The Student Room Group

Boyfriend problems

Very quick background:
been with bf two months, we left uni on sunday, he's going away for 6 weeks on friday. Didn't see him much during exams but saw him after.

Anyway. I text him sunday night to say i was upset about leaving uni and missing all my friends; he sent me a lovely text back saying "hugs and kisses". I text him last night to ask if he wanted me to visit (he lives 45 min drive from me at home) before he went away, but that it would have to be tomorrow. Got no reply, but it was quite late. Text him again at about 12:30 today saying I could do today because things changed, then text him at 3 asking him to let me know asap in case I need the car. Still no reply.

He could have run outta credit, he might not have his phone with him, and he has also said there is a problem with it where it doesn't ring for some reason. It's happened three times before where he's run outta money.

Anyway, I'm impatient and I'm getting pissed off. What's my best course of action? Call him later? I don't want to appear obsessive but if I don't ask my dad for the car today then I might not be able to get it.

Scroll to see replies

ring him????
Reply 2
If you do ring him, I'd ring him at home. Do you have his home number? Good luck!
Reply 3
Take the car and surprise him??
*Comes to senses* Do try calling again first and then go go go...
Reply 4
If you ring him, ring him at home or withhold your number...just in case hes avoiding speaking to you (i'm not saying that he is BTW) :smile:
Reply 5
i dont have his home number and the problem is, his phone is broken and doesn't ring. he's missed a lot of my calls this way, when i know for a fact he was waiting for them! but i'll try ringing him. what time do you reckon? i'm not gonna go see him tonight. i'm too tired. so i only have tomorrow.
Reply 6
11am??
If you know when he is leaving, try to arrive a few hours well several hours before - that would be a nice surprise, plus if you cannot get in contact...would he mind?
Reply 7
ok finally he texted back, apparently his phone is really messed up. what do you reckon? i'm not good at this trust thing.

i don't know when he leaves but i'm in work during the day so tomorrow evening is the only possibly time for me.
Reply 8
What did he say?
As far as I'm aware, you've already asked him if he want's to meet up by text.
Reply 9
YAY
That sounds great - go for it, you will not be seeing him for a while, if you can make it for the evening, super dooper and it seems quite genuine to me. But obviously you know him better and so go with what you feel. Trust is your friend =0)
Reply 10
Lauren
ok finally he texted back, apparently his phone is really messed up. what do you reckon? i'm not good at this trust thing.

Well if you've witnessed it ****ing up before it'd seem slightly rash to assume it works again at home. Then again a couple of weeks ago you were going to dump him and now you're not trusting him and being paranoid, I'm not sure I quite understand your relationship.
Ask for his home number and ring him to talk, text is a rubbish way of organising things.

A.
Reply 11
he said tomorrow is good but he'll be packing so he can't see me for that long. i'm debating whether an hour there and an hour back is worth it.

i'm not paranoid...i just dislike being ignored - he could be in trouble or something. or he could be wanting to dump me but not tell me. i wouldn't be too bothered if we split up. i'm just a text freak and when i ask a yes/no question i want it answered! lol.

alaric you must think really badly of me and my relationships cos you always read my problems!!!
Reply 12
If it was me debating wether it was worth it, I'd ask myself if he'd spend two hours traveling to come and see me. If I didn't think he would, I'd probarbly not bother. But if I thought he would, I'd probarbly be up for it. best wishes
erm, i have to say, it's not much of a relationship without trust. If you have issues there then i understand that, but you both need to work through them together, without you jumping to conclusions everytime he's delayed on a text back when you know he has a knackered phone. It's a good way to get rid of him, not keep him. Sorry if that sounds a little nasty, but its the truth. And if your serious about him, then an hour there and then back again with only ten minutes together shouldnt be a problem, you wont be seeing him in how long?
But thats just my opinion
Reply 14
Personally I'd leave it. I've made this mistake before, and if he's not enthusiastic to see you then it's probably a bad idea. Worse, if he says he's not got long. You'll just end up disappointed that he won't spend more time with you...
Reply 15
:eek: my god, you are so suspicious! You keep him on a tight leash don't you?
Reply 16
i dont think he's cheating on me. i just dont think he's interested in me. but on saturday night we stayed up all night talking about random stuff, telling each other everything about ourselves, and we got pretty close, but i just keep thinking "why would someone like him be interested in me?". i've put on some weight recently and feel fat and ugly.

i guess if he wants to stay together even though he's going away, and he doesn't want to cheat on me, then he must want me...although i find it hard to believe.
Reply 17
hey,
im goin thru the same problem.....my bf doesnt text for days at a time...tis gotten to the stage where its upsetting me so much that we are on the verge of splitting up....i think, the fact that he sent you a nice msg b4 this is a good sign, he cud just be dead busy...dont forget that nice msg...least it shows he cares
Lauren
i dont think he's cheating on me. i just dont think he's interested in me. but on saturday night we stayed up all night talking about random stuff, telling each other everything about ourselves, and we got pretty close, but i just keep thinking "why would someone like him be interested in me?". i've put on some weight recently and feel fat and ugly.

i guess if he wants to stay together even though he's going away, and he doesn't want to cheat on me, then he must want me...although i find it hard to believe.


I think you need to decide what you want out of the relationship.

MB
Reply 19
Lauren
i dont think he's cheating on me. i just dont think he's interested in me. but on saturday night we stayed up all night talking about random stuff, telling each other everything about ourselves, and we got pretty close, but i just keep thinking "why would someone like him be interested in me?". i've put on some weight recently and feel fat and ugly.

i guess if he wants to stay together even though he's going away, and he doesn't want to cheat on me, then he must want me...although i find it hard to believe.


I think you need to have more confidence in yourself woman :smile:

Your boyfriend sounds like he loves you. If you're insecure, I say talk to him. Tell him. Whatever it is, your bf sees something in you that he sees in no other girl and he loves you for who you are :smile: don't worry about it. Have a nice time with your bf if you go up btw :smile: