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How to get my boyfriend to forgive me? watch

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    Move on and find a man that's as low as you
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    #1

    Whiles you're at it, I think get off this thread; it's really hostile and it's not good for you. PM the only two people on this thread who I've seen give you actual sympathy (the empathetic girl with history and the expert on antidepressants), and stay away from negativity. Work on back-up plans for employment and housing, take my other advice with volunteering and hobbies etc to give yourself something good to do and increase your employability, break up with your boyfriend and see if you can come to an amiable agreement to stay friends because you have nowhere to go right now.

    There is absolutely no point continuing this relationship, but it is up to him whether or not he wants you. Just be grateful he's being nice rn. Good luck.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Depression is a horrible mental illness which millions of people suffer from, which you said you had.On a serious note, if you do have depression, you should see a doctor.

    Your boyfriend is not obliged to take you back. You need to take a break for yourself, figure yourself out as a person outside of a relationship, get therapy, make friends, fill your time with good and productive things. Your attitude in a relationship seems toxic, and it takes a lot of bravery to evaluate yourself.

    Save your poor boyfriend any more heartache because what you did imo is unforgivable. Sure it wasn't emotional cheating but you still clashed genitals with another person outside an exclusive relationship, and that honestly hurts even just reading tbh.
    What do you mean 'toxic'? I messed up, I admit but that doesn't really mean the whole relationship was toxic.

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Well, if you don't have a mental health issue, and you hate therapy, I suggest investing time in a hobby? Giving yourself something productive to do will help you get out of the cycle you're in. Joining group sports can help you learn to work in a team again. Volunteer to get a real sense of giving back to people instead of taking. You're hanging onto this relationship in a parasitic way (not to be take offensively), where your "sanity" depends on this boyfriend, and it doesn't work. Honestly, give yourself a chance to find a new purpose...and a new circle of friends whiles you're at it. Seriously, just try your best.
    I've lost interest in most of my hobbies to be honest (except for stuff that doesn't require any effort) and I'm not sure if I can get it back. I'm genuinely too tired for any sports/outdoor activities although I used to love them (probably because of anemia plus really underweight atm). I do have friends but I just can't bring myself to care about them anymore and I've distanced myself from them lately. So yeah.........

    (Original post by Thequiteguy)
    Move on and find a man that's as low as you
    That would be you I guess.
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    (Original post by Ciel.)
    What do you mean 'toxic'? I messed up, I admit but that doesn't really mean the whole relationship was toxic.



    I've lost interest in most of my hobbies to be honest (except for stuff that doesn't require any effort) and I'm not sure if I can get it back. I'm genuinely too tired for any sports/outdoor activities although I used to love them (probably because of anemia plus really underweight atm). I do have friends but I just can't bring myself to care about them anymore and I've distanced myself from them lately. So yeah.........



    That would be you I guess.

    Yes you got me, I cheat on people grats
    • #1
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    (Original post by Ciel.)
    What do you mean 'toxic'? I messed up, I admit but that doesn't really mean the whole relationship was toxic.


    I've lost interest in most of my hobbies to be honest (except for stuff that doesn't require any effort) and I'm not sure if I can get it back. I'm genuinely too tired for any sports/outdoor activities although I used to love them (probably because of anemia plus really underweight atm). I do have friends but I just can't bring myself to care about them anymore and I've distanced myself from them lately. So yeah.........
    By toxic, I mean that no one is winning here. After reading more, I do have to honestly apologise for prejudging you, but it doesn't excuse what you did.

    Anaemia would obviously affect your physical state...have you gone to your GP for tablets? Just to bring Iron levels up and such.

    It's no harm finding a different doctor who could help you. I KNOW you don't want to, but honestly you could end up dying which I would hate to happen.

    If you haven't already, I guess you can find support groups with real people like you. Perhaps the daunting task of going through recovery alone is why you're not improving. You need to just NOT be in a relationship if your actions hurt other people and yourself.

