I would be no help with the Chem stuff but if you want to vent) :hugs:
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    To all the above, my parents are sick of me complaining, because they have both been telling me that I'm a born Oxford student, and university will be the best years of my life etc. I've barely made any friends, I didn't really have many at school.
    I tried to talk to my tutors last term, and their responses were "Everyone feels they're not good enough, you'll be fine."
    Eugh. Oh well.
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    (Original post by student_xyz)
    To all the above, my parents are sick of me complaining, because they have both been telling me that I'm a born Oxford student, and university will be the best years of my life etc. I've barely made any friends, I didn't really have many at school.
    I tried to talk to my tutors last term, and their responses were "Everyone feels they're not good enough, you'll be fine."
    Eugh. Oh well.
    Go to the welfare people instead; they will be better attuned to your problems and the support you need. Some tutors are not good at realising that a student is trying to talk about something really serious and it takes a while to filter through that there are real problems.

    I think you could email the OUSU student advice service even during the vacation (at least to make an appointment for the start of Trinity) though it might take them longer to get back to you. When you get back, I would advise you to go and see someone in welfare at your college (see the website or your undergrad handbook). Don't give up, you really do need to get someone to listen to you; once you have one person on your side, everything becomes easier.
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    (Original post by student_xyz)
    To all the above, my parents are sick of me complaining, because they have both been telling me that I'm a born Oxford student, and university will be the best years of my life etc. I've barely made any friends, I didn't really have many at school.
    I tried to talk to my tutors last term, and their responses were "Everyone feels they're not good enough, you'll be fine."
    Eugh. Oh well.
    Did you tell your tutors that you're feeling suicidal though? I imagine they might have a different reaction if you said that...

    Definitely try the welfare tutors. There are some really nice ones out there and like Festina says, when it comes to chaplains it really doesn't matter whether you are Christian or not. I had two amazing welfare tutors who dragged me kicking and screaming to my Finals and one of them was my college chaplain, who I think actually prefers dealing with agnostics and atheists to me
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    Thanks.
    I emailed the counselling service for a consult at the beginning of term. Hopefully things will look up.
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    (Original post by student_xyz)
    Thanks.
    I emailed the counselling service for a consult at the beginning of term. Hopefully things will look up.
    That's a great start, well done!

    Feel free to PM if that would help at all. My time at Oxford certainly wasn't what I'd expected it to be and I was with the counselling service for a year
 
 
 
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