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    I'm not sure where this should go so I'm going to try in here.

    Earlier this year I agreed to move in with my best friend, as she won't have anywhere to live at the start of September when she goes to uni (long story that I can't really repeat), she's going to the local uni and I'm staying on at sixth form for another year. We also asked my BF to move in with us to ease the pressure on the rent, the average rent for a 2/3 bedroom flat is £450 where we live, so that means about £150 each a month, with bills etc on top.

    The upshot is that I don't think I can afford it any more as I also have to save for uni next year, but I can't bear to let her down. I'd have to be earning about £600 a month to make it viable and, again, I don't think I'll be able to do that and put the necessary effort into my studies to get the grades I need for uni

    What can I do? An idea at the moment is to pay my part of the rent and live at home in the week and stay there when I need to stop over in the city but I really don't know how she's gpoing to take it, anyone have any suggestions?
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    I presume for whatever reason she hasn't/can't get a place in halls/stay at home. However I am sure if she talks to the uni they will help put her in touch with other students who need to flat share or be able to provide some answers for accom. They may also be able to help her out financially.
    Does she know anyone else she could maybe move in with, if only for a while, or have any family that can help her out? If you can't afford it and you think it will interfere with your studies too much it's probably not a good idea to move in because in the end you might resent her.

    just my 2 cents

    good luck with the prob x
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    I guess you gotta talk to her and sort this out, or it may become more difficult as September draws closer. Whatever your decision is you can't really let it affect your studies especially. Maybe try to find a job that you could attend after school or during one of the weekend days that won't eat into your study/relaxation time too much. Maybe trying to get a job with her or your bf could be a good idea?

    Whatever happens, good luck
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    (Original post by marisad_uk)
    I presume for whatever reason she hasn't/can't get a place in halls/stay at home. However I am sure if she talks to the uni they will help put her in touch with other students who need to flat share or be able to provide some answers for accom. They may also be able to help her out financially.
    Does she know anyone else she could maybe move in with, if only for a while, or have any family that can help her out? If you can't afford it and you think it will interfere with your studies too much it's probably not a good idea to move in because in the end you might resent her.

    just my 2 cents

    good luck with the prob x
    She's getting loads in grants etc, she worked out about £5000, and she's planning to get a job too so although money will be tight she should be ok.

    Do you think living there part time, i.e. staying there when I've been working (I work in a bar in the city and live a long way from the city) and still paying my 1/3 of the rent would be acceptable? This would stop me from having to work so many hours and she'd still have 1/3 of the rent being paid.
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    (Original post by twiga)
    She's getting loads in grants etc, she worked out about £5000, and she's planning to get a job too so although money will be tight she should be ok.

    Do you think living there part time, i.e. staying there when I've been working (I work in a bar in the city and live a long way from the city) and still paying my 1/3 of the rent would be acceptable? This would stop me from having to work so many hours and she'd still have 1/3 of the rent being paid.
    I don't think you should have to a 1/3rd of the rent if you're not going to be living there most the time. What about your boyfriend? Is he still moving in?
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    (Original post by ~Sam~)
    I don't think you should have to a 1/3rd of the rent if you're not going to be living there most the time. What about your boyfriend? Is he still moving in?
    As far as I know he is, I haven't discussed this with them yet, my parents still don't know about the plans to move out either.

    The rent issue is only fair as they will really struggle if it's just the 2 of them, and with me paying 1/3 I would still be able to stay round there when I needed to, but also have the security of a home environment. I also have to take into account that I'll be having to pay a lot for uni interviews next year - these won't be cheap.
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    (Original post by twiga)
    As far as I know he is, I haven't discussed this with them yet, my parents still don't know about the plans to move out either.