    You just have to say no and put your foot down with yourself sometimes. Please just try your best mate.

    I'm rooting for you. I'm still mad about how you treated your boyfriend, but honestly I hope it works out.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Whiles you're at it, I think get off this thread; it's really hostile and it's not good for you. PM the only two people on this thread who I've seen give you actual sympathy (the empathetic girl with history and the expert on antidepressants), and stay away from negativity. Work on back-up plans for employment and housing, take my other advice with volunteering and hobbies etc to give yourself something good to do and increase your employability, break up with your boyfriend and see if you can come to an amiable agreement to stay friends because you have nowhere to go right now.

    There is absolutely no point continuing this relationship, but it is up to him whether or not he wants you. Just be grateful he's being nice rn. Good luck.
    I can deal with the mean comments, it's fine. Should've expected them. I can't imagine going back to work, though. But I don't want to go on any sort of benefits etc., either. I don't know what I want. I just don't want to think about the future.

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    By toxic, I mean that no one is winning here. After reading more, I do have to honestly apologise for prejudging you, but it doesn't excuse what you did.

    Anaemia would obviously affect your physical state...have you gone to your GP for tablets? Just to bring Iron levels up and such.

    It's no harm finding a different doctor who could help you. I KNOW you don't want to, but honestly you could end up dying which I would hate to happen.

    If you haven't already, I guess you can find support groups with real people like you. Perhaps the daunting task of going through recovery alone is why you're not improving. You need to just NOT be in a relationship if your actions hurt other people and yourself.

    You just have to say no and put your foot down with yourself sometimes. Please just try your best mate.

    I'm rooting for you. I'm still mad about how you treated your boyfriend, but honestly I hope it works out.
    No, to be honest I don't care enough to get treatment for it. Yeah maybe I should find online groups like that. I just find it hard to find any motivation, to do anything. But thank you, that's so nice of you.
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    (Original post by Ciel.)
    I can deal with the mean comments, it's fine. Should've expected them. I can't imagine going back to work, though. But I don't want to go on any sort of benefits etc., either. I don't know what I want. I just don't want to think about the future.


    No, to be honest I don't care enough to get treatment for it. Yeah maybe I should find online groups like that. I just find it hard to find any motivation, to do anything. But thank you, that's so nice of you.

    Definitely do not get off this thread, I love the fact you stick up for yourself against the mean people who are probably hypocrites who cheat themselves or have been cheated on or their terrified it will happen to them one day and that is why they are so angry. But it's good to have some people on your side as well as people who are not to balance it out. But when i mean on your side i mean no one really condones it unless they have done it themselves and has no conscious but just because i would never do it does'nt mean i can judge others for it like i'm God.

    But it's really low down of the person to use information i wrote about my medical problems to write that i am sympathetic just because of my medical history,
    What a dumb ass. If i never had any problems or had never written about them they would not be able to use that. I feel like i should never have been so honest but then again i think why should i keep quiet about it. Thousands of people have the same medical problems as you or myself and thousands of people cheat on their partners which is why i do not express anger towards you, it has nothing to do with the fact i had or have medical problems myself, that's just pure ignorance to think that. I don't have to agree with what everyone else thinks and holding on to anger like they all are is not healthy.

    And telling you to leave your boyfriend, definitely don't do that either because it's only his choice, I hope he does forgive you eventually but it will take time because it's really ignorant for anyone to get into a relationship and think they are so wonderful no one will ever cheat on them.
    Everyone deserves a second or Third chance and it's up to the person who has been cheated on to decide how long they will put up with it and how many chances they will give someone
    Thousands of people are cheated on but they never find out about it or the person who cheated has no balls to admit it.
    I think it took balls to start this thread knowing you will get lots of hate and at least you were not cowardly hiding behind being anonymous.
    You are already beating yourself up over it and even if you had the attitude that you don't care that you did it i would still never get angry about it because i know these things happen with other people, it's not a shock.

