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    I'm unemployed and graduated this year. I'm living at home on jobseekers. At first I didn't pay any rent but my dad was just bullying me and being really nasty demanding if "I've got a job yet?" three times a day and marching into my room to demand it.

    I eventually offered to pay £30 a week (what my sister who has a full time job pays my mother - different house) to just stop it. I pay all my personal bills, internet etc.

    It has now been 3 months of living on £15 a week and I'm getting really fed up of it because I can't live a life at all - catching the train for a job interview this week left me with £9! - so I offered to work 1 hour a day around the house (it is filthy, untidy and cold here - he has a lodger and my dad doesn't even clean anything but thinks it's okay to charge the lodger a lot of rent?!) and he said he'll get back to me on it.

    A few days later and the food has ran out in the house and he told me to pay rent or go hungry. He won't even discuss my offer. I really hate this selfish **** as I offered to begin paying in the first place just to stop him making me feel like crap all the time. Every time I offer to do something around the house he demands more and more. It got to the point I was doing 4 hours work around the house (trying to do it up) a day and he kept demanding more each day. I just don't know what to do - I'm fed up of living on nothing and I feel he is really treating me like ****. Am I being unreasonable in thinking £30/week on someone unemployed and 20k in debt is very harsh and unfair? Is there anyone in a similar situation on here?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I'm unemployed and graduated this year. I'm living at home on jobseekers. At first I didn't pay any rent but my dad was just bullying me and being really nasty demanding if "I've got a job yet?" three times a day and marching into my room to demand it.

    I eventually offered to pay £30 a week (what my sister who has a full time job pays my mother - different house) to just stop it. I pay all my personal bills, internet etc.

    It has now been 3 months of living on £15 a week and I'm getting really fed up of it because I can't live a life at all - catching the train for a job interview this week left me with £9! - so I offered to work 1 hour a day around the house (it is filthy, untidy and cold here - he has a lodger and my dad doesn't even clean anything but thinks it's okay to charge the lodger a lot of rent?!) and he said he'll get back to me on it.

    A few days later and the food has ran out in the house and he told me to pay rent or go hungry. He won't even discuss my offer. I really hate this selfish **** as I offered to begin paying in the first place just to stop him making me feel like crap all the time. Every time I offer to do something around the house he demands more and more. It got to the point I was doing 4 hours work around the house (trying to do it up) a day and he kept demanding more each day. I just don't know what to do - I'm fed up of living on nothing and I feel he is really treating me like ****. Am I being unreasonable in thinking £30/week on someone unemployed and 20k in debt is very harsh and unfair? Is there anyone in a similar situation on here?
    Your parents are paying far more than £30/wk on you, I bet. And why should they? You are an able graduate in your 20s - why should they pay for you?

    Believe me, getting a job is not that hard if you actually look properly. How many applications are you sending out a day? 1,2, or 50? The job market has certainly improved in the last few months where I live, so get of your ass and do something
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    I think he is being very fair. He is doing it because YOU NEED TO GET A JOB! Don't be a lazy bum that claims benefits. What are you doing with your life?!!!!!!

    I would do exactly the same to my children (if/when I have them). 3 months of not working is a long time. And its true, he probably does spend more than £30 on you.

    He is teaching you to understand the value of money. I would respect him for that. I know he has gotten angry with you, but thats probably out of frustration. If you decided not to work and go traveling, or do some voluntary work to gain experience or help others, then I don't think he would complain. You would actually be doing something productive with your life, other than sitting around.
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    I was on JSA for 4 months when I was 18 and still paid my parents rent out of that money. Looking back I'm glad they did it, it taught me the value of money and really spurred me on to get a job.
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    Claim Housing Benefit and state that you pay £30/week rent. You might need to call the council and find out how it works if your landlord is your parent. My partner and I were both on JSA and got our rent paid in full by the council until we both started work/postgrad studies.

    Finding a job is hard and takes a really long time, so I think the above posts are a little harsh - but on the other hand it isn't your dad's responsibility to pay your way now you're an adult, especially if he doesn't have enough money to buy food?

    I hope in this situation you're not only applying for graduate fulltime work, because even part-time bar work would give you ~£100/week to play with.
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    Move in with your mum and sister?
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    Well, it really depends on how you treat your "current accommodation"... You mentioned that you did some work around the house in return for living there so obviously you don't treat the house as "your home" but as a rented place and therefore you should pay the rent.

    If I didn't have a job and lived with my mum then I'm sure she would not expect me to pay any rent but then again, I would do my best to help her with the housework (tidy, cook dinner, take dogs for a walk etc.) in between my job interviews.
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    (Original post by _findthecolour_)
    Claim Housing Benefit and state that you pay £30/week rent. You might need to call the council and find out how it works if your landlord is your parent. My partner and I were both on JSA and got our rent paid in full by the council until we both started work/postgrad studies.

    Finding a job is hard and takes a really long time, so I think the above posts are a little harsh - but on the other hand it isn't your dad's responsibility to pay your way now you're an adult, especially if he doesn't have enough money to buy food?

    I hope in this situation you're not only applying for graduate fulltime work, because even part-time bar work would give you ~£100/week to play with.
    The last time I looked you can't claim housing benefit if you're living with one or both parents. They might have changed it but I really don't think they would have.
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    I think he's being a bit unreasonable tbh. If you're actively looking for a job then he shouldn't be forcing you to pay so much. But then again if you've just sat on your arse lettting JSA do the work then he might have a point.
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    OP, why don't you look into moving out? As I said, if you're under 25 and on JSA then the council will pay your rent for you until you find work. So you'll have your ~£50 to live on from JSA and no rent to pay.

    Might be a bit screwed when it comes to paying bills though.

    Have a think about and then have another think about how unfair you think your dad is being. Saying that, my mum would basically have me live with her forever without paying rent if I needed to I think (not that I do). Spoilt.
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    Why is everyone being so harsh? :lolwut: Its not like he isnt looking for jobs. I think its really mean of his dad to expect him to pay rent, when he is unemployed yet actively seeking work.
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    I reckon your dad is really harsh
    You never said why you are unemployed though?
    Are you trying to look for a job?
    It looks like your dad isn't going to change his ways... I would just try and move out as much as possible tbh.
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    I think your dad is too harsh... He may want to teach you the value of money, but he shouldn't forget that you're his son and be a little bit more understanding.

    (Original post by x-pri-x)
    Move in with your mum and sister?
    This, if you mum has a spare room or something.

    Hope things work out for you.
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    (Original post by SomeStudent)
    I think your dad is too harsh... He may want to teach you the value of money, but he shouldn't forget that you're his son and be a little bit more understanding.


    This, if you mum has a spare room or something.

    Hope things work out for you.
    This :yy:
 
 
 
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