    The rent issue is only fair as they will really struggle if it's just the 2 of them, and with me paying 1/3 I would still be able to stay round there when I needed to, but also have the security of a home environment. I also have to take into account that I'll be having to pay a lot for uni interviews next year - these won't be cheap.
    But if you're paying 1/3rd of the rent, surely you wont save money by living at home? Or do you mean it will be cheaper cos you have have to pay for bills, food, etc?
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    (Original post by ~Sam~)
    But if you're paying 1/3rd of the rent, surely you wont save money by living at home? Or do you mean it will be cheaper cos you have have to pay for bills, food, etc?
    I won;t have to buy a computer, pay for bills or food, I might still get an allowence off my parents (unlikely, but positive thinking!),, they will also pay for any travel to uni interviews etc and my contact lenses. I'd also be able to run a car providing I pass my test soon.
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    Be honest with her as soon as possible. She maybe annoyed to begin with but she has to appreciate you have your studies to think about too.
    Again she should contatc the uni and get them to help her to find accomodation.
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    Thanks for all the advice guys, I just spoke to her and she's not angry at all, we're going to try and sort something out that will work for all 3 of us, the qustion though is what? Lol why is life so complicated?
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    (Original post by twiga)
    Thanks for all the advice guys, I just spoke to her and she's not angry at all, we're going to try and sort something out that will work for all 3 of us, the qustion though is what? Lol why is life so complicated?
    That's good to hear

    Maybe you guys could get loans/help with accomodation or take out part-time jobs near to your school/flat to cover the costs. Maybe, if possible, speak to your school/college to get advice on what options you could have, and things you could do to cover the rent. Maybe your boyfriend could help pay part of your share, or possibly the costs of the flat reduced if you and him share a room instead of 3 sep rooms?

    Good luck
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    (Original post by frost105)
    Be honest with her as soon as possible. She maybe annoyed to begin with but she has to appreciate you have your studies to think about too.
    Again she should contatc the uni and get them to help her to find accomodation.
    I agree completely...there is nothing worse than dropping someone in it at the last minute. It might be a bit awkard, but tell her ASAP. Oh and be honest...no point making up stories about it because that could just make it worse.
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    (Original post by NikNak)
    I agree completely...there is nothing worse than dropping someone in it at the last minute. It might be a bit awkard, but tell her ASAP. Oh and be honest...no point making up stories about it because that could just make it worse.
    Yep, she told her today

    I've gotta think about accomodation also for this September, the best way I think is to probably use part of a loan initially and try to get a job to cover a majority of the rent and living expenses (food, hygenic stuff, cosmetics etc).
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    Nice one I just know from first-hand experience that it isn't nice if you arn't told until the last minute.
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    (Original post by jbcubed3)
    That's good to hear

    Maybe you guys could get loans/help with accomodation or take out part-time jobs near to your school/flat to cover the costs. Maybe, if possible, speak to your school/college to get advice on what options you could have, and things you could do to cover the rent. Maybe your boyfriend could help pay part of your share, or possibly the costs of the flat reduced if you and him share a room instead of 3 sep rooms?

    Good luck
    We were going to have a room for her, a room for me and my bf and a room to use as a study where we could keep all our books etc. It's lookng more likely now that I'll divide my time between home and the flat, pay my share of the rent but by living at home I'll avoid a lot of expenses e.g. food, bills, contact lens money, and I'll also be able to run a car (useful when those 2 want to get places :p: )
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    That's a good idea - you think though that you should pay a bit less because you're not going to be there most of the time, if your flatmates'll understand?
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    (Original post by jbcubed3)
    That's a good idea - you think though that you should pay a bit less because you're not going to be there most of the time, if your flatmates'll understand?
    Maybe it could be my contribution to the bills as well? That way it would be fair (I think) as when I'm there I'll be using electricity, water etc. I don;t want to leave them in the lurch and I want to pay my way.
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    there's still a few months til september - tell her now and she can advertise for another flatmate. As someone else said, it'd be a good idea to talk to the uni as they will help put her in touch with people.

    i can't help but think she'd be better off with someone else paying full rent than you paying 1/3 rent, not to mention that would be a huge burden on you in your final year of school.
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    I'm sorry I haven't explained the situation very well:

    Plan - me, my bf, and my friend all move in together paying 1/3 of the rent each

    I don't think I'll be able to afford this, I can't guarantee the £600 a month needed to make it work

    Proposed solution - bf and friend move in, I stay at home most niights but stay there if I need to stay in the city.

    - we still pay 1/3 of the rent each even thoigh I'm not living there full time.
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    If you can't afford it, don't do it. You may be a great friend, but you can't take such actions if you are not fully commited. You need to earn at least double the amount of you rent, or is it triple, i can't remember.

    Isn't it better if your friend went to the university and asked them to help her find a shared flat (which will probably be cheaper for her) or she can advertise for flatmates in the local paper, university pin boards. All universities have a place where other students are looking for flatmates.

    Don't disadvantage yourself to help a friend for a decision as big as this.
 
 
 
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