Mental Health Support Society XVIII

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    I'm finding it hard to deal with my OCD, BDD, depression and everything else, especially with how therapy has been going. I used to be very open to my mum and Callan and even those online about how I feel but lately I just don't have the strength to if that makes sense? I just find it draining to talk but its also draining to keep it all in too.

    On the plus side, cat sitting at my mum's went well only took one panic attack which was a relief. Back home to Callan and our cats today. Looking forward to being back at my own flat

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    (Original post by cosmic angel)
    No family, some friends but there are some issues I can't talk about to anyone. Yes that's true, it feels awful when someone does not understand, or, even worse, trivializes an issue you're dealing with.

    I honestly think fitting in is just an act most of the time. It's easier for some because they are better actors and actresses, cultural and language barriers aside.
    Ahh yeah, I know what you mean. I have very few people that I can talk to about things. Have you been to your GP or thought about having therapy? It may help you Yep, completely agree. Unfortunately, it happens too much

    You are probably right. I just see so many people that seem to fit right in with other people that it's annoying and upsetting that I try so hard and still can't. Obviously, life is more than just 'fitting in' with others though.
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    Second (well, first) year officially over! :woo:
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    I didn't know it costs £33 to get a doctor's note. What's a someone who has been struggling with depression supposed to do if I can't get evidence to support my deadline extension request because it's too costly for a student?

    I will push through and meet the deadline like I always do but it might not be the best work I can produce.
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    (Original post by Airmed)
    Second (well, first) year officially over! :woo:
    :woo:
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    I had my first panic attack today, not to mention bring shouted at over the phone because I'm too p tired to go out.
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    (Original post by moment of truth)
    Ahh yeah, I know what you mean. I have very few people that I can talk to about things. Have you been to your GP or thought about having therapy? It may help you Yep, completely agree. Unfortunately, it happens too much

    You are probably right. I just see so many people that seem to fit right in with other people that it's annoying and upsetting that I try so hard and still can't. Obviously, life is more than just 'fitting in' with others though.
    Yeah, in fact I went over to speak to a counsellor very recently for the first time in a long time. Didn't seem to understand and wouldn't let me speak as much, which I can forgive as she may have been rushed/having a bad day, but also outright told me that I didn't need any counselling, which was a dealbreaker... So, I've made a new appointment and requested a different counsellor.

    That happens to me too. What's changed that's made you less able to fit in on tsr?
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    (Original post by WBZ144)
    I didn't know it costs £33 to get a doctor's note. What's a someone who has been struggling with depression supposed to do if I can't get evidence to support my deadline extension request because it's too costly for a student?

    I will push through and meet the deadline like I always do but it might not be the best work I can produce.
    I thought they were free
    I'd still invest in it if at all possible, and if it makes a positive difference, because what is £33 compared to the 9k you're paying for each year your degree.
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    (Original post by drbluebox)
    I was just thinking about my mental health, the reason I stopped drinking and cant take any drugs is all they do is give me a rush of adrenaline or whatever and when that feelings gone I feel worse than before I even took it.

    When I used to feel normal (which was when I had low self esteem but enjoyed life) I had a permanent adrenaline feeling though not to extremes so I could go to corner shop and feel a little ticklish (so thats why I assume adrenaline) and very minor giggles as in I would smile and every now and again would make a sound like "heh" even when playing a video game my heart would beat faster and my feet would start tapping faster and faster.

    Sometimes I was so excited I would literally just make strange sounds like "yay" "woo" as my body was so tickish/tingly.

    Though that may be more due to the fact I am mildly autistic.

    In recent years I have not felt that once, well I have felt some of those symptoms but not the whole picture.
    My doctor just shoves antidepressants at me thinking I'll be fine, but the thing is that it just makes everything so much worse...
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    (Original post by cosmic angel)
    I thought they were free
    I'd still invest in it if at all possible, and if it makes a positive difference, because what is £33 compared to the 9k you're paying for each year your degree.
    I thought so too, until today.

    I'm doing a postgrad now so it's 6k but you're right; seems worth it so will see what I can do
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    (Original post by WBZ144)
    I thought so too, until today.

    I'm doing a postgrad now so it's 6k but you're right; seems worth it so will see what I can do
    Ah hope it all works out.
    And try to keep a good positive mindset, it's crucial to getting work done. (Something I need to say to myself.)
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    You are all really lovely people on here btw
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    Anyone else find it so hard to stay in contact with people? I have a few close friends and whenever they text, I always feel bad because I can't keep a convo going these days. I either feel too drained to reply or forget and that's not like me, I used to text 24/7. That only adds to the guilt and then makes me feel even more bloody drained and less likely to reply.

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    (Original post by cosmic angel)
    Yeah, in fact I went over to speak to a counsellor very recently for the first time in a long time. Didn't seem to understand and wouldn't let me speak as much, which I can forgive as she may have been rushed/having a bad day, but also outright told me that I didn't need any counselling, which was a dealbreaker... So, I've made a new appointment and requested a different counsellor.

