Could Women Cope With The Amount Of Sexual Rejection Men Cope With ? Watch

Eveiebaby
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#141
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#141
(Original post by Mike9910)
Yes but the implication is while you would not date someone who is richer than you, you could not also date someone who is poorer than you either, (to a significant level?).

So all those poor, nice guys who otherwise have many things going for them, well they would have no chance of dating you.

There's no shame in what you're doing. It's just that to act this way you'd have to be very discerning about who you date and how much money they have.

Yes those men who complain about hypergamy are probably self advocating: they're poor, so they want women to ignore wealth as being a factor in dating. We all have the same thinking: it would be nice if our weaknesses mattered less and our strengths mattered more.

From a woman's POV a wealthy partner makes sense: it gives her allot of flexibility if she wants to have children (maybe she wants to take time off work to raise the children), it provides security, and it indicates other good traits that a man would have, such as ambition or education, or smarts.
I just think that being with a man much wealthier than myself, puts me in a position of complete vulnerability and I'm not willing to let a man have total control of my life like that. It only offers security if the relationship is death do us part. If the relationship fails, I'd be out on my arse and fair play, I say. I wouldn't have earned the house or the car so I don't deserve continued access to the assets.

For this reason, I think that it's important for women to maintain their value in workplace so that at any given time, they are able to maintain themselves/have assets if their circumstances change.

I'm an educated woman looking for my equal. What other people do with their lives is up to them, but because I'm looking for a co-dominant relationship, yes of course I have to be discerning. I take matters into my own hands and approach guys. Not many. But I will approach if they are MY kind of attractive and then perhaps suggest hanging out if they haven't said anything that indicates a) pushy sexual vibes b)over traditional/old fashioned thinking c) they're living an extended student life (I'm 29) living an immature lifestyle, d) There is mutual enthusiasm for the conversation.
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theDanIdentity
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#142
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#142
(Original post by Eveiebaby)
I think that a lot of the problem with this is that most women cannot make a snap judgement about whether they are attracted to someone. I can think that someone is pleasing to the eye, but I'd only suggest hanging out if after talking to them, they had something more about them and that they were interesting to speak to. I wouldn't just push things through because I thought they were pleasing to the eye. That isn't "enough" to warrant full attraction.

In my case a guy just stepping to me, immediately being really OTT with flirtation, I find rather disingenuous. I could have a range of horrendous personality traits and they're all over me. I don't respect that.

It's probably why I'm more likely to connect with someone based on their interests, views or politics initially.
I never specified whether it be pleasing to the eye; or pleasing overall; for that I apologize.

The above reply to you, still stands; Whether it be 'pleasing to the eye' or fully interested in the guy and his personality. Proof, the amount of threads (and real life instances) that I've seen started by females, who've fallen for the guy and his personality; asking how to go about approaching and signifying interest 'without seeming desperate'; is just yet another reason that I still stand by what I said before.

'I could have a range of horrendous personality traits and they're all over me. I don't respect that.'

True. But not giving the guy ample time to learn about these, is what's at fault here. This is because, you're playing by 'safe' rules; which is what, this entire thread is about. You would be, in that situation, playing by rules that prevent the guy from getting to know those personality traits. You do not allow the guy to get to know those, before you eject him out of the conversation. It links in with this thread, as this would be rejection. In that situation, you would be rejecting the guy before he's aware of those 'personality traits'.

Moreover, where the genders to be reversed; and you were to be rejected, in the same manner as you've just specified; you would be appalled; as you wouldn't have been given the chance to fully get to know the guy, before you were kicked out.


And in addition from the way you've been posting about the thread, it seems like you've probably never had to approach a guy before (I don't blame you, I blame the passiveness of the female species); therefore where a situation for you to do so present itself, so that you would be "more likely to connect with someone based on their interests, views or politics initially"; you wouldn't be able to deal with the fact that the guy might reject you. The evidence that backs up my hypothesis:

'In my case a guy just stepping to me' < this proves that you've not really had to:

take the initiate, be assertive, confident, charming, funny; e.t.c to either begin a conversation with a guy you found 'intriguing' to warrant that conversation and to then further attempt to connect with him on what level you find attractive enough.

