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    I've reached a stage with this problem where I can't think of a single thing I can do to make it better. Please help.

    My group of about 8 friends has been quite close-knit for about 8 years.

    Two and a half years ago, I started going out with my boyfriend, John. At about the same time (I don't know whether it's related or not) our mutual friend, Sam, stopped talking to John. It's incredibly childish - John has tried his best, but Sam completely ignores him all the time. We moved away soon after we started going out, so this has made it worse - we don't see Sam often, but when we do, he persists with this stupid behaviour.

    Sam and I still have friendly chats when we see each other, as I refuse to get dragged into it.

    The point is, I have no idea what his problem is. Neither does John. I've asked another mutual friend, Gaz, what's going on and he says he doesn't know (but I'm sure he does). I also asked my best mate to do some detective work, but she had no luck.

    We're now thinking of moving back to where our friends live, but I really want to get this sorted out before we make the move, as it's really worrying me. John has said he's fed up of making all the effort and probably won't go out with our group of friends if we move back, as it's just too awkward.

    What can I do? Any ideas?
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    (Original post by Trousers)
    I've reached a stage with this problem where I can't think of a single thing I can do to make it better. Please help.

    My group of about 8 friends has been quite close-knit for about 8 years.

    Two and a half years ago, I started going out with my boyfriend, John. At about the same time (I don't know whether it's related or not) our mutual friend, Sam, stopped talking to John. It's incredibly childish - John has tried his best, but Sam completely ignores him all the time. We moved away soon after we started going out, so this has made it worse - we don't see Sam often, but when we do, he persists with this stupid behaviour.

    Sam and I still have friendly chats when we see each other, as I refuse to get dragged into it.

    The point is, I have no idea what his problem is. Neither does John. I've asked another mutual friend, Gaz, what's going on and he says he doesn't know (but I'm sure he does). I also asked my best mate to do some detective work, but she had no luck.

    We're now thinking of moving back to where our friends live, but I really want to get this sorted out before we make the move, as it's really worrying me. John has said he's fed up of making all the effort and probably won't go out with our group of friends if we move back, as it's just too awkward.

    What can I do? Any ideas?
    Maybe Sam likes you and is jealous of John?!
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    Hmm.. Well Firstly I think yuo really need to talk to sam about why he is being that way towards John, Because theor msut be a reason. Surely If he values your friendship he will At least make an effort with yourboyfriend, Ive found it so much better to get on with your friends other halves.
    Tell Sam what this is doing to myou, and he should see that his act is hurting you just as much as John.
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    Sorry, I should have made it more clear - John is one of the group of friends, so Sam knew him for ages before we started going out. He knows us both equally well.
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    (Original post by Trousers)
    Sorry, I should have made it more clear - John is one of the group of friends, so Sam knew him for ages before we started going out. He knows us both equally well.
    Still, he might be secretly attracted to you or something like that?

    Have you asked him outright, or just gone through friends?
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    (Original post by Eeyore)
    Maybe Sam likes you and is jealous of John?!
    I've been thinking that, and I know Sam used to fancy me (about 4 years ago), but how would that justify not talking to one of your friends for two and a half years?!?!?!

    Hanzing, I know the obvious solution is to talk to him, but he's hardly likely to tell me the truth. He knows I'll tell John, apart from anything else.
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    Hmm Tricky. Well Maybe you jsut have to move back and start to not worry about his feelings.. That sounds harsh But I mean If hes not being Fair if your worrying weather you can all go out together. Is it possible they just going to have to live with each other and get over it.. But He could still have feelings for you, these things can last for years.
 
 
 
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