So fed up... :(

I've been with my other half just coming up to a year, but lately he's just making me feel so fed up. He's constantly getting into bad moods, like a grumpy old man! Whenever I get fed up of it and say it's not making me feel very nice, he just says I'm being horrible to him, when all I've said is that I'm finding it hard being talked to like that. I ask him what's wrong, but he says nothing. He's everything I could ever want and I love him to pieces, but he's just so damn grumpy lately and I'm finding it affecting me, I get on a downer or a low after talking to him. Like today, I had my drving test, and I didn't even get a congratulations, he was moody and grumpy and out of everyone seemed the least happy, if at all, on what has been one of my proudest moments :frown:

I talk to him all of the time, try and be understanding, but he's turning to be so rude, miserable and just hard to even speak to sometimes and he just won't listen and I'm fed up. What else can I do? :frown:

Reply 1

Necro Defain

11

Slap him!

Reply 2

emanuel_arsenalfc

11

you can always resort to not letting him have sex with you anymore..should shake him up
btw congratulations on ur driving :smile:

Reply 3

EmilyClare

Aw. He sounds RUBBISH

Seriously, a boyfriend is meant to make you feel good, right? So not even congratulating you on the driving test? sounds odd.

I'm going to be honest here and say that he's being very self centered- if you ask him to stop treating you like he is, then surely he should realise he's making mistakes, and not just tell you that you're being horribe to him (which i'm assuming you're not!) Instead of focusing on HIM and what he is doing wrong, he's trying to flip it to make you feel like you are doing something wrong :frown:

Do you feel like you're stuck in the relationship, cos it's been so long?

Reply 4

Anonymous #1

OP

emanuel_arsenalfc

you can always resort to not letting him have sex with you anymore..should shake him up
btw congratulations on ur driving :smile:

Aha, maybe that might be an option :p:

I've just sort of had enough, of his constant grumpy attitude.

Awww thank you! I'm so happy as it's taken me a while to learn and I've struggled a bit, so all the hard work has paid off :biggrin:

Reply 5

EmilyClare

Also well done on the driving test! :biggrin:

Reply 6

Anonymous #1

OP

EmilyClare

Aw. He sounds RUBBISH

Seriously, a boyfriend is meant to make you feel good, right? So not even congratulating you on the driving test? sounds odd.

I'm going to be honest here and say that he's being very self centered- if you ask him to stop treating you like he is, then surely he should realise he's making mistakes, and not just tell you that you're being horribe to him (which i'm assuming you're not!) Instead of focusing on HIM and what he is doing wrong, he's trying to flip it to make you feel like you are doing something wrong :frown:

Do you feel like you're stuck in the relationship, cos it's been so long?

Well lately he's being rubbish and I think he knows it. He keeps saying, oh me again screwing things up, making us not good etc, you're always right, or make yourself seem right etc.
Well he finely texted me back saying he was proud of me, but only after I saidhe didn't sound as though he was proud of me or was happy for me :frown:

Yeah you're right, he never seems to try and make things better, just sort of sulks about things feeling sorry for himself, and turns it around on me.
I sort of do and sort of don't. Were going to the same uni, his chocie not mine, if he had a choice he wouldnt go at all though as he's so lazy, so decided he might as well be near me :rolleyes:

But like, I really care for him as when he is nice, he can be so nice and perfect, but when he's like this, it really hurts you know :frown:

Reply 7

emanuel_arsenalfc

11

Anonymous

Aha, maybe that might be an option :p:

I've just sort of had enough, of his constant grumpy attitude.

Awww thank you! I'm so happy as it's taken me a while to learn and I've struggled a bit, so all the hard work has paid off :biggrin:

oh for sure..i mean hes going to be physically starved of pleasure so the grumpiness will leaaave.. remember u hav the vag..you're the boss :smile:

Reply 8

Anonymous #1

OP

EmilyClare

Also well done on the driving test! :biggrin:

Thank you

Everyone I know has been so happy for me, my friends and relatives have been great and supportive.... but sadly not him :frown:

Reply 9

Anonymous #1

OP

emanuel_arsenalfc

oh for sure..i mean hes going to be physically starved of pleasure so the grumpiness will leaaave.. remember u hav the vag..you're the boss :smile:

Haha, well he is coming to mine tomorrow :wink:

In all seriousness, he doesn't deserve anything of that sort right now anyway, so I miht well not give him any!

Reply 10

Anonymous #1

OP

Necro Defain

Slap him!

