Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Idle)
    It's coming up to 2 years next week since my dad passed from lung cancer... I have a feeling this might turn into a ramble so apologies in advance

    Even 24 months later I still have a feeling of anger, firstly that a great man and dad was robbed of his life too early, secondly that I've had my biggest and only main support taken away from him and thirdly at just how ****ing slowly he was weakened and systematically broken down by this ****ty disease, the only part of him it didn't manage to break was his resolve to live but even that was hard to see through the side effects of the drugs which left him falling asleep halfway through asking a question.

    People say that it 'gets better with time' and in some ways it does. For the first couple of months after he died I didn't feel much, of anything frankly. I can't remember what sparked the grief off, I think it was looking back at holiday photos for the first time but I remember sitting here sobbing for hours. After a few more months it settled down but even now I find the occasional thing of his or walk up the stairs and catch a smell of his scent from somewhere and it brings it all back :moon: I have so much I'd love to say to him and tell him about, here is to hoping that when it's my time I can.
    My mum died of lung cancer. It is a horrible disease.

    I totally get what you mean. I don't think it gets easier as such, but I find it becomes more of a reality and you just grow to live with it if that makes sense. My mum died almost 4 years ago and the slightest thing can have me in tears still.


    Posted from TSR Mobile
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    Hey guys, is there anyone on here who currently has cancer? I just got diagnosed and I'm looking for someone in a similar boat.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    I think my mum has prostate cancer and isn't telling me because I keep seeing letters through the door from a prostate cancer firm and the address is hand-written.


    Posted from TSR Mobile
    • TSR Support Team
    • Very Important Poster
    Offline

    22
    ReputationRep:
    TSR Support Team
    Very Important Poster
    (Original post by Jovan)
    I think my mum has prostate cancer and isn't telling me because I keep seeing letters through the door from a prostate cancer firm and the address is hand-written.


    Posted from TSR Mobile
    Prostate cancer is something only men can get it. It's probably from a charity about something.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by OU Student)
    Prostate cancer is something only men can get it. It's probably from a charity about something.
    -_-


    Posted from TSR Mobile
    • TSR Support Team
    • Very Important Poster
    Offline

    22
    ReputationRep:
    TSR Support Team
    Very Important Poster
    pardon?:confused:
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by OU Student)
    pardon?:confused:
    Idk D;


    Posted from TSR Mobile
    • TSR Support Team
    • Very Important Poster
    Offline

    22
    ReputationRep:
    TSR Support Team
    Very Important Poster
    I need a hug. Granddad has now been given a year to live and has been told he'll be lucky if he lives past Christmas.
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    I just thought I would write a quick post on here;
    After having suspected appendicitis in early September 2012, last year two days before my 16th birthday I was diagnosed with Carcinoid cancer of the appendix, it had spread to my bowls (intestines etc). Back in the end of May I was given the all clear woo!!
    I am more than happy to have any conversations with anyone about my experiences, and your own if you wish... Whether it be answering questions, giving the in depth story or whatever. Just remember the offer is there and there are always people that care and know what you are going/have been through

    To all those that have lost someone due to cancer my love and thoughts go out to you!! <3




    Posted from TSR Mobile
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    Hi Isthenameleft,
    welcome here in that forum. I am interested to hear what you have going to, how your stay at the clinic went, what has been done to you and about your fears, feeling and thoughts. I think, I can feel a littlte bit like you, although I did not had cancer in the end, doctors thought, that I could have abdominal cancer when I stayed at hospital because of often abdominal problems in my youth and teenaged time. I got a very long and intense exam by an oncologist for children, too, at least they found a intestinal cyst and I got surgery of it.
    So, if you like, we could have more conservation about our experiences.
    All the best wishes to you and all outhers. I hope you all feel better and stay as healthy as possible!
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    My dad passed away 5 weeks ago today from stomach cancer.

    It still doesn't feel real and I think im coping too well.

    Im 25 and starting uni in 4 weeks. I just don't think im grieving properly. Im keeping busy and don't feel bad, I get a bit weepy but I just don't know if this is normal?

