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    okay, seeing that the other joke thread here seems to be chuck full of dirty jokes etc., this is a thread for clean jokes - and any dirty jokes get repped here by yours truly.

    so, to start.

    A blind guy on a bar stool shouts to the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?"
    In a hushed voice, the guy next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, you should know something. Our bartender IS blonde and the bouncer is blonde. I'm a 6' tall blonde, 200 lb black belt. The guy sitting next to me is a blonde, 6' 2, weighs 225 and he's a rugby player. The fella to your right is 6' 5" pushing 300 and he's a wrestler. Each one of US is blonde. Think about it, Mister. You still wanna tell that joke?"
    The blind guy says, "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
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    Hah, that's good.
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    i heard that joke yesterday, how weird is that?
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    Why did the chiken cross the road?
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    Tony Blair.
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    ohh sorry clean jokes
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    this joke isnt dirty but a bit nasty... actually its fine

    what was princess diana's favourite yoghurt??
    a crunch corner!
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    y clean !
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    why did the charv cross the road?

    Spoiler:
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    to start a fight with a random stranger
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    (Original post by MorbidAngel)
    why did the charv cross the road?

    to start a fight with a random stranger
    :rofl: that was great
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    (Original post by telecastro_59)
    :rofl: that was great
    it was posted on here a while back. there was a thread of charv jokes
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    (Original post by MorbidAngel)
    it was posted on here a while back. there was a thread of chav jokes
    well, i'll look it up
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    hmm i didnt know that there were many clean jokes
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    (Original post by HearTheThunder)
    ohh sorry clean jokes
    Oh ha ha. I love it. the best one I've heard today!!!
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    (Original post by pete77)
    y clean !
    cos I don't like ones that are all putrid and full of weird sex and that.
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    well on the subject of cross the road jokes, you have:

    Why did the rabbit cross the road?
    - to show his girlfriend he had guts.

    Why did the skeleton cross the road?
    - cause he hadn't any brains.

    And on a more sensible footing...

    How does an attorney sleep?
    First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.

    How many lawyer jokes are there?
    Only three. The rest are true stories.

    How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?
    You won't find a lawyer who can change a light bulb.

    How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?
    Three. One to climb the ladder. One to shake it. And one to sue the ladder company.

    What are lawyers good for?
    They make used car salesmen look good.

    What do you call a lawyer gone bad?
    Senator.

    What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50?
    Your Honour.

    What do you get when you cross a bad politician with a crooked lawyer?
    Chelsea.

    What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?
    His partners. An anvil.

    What happens when you cross a pig with a lawyer?
    Nothing. There are some things a pig won't do.

    What's the difference between a lawyer and a liar?
    The pronunciation.

    What's the difference between a lawyer and an onion?
    You cry when you cut up an onion.

    What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?
    The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.

    Why did God create snakes just before lawyers?
    To practice.

    Though on second thoughts, they're not really SENSIBLE...
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    (Original post by lesser weevil)
    well on the subject of cross the road jokes, you have:

    Why did the rabbit cross the road?
    - to show his girlfriend he had guts.
    Now, now, that's hardly clean is it?
    Love the lawyer jokes though.

    Rebecca
 
 
 
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