    We have all seen this type of thing on chat shows or read about them, most of the people on this forum probably cheat but their not going to be honest about it.
    Although i have seen a few threads people started where they admit they are cheating, I just laugh at how honest those people are for being brave enough to write those threads and it's even more hillarious how angry people respond to it.
    It's life, nothing anyone can do to stop it.

    I have anaemia too, i've had it for many years. I hate taking pills for it so sometimes i don't bother but i'm trying to be good and stick to taking them everyday.
    Everytime i go to the doctor for simple problems like leg cramps, etc they always want to send me to the hospital to get blood tests, it's really annoying, it's a good thing i'm not scared of needles.

    But to motivate myself i decided to go back to college but to do something fun like a music course or i would be at home all day being bored. Maybe you could think about that or any course you want to do.
    I don't really want to go back to work either because i've done lots of different jobs but i will have to at least get a part time job when i go to college and i hate the idea of working for free again because i have done lots of voluntary work before.
    I'd love to get a part time job working from home but they are scams on the internet.
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    (Original post by Judge Judy)
    Definitely do not get off this thread, I love the fact you stick up for yourself against the mean people who are probably hypocrites who cheat themselves or have been cheated on or their terrified it will happen to them one day and that is why they are so angry. But it's good to have some people on your side as well as people who are not to balance it out. But when i mean on your side i mean no one really condones it unless they have done it themselves and has no conscious but just because i would never do it does'nt mean i can judge others for it like i'm God.

    But it's really low down of the person to use information i wrote about my medical problems to write that i am sympathetic just because of my medical history,
    What a dumb ass. If i never had any problems or had never written about them they would not be able to use that. I feel like i should never have been so honest but then again i think why should i keep quiet about it. Thousands of people have the same medical problems as you or myself and thousands of people cheat on their partners which is why i do not express anger towards you, it has nothing to do with the fact i had or have medical problems myself, that's just pure ignorance to think that. I don't have to agree with what everyone else thinks and holding on to anger like they all are is not healthy.

    And telling you to leave your boyfriend, definitely don't do that either because it's only his choice, I hope he does forgive you eventually but it will take time because it's really ignorant for anyone to get into a relationship and think they are so wonderful no one will ever cheat on them.
    Everyone deserves a second or Third chance and it's up to the person who has been cheated on to decide how long they will put up with it and how many chances they will give someone
    Thousands of people are cheated on but they never find out about it or the person who cheated has no balls to admit it.
    I think it took balls to start this thread knowing you will get lots of hate and at least you were not cowardly hiding behind being anonymous.
    You are already beating yourself up over it and even if you had the attitude that you don't care that you did it i would still never get angry about it because i know these things happen with other people, it's not a shock.

    We have all seen this type of thing on chat shows or read about them, most of the people on this forum probably cheat but their not going to be honest about it.
    Although i have seen a few threads people started where they admit they are cheating, I just laugh at how honest those people are for being brave enough to write those threads and it's even more hillarious how angry people respond to it.
    It's life, nothing anyone can do to stop it.

    I have anaemia too, i've had it for many years. I hate taking pills for it so sometimes i don't bother but i'm trying to be good and stick to taking them everyday.
    Everytime i go to the doctor for simple problems like leg cramps, etc they always want to send me to the hospital to get blood tests, it's really annoying, it's a good thing i'm not scared of needles.

    But to motivate myself i decided to go back to college but to do something fun like a music course or i would be at home all day being bored. Maybe you could think about that or any course you want to do.
    I don't really want to go back to work either because i've done lots of different jobs but i will have to at least get a part time job when i go to college and i hate the idea of working for free again because i have done lots of voluntary work before.
    I'd love to get a part time job working from home but they are scams on the internet.
    Yeah well we are still living together but not sure for how much longer. Oh no, sorry to hear that you've anemia too! It sucks! Looks like you have some nice plans, though. Or maybe you could do some sort of IT course? It would probably be easier to get a job after that. And yeah there are lots of scams out there but as long as it doesn't seem too good to be true, and you read all the reviews on the company then I'm sure you will be fine.
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    (Original post by Ciel.)
    What do you mean 'toxic'? I messed up, I admit but that doesn't really mean the whole relationship was toxic.I've lost interest in most of my hobbies to be honest (except for stuff that doesn't require any effort) and I'm not sure if I can get it back. I'm genuinely too tired for any sports/outdoor activities although I used to love them (probably because of anemia plus really underweight atm). I do have friends but I just can't bring myself to care about them anymore and I've distanced myself from them lately. So yeah.........That would be you I guess.
    They said your attitude was toxic.

