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When is a relationship a 'long-term' relationship?

Hi, just something I've wondered for a while...coz I know a relationship that's been going for say 3 weeks, would be a short-term relationship, and, say 5 years, would be a long term one...but for all those in the middle...where would you draw the line and say the relationship was a "long-term" one? Just wondering...any thoughts??

Reply 1

Devil Bunny

I would say a few years.

Reply 2

twiga

15

I'd say longer than a year, I class my relationship as being "long term", 2 yrs and coming up to 3 months :smile:

Reply 3

Lauren18

14

I think you just know whether you're in one or not. I don't know why everything couply has to be pinned to specific times. Some people sleep together within a week, others take many months. Some people say 'I love you' in a month, others don't say it for two years.

I don't think there is a cut-off point for being in a LTR, but I'd say once your with someone for a year or more, you know it's pretty serious. I'd be more bothered about how the two people in the relationship feel rather than the labels society would attach to them, though.

Reply 4

lady

i think that the the phrase "long term relationship" doesnt necessarily depend on the amount of time you have been with your partner, but instead how commited you are, and if you are planning to be still with the same person for the "long term". Obviously this kind of relationship usually grows over time, you don't instantly see yourself with that person for the rest of your life. I think this is why people sometimes confuse a "long term relationship" with a "long" relationship. Some people stay with a partner for a few years but never intend on spending their whole lives with them, or setting up a family with that person.
I think defining a relationship as "short term" just means that you see yourself as a kind of 'here and now' relationship, thinking about the present primarily, and not about spending your life with that person.
But thats only my opinion xxx

Reply 5

jbcubed3

1

I agree with <i>lady</i> in that it's more so between the two people whether or not it's a long term thing, perhaps something a couple decides after being together for a while. Knowing that both people'll be together and the feeling of eternity or everlasting (sorry for the cheesy) I feel suggests a long term.

Reply 6

pikaboo

13

lady

i think that the the phrase "long term relationship" doesnt necessarily depend on the amount of time you have been with your partner, but instead how commited you are, and if you are planning to be still with the same person for the "long term". Obviously this kind of relationship usually grows over time, you don't instantly see yourself with that person for the rest of your life. I think this is why people sometimes confuse a "long term relationship" with a "long" relationship. Some people stay with a partner for a few years but never intend on spending their whole lives with them, or setting up a family with that person.
I think defining a relationship as "short term" just means that you see yourself as a kind of 'here and now' relationship, thinking about the present primarily, and not about spending your life with that person.
But thats only my opinion xxx

That's just what I was thinking. But I'd add that I see long term couples as lasting longer than 18 months at least, after the initial romance period has worn off and you're really settling down to commitment.

Reply 7

xxSpicyChickenxx

9

seeing as my last boyfriend lasted 3 weeks for me it would be a wonder to make it to a mounth.. but it never seems to happen..

bloody mirror should never have smashed it!

Reply 8

joelava

I'd go for a yr or more

Reply 9

ciara

13

In my opinion it's definitely about intention rather than time spent together. If you know you are 100% committed to your partner and can see yourself together in the future, then that is long term.

My boyfriend and I have been together for 6 months and are going to have to break up for uni, but if that obstacle wasn't there I know we would stay together well into the future. I am definitely hoping to get back together with him afterwards.. not sure what to class that as!

Cxx

Reply 10

username21537

2

The transition to a long term relationship progresses as so
(from first person)
Single/Short term. The coat is My coat
Developing. The coat is A/The coat
Long term. The coat is Our coat.

Reply 11

Agrippina

15

ciara

are going to have to break up for uni, but if that obstacle wasn't there I know we would stay together well into the future. I am definitely hoping to get back together with him afterwards.. not sure what to class that as!

So if you're going to get back together with him afterwards, what's the point of breaking up in the first place?!

Reply 12

Agrippina

15

MR_JR

The transition to a long term relationship progresses as so
(from first person)
Single/Short term. The coat is My coat
Developing. The coat is A/The coat
Long term. The coat is Our coat.

Lol, that's so true. It's like that with my bf's car, I don't drive but we call it "our" car!

Reply 13

Carreh

2

MR_JR

The transition to a long term relationship progresses as so
(from first person)
Single/Short term. The coat is My coat
Developing. The coat is A/The coat
Long term. The coat is Our coat.

Tis true

Reply 14

SammyD

7

if you're still together after the first pregnancy scare it's going to be long term

Reply 15

juice

Lauren18

I think you just know whether you're in one or not. I don't know why everything couply has to be pinned to specific times. Some people sleep together within a week, others take many months. Some people say 'I love you' in a month, others don't say it for two years.

I don't think there is a cut-off point for being in a LTR, but I'd say once your with someone for a year or more, you know it's pretty serious. I'd be more bothered about how the two people in the relationship feel rather than the labels society would attach to them, though.

Fair play, and a bloody good point! I've been in my relationship for 18 months, but to be honest it felt long term at 3 months becasue it felt right - I knew it would go the distance. I've been in other relationships that were so hot and cold that it didn't feel like a LTR even after 2 years

When is a relationship a 'long-term' relationship?

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