This therefore means that you've not really had to go through rejections by the opposite sex, because of your initiation into the opposite sex.

This as such says that: you would like to connect with a guy based on his interests, views/politics initially, when the guy has approached you on the matter; rather than you approaching the guy on the matter. Leading to my conclusion:


"That, women do not know how to cope with the amount of sexual rejection that men face."

or another conclusion: that you would like a guy to initiate conversation on those topics and try to connect with you on those particular topics; even though you wouldn't do so yourself - so that you wouldn't seem 'desperate'.
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Eveiebaby
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#143
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#143
(Original post by theDanIdentity)
I never specified whether it be pleasing to the eye; or pleasing overall; for that I apologize.

The above reply to you, still stands; Whether it be 'pleasing to the eye' or fully interested in the guy and his personality. Proof, the amount of threads (and real life instances) that I've seen started by females, who've fallen for the guy and his personality; asking how to go about approaching and signifying interest 'without seeming desperate'; is just yet another reason that I still stand by what I said before.

'I could have a range of horrendous personality traits and they're all over me. I don't respect that.'

True. But not giving the guy ample time to learn about these, is what's at fault here. This is because, you're playing by 'safe' rules; which is what, this entire thread is about. You would be, in that situation, playing by rules that prevent the guy from getting to know those personality traits. You do not allow the guy to get to know those, before you eject him out of the conversation. It links in with this thread, as this would be rejection. In that situation, you would be rejecting the guy before he's aware of those 'personality traits'.

Moreover, where the genders to be reversed; and you were to be rejected, in the same manner as you've just specified; you would be appalled; as you wouldn't have been given the chance to fully get to know the guy, before you were kicked out.........

I have and do approach men actually. I've mentioned that at various points in the thread, but I can understand that you might have missed that in the large swathes of text.

I actually approached both the last two guys I dated. My current boyfriend, I approached him because I was interested in Belgian culture and I knew him distantly from other people in the social group.

I've probably approached less than 10 guys in my life tbh though. If I had "**** off" vibes, I would retreat without embarrassing myself by asking to hang out or whatever.

I approach guys because I find more attractive those who haven't got the cocky banter of those who seem to have rehearsed their approach women to the point there feels no soul. It's usually a small number of guys who ask out most of the women. I'm interested in the other ones who aren't trying to be a loser PUA, are just getting on with their day and are a bit reserved.

I am also hit on by some guys, but not excessively and rarely with style. I thought body language was pretty straightforward for both sexes, so pardon me for that assumption.
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Bushido Brown
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#144
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#144
(Original post by Rakas21)
Fear of rejection for men is something that must be overcome. It separates the weak from the chaff.

Equally, women should stop requiring validation from random men visa vi their appearance. Of course they should still look attractive, but they should feel attractive regardless of male opinion.
Seconded.
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435540
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#145
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#145
(Original post by Eveiebaby)
I'm not that bothered about wealth but I'm not going to put up with someone who's going to leech off me either. I believe men shouldn't put up with leeching too in return for good looking women if they don't want to perpetuate hypergamous behavior.

I've also had this mentality since around 23/24. I don't think it's anything to do with hitting a wall, it's just that it's a far better indicator of the most respectful interest if someone has a long term approach with me. That can only be determined by their attitudes and behaviours around me.
all women are hypergamous. however, the ones we want to marry are those that suppress those biological desires.
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thechibi
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#146
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#146
I think women could put up with that rejection. I suspect a lot of women don't ask guys out or make the first move because it's seen as desperate or something worse.