Do you think he needs one? :o:

Reply 11

EmilyClare

Oh crickey- same uni! That's going to be awkward if you split up!
HOWEVER... this could be a good opertunity to make him realise that if he wants to hold onto you then he really needs to make more effort. When you go out and make loads of new friends, then he may get jealous and realise he needs to up his game a bit!

ooh, a good idea if you don't know whether you want to break up could be to say to him that for the first few weeks of the new term you should not see each other, so that you can both go out and make lots of new friends. I know loads of poeple (though not necesserily bf and gf) who are doing this

Reply 12

Anonymous #1

OP

EmilyClare

Oh crickey- same uni! That's going to be awkward if you split up!
HOWEVER... this could be a good opertunity to make him realise that if he wants to hold onto you then he really needs to make more effort. When you go out and make loads of new friends, then he may get jealous and realise he needs to up his game a bit!

ooh, a good idea if you don't know whether you want to break up could be to say to him that for the first few weeks of the new term you should not see each other, so that you can both go out and make lots of new friends. I know loads of poeple (though not necesserily bf and gf) who are doing this

I don't want to split up with him as although he can be like this, we have some brilliant times together and he makes me really happy. He just seems to make me really happy or really unhappy that's the problem :frown:

I think it is a good idea actually. I was saying to him on the phone that I'd been speaking to people about how happy I was and one of the people I said was his friend who I was talking about cars too. He seemed jealous about it, so this might already be a problem he has?
That's not a bad idea. I think I'd try and see him a bit, but not go out of my way to make plans with him, so he can see what he's missing and I can make new friends etc. But I'm afraid this will make us grow apart. He was so horrible to me and said uni will either make or break us, as if he didn't even care whilst I sat there in tears as he said it :frown:

Reply 13

EmilyClare

woah- he just sat there while you WERE IN TEARS???????????

This guy sounds horrible :frown:

i'm sorry to say it but it's true.

Also if you grow apart then you will know that it wasn't meant to be. I think if it is meant to be then not seeing him for a few weeks shouldn't make a difference- and you'll both be so busy that you may not even have time to think bout it!

Reply 14

Anonymous #1

OP

EmilyClare

woah- he just sat there while you WERE IN TEARS???????????

This guy sounds horrible :frown:

i'm sorry to say it but it's true.

Also if you grow apart then you will know that it wasn't meant to be. I think if it is meant to be then not seeing him for a few weeks shouldn't make a difference- and you'll both be so busy that you may not even have time to think bout it!

I was on my bed crying, and then walked out after just having enough.
He said he wouldn't take back what he said because he thought it was true, and we believe in being honest with each other. Harsh I think :frown:

Also, I liked the idea of living together the first year at uni, but he had other ideas saying he 'wouldn't have fun if he lived with me' so I opted for halls seperately, as I had no choice, he was adament. Then he said, I'd like to in second year, as we would have the first year for getting new friends and a uni experience. We went on holiday and I saw so many nice things for our idea of living together, furnishings etc, which he agreed would be great. Then on the train home I said, oh you seem pretty keen on living together, have you thought anymore about it, casually, but then he turned around saying I was deciding things too quickly and he might move in with friends instead. That torn my heart a little bit :frown:

Reply 15

EmilyClare

Aw- my heart is going out to you <3 He is REALLY confusing!

Maybe just take it as it comes, and don't act to keen- it may scare him off? (although right now i think that would be a good thing)

Also, about the being honest thing, that's fair enough to a poiont, but tbh i think he is just plain rude.

Are you by any small chance going to sussex uni (cos i am!!!)

Also are your Halls going to be near each other?

Reply 16

Myth717

12

B1TCH slap him ?

Reply 17

Anonymous #1

OP

EmilyClare

Aw- my heart is going out to you <3 He is REALLY confusing!

Maybe just take it as it comes, and don't act to keen- it may scare him off? (although right now i think that would be a good thing)

Also, about the being honest thing, that's fair enough to a poiont, but tbh i think he is just plain rude.

Are you by any small chance going to sussex uni (cos i am!!!)

Also are your Halls going to be near each other?

Thank you aha! I'm so confused, this is meant to be a happy day for me! :confused:

Yeah I'm backing off, not texting him as much, letting him be, on the off chance he might come back down to reality and out of his backside....
I'm not unfortunately aha! Sussex is a lovely uni though, didn't do my course unfortuantely :frown:

We're in the same halls, but completely different blocks, so they are actually in seperate buildings, thankfullly :smile:

Reply 18

Anonymous #1

OP

Thanks for your help and comfort everyone, really appreciate it. Makes me feel like I'm not doing everything wrong or being horrible, as I do feel like I've been reasonable enough.
Goodnight all xxx :smile:

Reply 19

Anonymous #1

OP

Argh, he called me last night and was just so grumpy. I said to him, out of everyone, he seemed to not even care and be at all happy for me. He got so grouchy and was like ' but I do careeeee' in a horrible whiney voice. Then I said, stop making me feel so horrible on my best day so far, and was like 'I'm not being grumpy' which was obvious he was, so I just said listen to himself. We got off the phone, he was like, oh I'll just go then seen as I always do everything wrong, you just want a perfect boyfriend and I'm not good enough (feeling all sorry for himself). He knew he was wrong, but I got no apology, he knew I was ill (have a cold thing) but never said hope you feel better, still no real congratulations. Now, this was yesterday evening and I haven't heard from him since, no apology in a text, no 'hope you have a nice day' like he always would do, and now he's coming home later from his dad's then he originally told me. Selfish boyfriend :frown:

So fed up... :(

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