    That happens to me too. What's changed that's made you less able to fit in on tsr?
    Ohh, that's not good I recently finished my therapy and was incredibly lucky to have a therapist that was so understanding and helpful. I wrote a blog post about it a couple of days ago, too. Definitely try again and I really hope the new counsellor is more helpful!

    It's quite hard to explain. It could just be the way I have progressed over the years and the fact that my mental health has become much worse over the last year or so. I don't feel like TSR has really changed a huge amount, but many of the people that I knew on TSR a while ago aren't on here anymore, so that is probably it. TSR can be a lonely place, in my opinion, and the problem lies when you come on here to get away from feeling lonely in real life and it just magnifies the way you are feeling. I hope that makes sense What about you?

    (Original post by Spock's Socks)
    Anyone else find it so hard to stay in contact with people? I have a few close friends and whenever they text, I always feel bad because I can't keep a convo going these days. I either feel too drained to reply or forget and that's not like me, I used to text 24/7. That only adds to the guilt and then makes me feel even more bloody drained and less likely to reply.

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    I am normally the other person who tries to reply as soon as I can and wants to talk, although I do find it really hard to keep a conversation going, at times. I have noticed that people just take their time with replies.

    It is hard to reply to people if you aren't feeling good. Have your friends mentioned it to you?
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    (Original post by Spock's Socks)
    Anyone else find it so hard to stay in contact with people? I have a few close friends and whenever they text, I always feel bad because I can't keep a convo going these days. I either feel too drained to reply or forget and that's not like me, I used to text 24/7. That only adds to the guilt and then makes me feel even more bloody drained and less likely to reply.

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    Definitely like this. Not so much on here but irl i've pretty much cut myself off from everybody and on the odd occasion someone does try to contact me I really struggle to make myself reply.


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    Don't normally post stuff like this but how do people deal with self-loathing? I always hate myself and always have done but for some reason it's so much more intense at the minute and don't really know what to do. It doesn't help that my physical health is (even more!) completely screwed so I can't even distract myself, just constantly doing bad stuff and really wanting to do worse.
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    (Original post by furryface12)
    Don't normally post stuff like this but how do people deal with self-loathing? I always hate myself and always have done but for some reason it's so much more intense at the minute and don't really know what to do. It doesn't help that my physical health is (even more!) completely screwed so I can't even distract myself, just constantly doing bad stuff and really wanting to do worse.
    I wish I could give you advice because I am pretty well rehearsed in self loathing, but I have still not figured out how to deal with it myself. Big hugs though :hugs:
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    (Original post by furryface12)
    Don't normally post stuff like this but how do people deal with self-loathing? I always hate myself and always have done but for some reason it's so much more intense at the minute and don't really know what to do. It doesn't help that my physical health is (even more!) completely screwed so I can't even distract myself, just constantly doing bad stuff and really wanting to do worse.
    This suggestion won't necessarily work but it's a nice thing to do anyway: if you feel comfortable doing this and can explain to your friends why you're asking them to do this, ask your friends, family and other loved ones to write why they like/love you. Then put it all together in a scrapbook, perhaps with pictures!

    The idea behind the suggestion is to have hardcore evidence to hand, to ward off any negative thoughts/self-loathing/voices, etc
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    Really worried my paranoias back
    The MH nurse did say its most likely stress related so it would make sense. But its one more thing i really dont need right now

    Wôrk have been amazing and i cant thank them enough. My supervisor picked me up last night and instead of going to a session we sat in the office to give me time to sort stuff out and print stuff off i need to take to the council. He deffinately helped me physically cheer up which was good.


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    (Original post by Airmed)
    I wish I could give you advice because I am pretty well rehearsed in self loathing, but I have still not figured out how to deal with it myself. Big hugs though :hugs:
    Thanks, sorry you too :hugs: not sure as I knew it was possible more than I did before tbh but apparently had to prove myself wrong on that! Hope you find a way somehow too

    (Original post by The_Lonely_Goatherd)
    This suggestion won't necessarily work but it's a nice thing to do anyway: if you feel comfortable doing this and can explain to your friends why you're asking them to do this, ask your friends, family and other loved ones to write why they like/love you. Then put it all together in a scrapbook, perhaps with pictures!

    The idea behind the suggestion is to have hardcore evidence to hand, to ward off any negative thoughts/self-loathing/voices, etc
    There's not really anyone left I could do it with stuff I already have I guess but feel like I'm just making people like me somehow and I don't know why they're nice to me anyway.

    Thank you both, hope you guys are (relatively) alright


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    #1

    There is so so much noise everywhere, i can't get away from it. Just normal sounds enrage me and put me on edge i can't describe it really. Everything just seems so much louder and even people just shuffling about i feel so so angry with them it is ridiculous really
    and Airmed and furryface12 i'm being a hypocrite here but try not to loathe yourselves:hugs: ik it is hard because i hate myself with a passion but honestly you are both lovely x
 
 
 
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