I had a friend complain that women would never talk to him, so I pointed out that I talked to him (and maybe even liked him). He retorted that he meant 'a hot woman'. Owch.
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ChaoticButterfly
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#147
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#147
(Original post by thechibi)
I think women could put up with that rejection. I suspect a lot of women don't ask guys out or make the first move because it's seen as desperate or something worse.

I had a friend complain that women would never talk to him, so I pointed out that I talked to him (and maybe even liked him). He retorted that he meant 'a hot woman'. Owch.
His problem might be more that he is a knob
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yo radical one
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#148
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#148
Women love male attention and validation, no idea what you are complaining about OP, at the same time, if the prospect of getting rejected by a woman is something which makes you feel afraid, you haven't lived.


(Original post by thechibi)
I think women could put up with that rejection. I suspect a lot of women don't ask guys out or make the first move because it's seen as desperate or something worse.

I had a friend complain that women would never talk to him, so I pointed out that I talked to him (and maybe even liked him). He retorted that he meant 'a hot woman'. Owch.

That's rude and disrespectful, but his problem is sitting around waiting for what he wants to just appear in his lap. Like a lazy cat who just wants an owner to give him his food.
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ChaoticButterfly
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#149
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(Original post by yo radical one)
Women love male attention and validation, no idea what you are complaining about OP, at the same time, if the prospect of getting rejected by a woman is something which makes you feel afraid, you haven't lived.





That's rude and disrespectful, but his problem is sitting around waiting for what he wants to just appear in his lap. Like a lazy cat who just wants an owner to give him his food.
That isn't a very good analogy considering said cat get food nine times out of ten.
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Akbar2k7
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#150
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#150
(Original post by silverbolt)
Your really quoting a movie that is now 15 years old. Its from a time when most of the age range on here were still in nappies.

Just shows how old i am to ahve got it lol.

Anyway can someone show me an actual link to this programme? Id really like to see it
American Psycho
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Anonymous #1
#151
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#151
I would comment productively, but having spent about 10 minutes reading all the responses, I'll say instead that most of the messages here are pretty horrible about any opinions that don't mirror their own. It makes others who aren't as brash reluctant to speak up.
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balanced
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#152
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#152
The real issues are things like active discrimination against men, women are put first to try to not look sexist.
the pay gap, with women under 30(before the majority do, go off on maternity leave) earning 2.2% MORE than men.

when it comes to relationships men are expected to be loving, caring, then romantic, then strong, then loving, independent, strong, romantic, strong, caring , independent, family man.
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Zeldaintheflesh
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#153
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#153
I've put myself out there plenty of times and been rejected? :L
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Anonymous #1
#154
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#154
(Original post by sacca)
uh no we're not
its just that there is an epidemic of sad young boys on the internet blind to their own priveledges spouting misogynistic crap like the OP.
Excuse me? The OP had the most egalitarian view of everyone in the whole thread.
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Anonymous #1
#155
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#155
(Original post by ChickenMadness)
your perspective is actually amazing.

If you look at this from an objective view.

1) study that helps women - everyone is happy to participate
2) study that helps men - everyone apart from feminists are happy to participate.

you can only conclude that the feminists that took part are extremely selfish.

I don't label myself as anything (MRA) btw lol. I'm just a normal person.
Oh but you forget that (1) is a good thing because it shows that the majority of people, whatever gender are unselfish and are happy to contribute to a good cause. Just because some feminist extremists (2) won't do something good for society doesn't mean everyone else should be like that. This just shows that people who participated in (1) are much nicer people.
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Anonymous #1
#156
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#156
I HATE threads like this, they really do bring out the worst in people.
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Anonymous #1
#157
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#157
(Original post by ChickenMadness)
you're a bigot.
doesn't take me any qualifications to see that
Just ignore her, the ironic thing about this conversation is I've seen more sexist comments from the women in this thread than the men.
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biggronn
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#158
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#158
most would develop mental diseases

but i turn down women all of the time...lot of em keep askin why why why...they cant just let it go like some men can...
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