    Toxic:
    http://www.heysigmund.com/toxic-people/
    http://www.talentedladiesclub.com/al...person-handle/
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    Thank god he hasn't forgiven you. He has sense.
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    (Original post by Tai Ga)
    Thank god he hasn't forgiven you. He has sense.
    He hasn't. Yet.

    Doesn't sound like me at all.
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    (Original post by Ciel.)
    Yeah well we are still living together but not sure for how much longer. Oh no, sorry to hear that you've anemia too! It sucks! Looks like you have some nice plans, though. Or maybe you could do some sort of IT course? It would probably be easier to get a job after that. And yeah there are lots of scams out there but as long as it doesn't seem too good to be true, and you read all the reviews on the company then I'm sure you will be fine.

    I made a mistake in my last reply where i thought the anonymous person had written that i was only sympathetic to you because of my medical history but i read it wrong anyway i do think pm'ing people is boring because it's by to read both good and bad or positive and negative replies and there are lots of people who have the same problem who can learn from reading it too

    Also i have done I T courses and i do'nt want to do any more as i know enough about computers. I was going to do a business course but i do'nt think i can cope with all the studying so i'm just going to do a fun course and something i have always wanted to do which is music course. When that finishes maybe i will go to another college to do a song writing course. If i had not chosen music i would do a course on making music instruments like guitar, violin or fx horror film make up course because i do'nt want to do boring, ordinary courses.

    Plus i'm trying to get away from the job centre because they love sending people on ridiculous employment courses that last 2 or 3 weeks from 9 30 to 4pm everyday and sometimes in a college so i would prefer to do something i actually want to do. The last time they sent me to college for 2 weeks just to apply for Argos. And every retail job you have to do 2 or 3 week course before you can apply for the job. Then after the course ends they make you do role playing and stand up presentations in a group in the job centre then only pick the people who were loud and talkative. So if you do have to end up going to the job centre you're going to have lots of fun being sent on endless meaningless courses so it's better to do full or part time college course you chose yourself.

    I do not want to go back to retail because the money is **** and sometimes having to deal with miserable customer's but i would only do it if i was in college just for the extra money. But after college i would rather work in trainee recruitment than retail because it pays more plus some companies pay for free holidays abroad and other perks. I'm not sure if i will like that but it's got to be better than retail.
    But to be honest i could'nt give a **** about getting a job unless it pays good money or i would like to start my own business one day and it does not include escort work like people think i just come on here to promote my own company or i get paid to promote other people's. Neither of those are true i just like telling people about certain jobs or different ways to make extra money if they are desperate or if they did not know about it before because i learn about a lot of things from reading people's threads when they mention jobs or anything.

    For example I wish someone had told me years ago how easy it is to get into recruitment especially if you have a degree so a year ago when i never got any replies before and no one was banging down my door to give me a job as soon as i decided to go back to college these stupid recruitment companies keep contacting me or asking me to do skype interviews. It would have been great 1 year ago but it's more important for me to go back to college first. I do not want the dilemma of which is the best one to choose and regretting my choice afterwards but if these recruitment and estate agents are contacting me when i do'nt have a degree then i'm sure i can still apply after college. Who knows i might even be in a different career after college ends.
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    (Original post by Judge Judy)
    I made a mistake in my last reply where i thought the anonymous person had written that i was only sympathetic to you because of my medical history but i read it wrong anyway i do think pm'ing people is boring because it's by to read both good and bad or positive and negative replies and there are lots of people who have the same problem who can learn from reading it too

    Also i have done I T courses and i do'nt want to do any more as i know enough about computers. I was going to do a business course but i do'nt think i can cope with all the studying so i'm just going to do a fun course and something i have always wanted to do which is music course. When that finishes maybe i will go to another college to do a song writing course. If i had not chosen music i would do a course on making music instruments like guitar, violin or fx horror film make up course because i do'nt want to do boring, ordinary courses.

