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My Sri Lankan Girlfriend's Parents

My girlfriend and i have been seeing each other for what's nearly 3/4 of a year now. and to cut it short I've never been so happy in my life before and i know it's all because of her. I just cherish everyday we have together. And as far as i know the feeling is completely mutual.

My girlfriend is Sri Lankan-born, though she's spent most of her life in England and has therefore adopted many of the 'western' standpoints on issues such as dating and what to look for in a partner. However her parents are still fairly traditional in some ways, dating anyone that's not sri lankan being one of them.

Despite this we have continued to see each other in secret from her family which has lead to tough points in our otherwise perfect relationship. I am also worried about what the consequences our relationship will have on hers with her parents.

I totally understand her parents point of view. Which makes me question that even despite our love, is seeing each other is right? Any honest advice would be greatly appreciated. Particularly if you have had such an experience yourself.

Reply 1

Sanjetti

If I may ask, do you know if she's a sri lankan tamil, or a sinhalese?

Reply 2

bigman_ben

If a white family said that about dating outside their race, they'd automatically be branded BNP supporting nazi racists.

Reply 3

Psycho0101

Why do you care about her parents? It's not like you're going to marry her.

Reply 4

Bagration

You have to use your charm, wit, and intelligence to persuade them. My (English) grandparents were very racist but were so impressed with my father consented for him to marry their daughter and basically turned them anti-racist.

Reply 5

Playboy King

You've only been together for just under a year now, you're young just enjoy it...no need to get all serious involving parents and all that drama, it's not like you're marrying her right now!
Anyway, the chances of you guys breaking up are quite high because this stuff is innevitable...every teen relationship has that whole ''it's the happiest i've ever been'' and they all think their partners are 'the one' but eventually it ends. I'd give it more time if I were you, until then enjoy it!

Reply 6

Jelkin

I think it's horribly unreasonable for her parents to bring her up in England but expect her not to date English boyos.*

Anyway, it's her decision to put her relationship with her parents at risk - the most you can do is check with her that she's okay with it. Otherwise, don't even think about it and just enjoy yourselves!

*"boyos" was a typo, but I liked it.

anon fail

bigman_ben

If a white family said that about dating outside their race, they'd automatically be branded BNP supporting nazi racists.

ahh

Reply 9

SleepyGrad

Anonymous

Congratulations on your relationship, sounds as if you have something really good there. If it were me, I would just try to carry on as best I could. Your girlfriend is with you, you need to respect her choice and accept that she wants to be with you even though it may make things hard for her with her parents, either now or later on. I'm sure you worry about her and sympathize, but it's not your job to take responsibility for her relationship with her parents.

Good luck - her parents may change their minds as the two of you get older (not uncommon in my experience with friends of mine whose parents wouldn't let them date guys from other races when we were in school, but who've now accepted these men into their families because they realized the relationship was strong).

Reply 10

Psycho0101

Playboy King

I agree with this. :yep:

Reply 11

Nathan-Jones

I say Shakespeare should make a play out of this. :yep:

Reply 12

TinTin:-p

Well don't get me wrong, but Sri Lankans have nothing against White People.
It's just that our culture is that we love one person and marry that person. And stick around with them for the rest of our lives.
The only reason Sri Lankan Parents hate the idea of white/srilankan relationship is because white people don't have the same controll/ culture.
but there are people who actually married white people and they stay together.
I'm a tamil sri lankan myself.
I had lots of crushes on white guyes but I fell in love with a sri lankan guy. cause i am very possesive and he feels the same about me.
I fell in love with him when I was 14. I've been with him for six years now. and we are getting married after my uni graduation. we have our ups n douwns arguments fell apart etc... but we allways find our ways back to each other.
so you can't allways say that teenage love never lasts.
You might think where is the fun in just being with one person.
but if you have had the experience then you would understand. and you would love the concept of having a girl/guy who was and will only be your's . I think you would understand where I'm getting at.