The Student Room Group

Alcoholism

Hey. I need help from anyone who has any ideas about how to deal with my mum. Shes an alcoholic, but not only this, she drinks in secret and seems to think none of us in the family know about it. She's also a serial liar, for example she tells everyone she has quit smoking and then smokes in secret too. She is really bad at covering it and the drinking up and lies to our faces and denies she does anything like that. It might not seem like a massive problem but it makes living at home so difficult sometimes. She get very argumentative with anyone she can wen she has been drinking, is often an embarassment in front of guests and can very easily evenings out by starting arguments, and thats including occasions like birthdays! Is anyone else in a similar situation to me and not know wot to do? Anyone been through this and got it sorted out? Any advice at all would be great cos i havent a clue! Thanks x
Reply 1
angeldelight
Hey. I need help from anyone who has any ideas about how to deal with my mum. Shes an alcoholic, but not only this, she drinks in secret and seems to think none of us in the family know about it. She's also a serial liar, for example she tells everyone she has quit smoking and then smokes in secret too. She is really bad at covering it and the drinking up and lies to our faces and denies she does anything like that. It might not seem like a massive problem but it makes living at home so difficult sometimes. She get very argumentative with anyone she can wen she has been drinking, is often an embarassment in front of guests and can very easily evenings out by starting arguments, and thats including occasions like birthdays! Is anyone else in a similar situation to me and not know wot to do? Anyone been through this and got it sorted out? Any advice at all would be great cos i havent a clue! Thanks x


I've never been in this situation, and the only friend I know who has has not been able to sort it out. The only thing I can suggest is that maybe you could try an intervention. If you and a lot of her close family and friends sat her down and explained that you're worried about her, you know she smokes and drinks and you want to help her to stop, it might make her realise it's not just her she's hurting. It may also help her stop doing things in secret.

It's really up to her to stop doing these things, and you can't do it for her. Showing her that you're there for her and want to help is the best you can do, and may well work.
i know exactly what your going through, pm me if you wanna chat :smile:
Reply 3
after 17 years of being depressed about both my parents drinking problems and letting it affect me i realised that i couldnt do anything about it. dont try and control anybody in life and try and change them (apart from maybe ur kids when ur older) because you wont succeed and ull just end up unhappy when u fail once again. love ur mum, uve only got one, but accept that these are her problems and even if u can encourage her etc.. at the end of the day its her problems and u cant do much about it. learn from her mistakes and focus on urself
Reply 4
you are not the only one. feel free to PM