    Sometimes I think I don't miss him, I know I do and maybe it's just not been long enough. I don't know I just feel weird. Ive just been concentrating on getting his house ready for sale and filling in paperwork. I wish he could see it, I think he'd like it.

    Apologies for the waffle. I don't really know what I hoped to achieve with posting lol.

    Posted from TSR Mobile
    Offline

    16
    ReputationRep:
    My grandfather died a few years ago from kidney cancer. It was a complete shock - he was an incredibly healthy and fit guy, in his sixties, a professional chef and one of the most bouncy and jovial people you would ever meet (typical Italian ) and then within the space of a couple of weeks he deteriorated hugely. I don't really know much about what happened - I was kept out of it - but it hit me so hard when we just suddenly found out he'd died. I barely even knew he was sick at all until I found out he'd passed away. We were really close to him; my mum looked on him as a surrogate father. I just wish I'd known what was happening, but then again back then I might have not been able to handle it...

    I've just been thinking about him again recently because I've started a running programme and hopefully I might be able to get up to the standard where I can do the Race for Life at some point next year
    • TSR Support Team
    • Very Important Poster
    Offline

    22
    ReputationRep:
    TSR Support Team
    Very Important Poster
    (Original post by xHell-lenx)
    My dad passed away 5 weeks ago today from stomach cancer.

    It still doesn't feel real and I think im coping too well.

    Im 25 and starting uni in 4 weeks. I just don't think im grieving properly. Im keeping busy and don't feel bad, I get a bit weepy but I just don't know if this is normal?

    Sometimes I think I don't miss him, I know I do and maybe it's just not been long enough. I don't know I just feel weird. Ive just been concentrating on getting his house ready for sale and filling in paperwork. I wish he could see it, I think he'd like it.

    Apologies for the waffle. I don't really know what I hoped to achieve with posting lol.

    Posted from TSR Mobile
    Sorry to hear that. There's no right or wrong with dealing with this. Some people find it doesn't sick in for a bit.
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    Heyy Naevi,
    Umm well it all began I was taken into the children's emergency ward with suspected appendicitis, after five days in hospital with the doctors all telling me there was nothing wrong, just period pain and they knew it as girls make more fuss?? They finally took me down to operate... I don't really know what happened just the typical timing of 40minutes turned into a 3 hour op.

    A month later I was called into hospital for what I thought was a check up, until I got put into a small room with 5 doctors and the first words spoken where "we don't normally call people back..." From there I was taken up to oncology and my mum was called in. Sorry I am waffling here...

    Personally I think the way they told me could have been done better as I think they are usually dealing with younger kids that they dumbed it down, so much so I had no idea what was wrong with me when I came out of the hospital, until mum said in the car.

    Initially it was rather hard as I was being treated by two hospitals due to the rarity of the cancer (typical person with it is black men 55-65, I am none of those) and they both contradicted them selves. The actual support and care given was fantastic by the majority of doctors/nurses...

    My time in hospital was short lived 12 days after ops (as that is the treatment I had, chemo wouldn't have worked on the cancer) but that was not the best experience as again being 15 at the time I was but into a children's ward but the only kids in where aged 0-4 yrs... Also I believe I had an overdose on morphine but I don't remember it to well as it was in the middle of the night.

    I currently have 3/4 of a small intestine and 1/2 of large left but many other this have been taken out which I don't know of :L any other questions don't hesitate to ask...
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    Heyy xHell-lenx

    I am sorry for your losses!! But good on you for continuing with every thing... I don't think you should feel bad for your feelings, many people cope differently and no way is right or wrong.

    Sometimes it is good to keep yourself busy in these times... But just don't forget to occasionally stop and think (all happy of course) thoughts of your father and that could relieve your doubts about grieving.

    If I can be of any help I am more than happy too
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Isthisnameleft)
    Heyy Naevi,
    Umm well it all began I was taken into the children's emergency ward with suspected appendicitis, after five days in hospital with the doctors all telling me there was nothing wrong, just period pain and they knew it as girls make more fuss?? They finally took me down to operate... I don't really know what happened just the typical timing of 40minutes turned into a 3 hour op.

    A month later I was called into hospital for what I thought was a check up, until I got put into a small room with 5 doctors and the first words spoken where "we don't normally call people back..." From there I was taken up to oncology and my mum was called in. Sorry I am waffling here...