    Plus i'm trying to get away from the job centre because they love sending people on ridiculous employment courses that last 2 or 3 weeks from 9 30 to 4pm everyday and sometimes in a college so i would prefer to do something i actually want to do. The last time they sent me to college for 2 weeks just to apply for Argos. And every retail job you have to do 2 or 3 week course before you can apply for the job. Then after the course ends they make you do role playing and stand up presentations in a group in the job centre then only pick the people who were loud and talkative. So if you do have to end up going to the job centre you're going to have lots of fun being sent on endless meaningless courses so it's better to do full or part time college course you chose yourself.

    I do not want to go back to retail because the money is **** and sometimes having to deal with miserable customer's but i would only do it if i was in college just for the extra money. But after college i would rather work in trainee recruitment than retail because it pays more plus some companies pay for free holidays abroad and other perks. I'm not sure if i will like that but it's got to be better than retail.
    But to be honest i could'nt give a **** about getting a job unless it pays good money or i would like to start my own business one day and it does not include escort work like people think i just come on here to promote my own company or i get paid to promote other people's. Neither of those are true i just like telling people about certain jobs or different ways to make extra money if they are desperate or if they did not know about it before because i learn about a lot of things from reading people's threads when they mention jobs or anything.

    For example I wish someone had told me years ago how easy it is to get into recruitment especially if you have a degree so a year ago when i never got any replies before and no one was banging down my door to give me a job as soon as i decided to go back to college these stupid recruitment companies keep contacting me or asking me to do skype interviews. It would have been great 1 year ago but it's more important for me to go back to college first. I do not want the dilemma of which is the best one to choose and regretting my choice afterwards but if these recruitment and estate agents are contacting me when i do'nt have a degree then i'm sure i can still apply after college. Who knows i might even be in a different career after college ends.
    Music sounds good. I mean, there's no point doing a course you don't enjoy so if music is something you're interested in, you should just go for it. I had an 'office' job (trainee solicitor) and I hated it.. now I regret ever doing law.
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    Cheat as much as you want i dont see what this issue is about people being monogamous all the time..if you wanna screw someone else go ahead not gonna die more power to you OP!
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    What's the reluctance to seek professional help? Diagnosis might be a long process..what you describe falls under many headings. Online support can be fab but it's no substitute for professional help to stabilise you and reduce the negative behaviours. You can't simply will mental health away. Just like you can't will away diabetes or a broken leg.
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    (Original post by MathsMPhys)
    Cheat as much as you want i dont see what this issue is about people being monogamous all the time..if you wanna screw someone else go ahead not gonna die more power to you OP!
    Lol......
    (Original post by ~Tara~)
    What's the reluctance to seek professional help? Diagnosis might be a long process..what you describe falls under many headings. Online support can be fab but it's no substitute for professional help to stabilise you and reduce the negative behaviours. You can't simply will mental health away. Just like you can't will away diabetes or a broken leg.
    Falls under many headings? What do you mean by that? Well, the reason why is because it just didn't work for me. Bad experience with antidepressants, bad experience with a psychiatrist. And now I feel like I don't even need it.
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    I meant that the symptoms you described could be any number of mental illnesses because the symptoms overlap on those disorders.

    If you really feel okay and don't need help any more than it's unlikely you had a mental illness in the first place. What I would say is don't judge the entire system on one bad psychiatrist. Fair enough of its made you hesitant to try again but there are many options available both within and outside the NHS
 
 
 
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