    Personally I think the way they told me could have been done better as I think they are usually dealing with younger kids that they dumbed it down, so much so I had no idea what was wrong with me when I came out of the hospital, until mum said in the car.

    Initially it was rather hard as I was being treated by two hospitals due to the rarity of the cancer (typical person with it is black men 55-65, I am none of those) and they both contradicted them selves. The actual support and care given was fantastic by the majority of doctors/nurses...

    My time in hospital was short lived 12 days after ops (as that is the treatment I had, chemo wouldn't have worked on the cancer) but that was not the best experience as again being 15 at the time I was but into a children's ward but the only kids in where aged 0-4 yrs... Also I believe I had an overdose on morphine but I don't remember it to well as it was in the middle of the night.

    I currently have 3/4 of a small intestine and 1/2 of large left but many other this have been taken out which I don't know of :L any other questions don't hesitate to ask...
    Both you and the only person I've ever known who had cancer were immediately taken to oncology after being told. I was told I had cancer three weeks ago now, and the closest I've come to a specialist doctor is when he said hi to me in a hallway. He should have all my test results now, and I still don't know when I have an appointment with him or when I start treatment/exactly what treatment I'm having.
    • TSR Support Team
    • Very Important Poster
    Offline

    22
    ReputationRep:
    TSR Support Team
    Very Important Poster
    (Original post by syrettd)
    Both you and the only person I've ever known who had cancer were immediately taken to oncology after being told. I was told I had cancer three weeks ago now, and the closest I've come to a specialist doctor is when he said hi to me in a hallway. He should have all my test results now, and I still don't know when I have an appointment with him or when I start treatment/exactly what treatment I'm having.
    I would chase it up if I were you.

    How are doing, if you don't mind me asking?
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    Heyy Syrettd,
    Do you know that it is definitely cancer?? But if it is I wouldn't worry to much about it as they only call you in straight away if it is fast growing/ terminal I believe. However saying that most things hospital things take 2+ weeks and I know that when I had to go in it took some time after the first appointment as the don't want to say something they are not certain on.

    If you are really worried call in and ask when your appointment is and just let them know you haven't seen anyone just incase they have forgotten
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by OU Student)
    I would chase it up if I were you.

    How are doing, if you don't mind me asking?
    I was going to chase it up tomorrow, but they phoned me five minutes ago to tell me to come in tomorrow so at least that's sorted. I'm not doing that great really, I had my heart broken by someone I was/am so sure was 'the one' and I just don't want to talk to anyone I know except him, but he hasn't contacted me since before I found out. Then I've had a cough for five weeks and I had to go to A+E after I injured my shoulder, and keep getting infections...so yeah not too good at the moment!

    (Original post by Isthisnameleft)
    Heyy Syrettd,
    Do you know that it is definitely cancer?? But if it is I wouldn't worry to much about it as they only call you in straight away if it is fast growing/ terminal I believe. However saying that most things hospital things take 2+ weeks and I know that when I had to go in it took some time after the first appointment as the don't want to say something they are not certain on.

    If you are really worried call in and ask when your appointment is and just let them know you haven't seen anyone just incase they have forgotten
    Definitely cancer, kept getting called in for more tests and then, until now so seven days, nothing. I hope the appointment starts things off quite quick, I've found another tumour.
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    Syrettd,

    Well at least you have an appointment!! Hopefully the ball should be rolling, where is your cancer??

    It seems like every thing is going all wrong at the same time right?? I felt like that but put a positive spin on it... At least you get it all dealt with now, as I am still seeing my doctors about non cancer related issues (bones :/) but as you are now on the system they will do as much as they can to sort everything out!!

    With regards to your partner, (I am no relationship expert) but I lost some of my closes friends throughout the whole experience but others I have come closer with!! It is just that some cant deal with the news, this is not your fault... But if you do want to voice your opinions with someone who has been threw it then do feel free to send messages through my inbox
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: May 8, 2014
Poll
Do you agree with the PM's proposal to cut tuition fees for some courses?

The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

Write a reply...
Reply
Hide
Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.