confused sexuality wise

i've recently found myself feeling more comfortable in guy clothes and often have tried on my brother's things when he is out, i fantasise about other girls and i'm not sure what to do, i found out my bf was cheating on me with another guy so i'm wondering if it is ok to make a move on a friend of ours - she says she's liked me a long time now even though me and my bf are officially ok again. now do you think its ok to experiment with other girls and my gender indentity without him knowing as i need to find out but i'm afraid what people will think of me as he said the guy came onto him not the other way round. does anyone also know how much gender change operations cost and how i might further investigate this path?

Reply 1

Mark S

17

Transexual pornography may alter your mind? Try it.

Reply 2

Dramatic Star

2

You said you've "recently found" yourself interested in girls & in being a guy.... you've got to be sure this isn't jsut a phase. It sounds like you have had a bad experience with a guy, make sure this isn't a short term reaction to the situation. If it isn't then fine, be true to yourself but having a gender change operation is a huge step. Give it a few years. If you are confused with your sexuality- then review it. Are you still attracted to guys or jsut girls?

Reply 3

SciFi25

1

Lirael Abhorsen

i've recently found myself feeling more comfortable in guy clothes and often have tried on my brother's things when he is out, i fantasise about other girls and i'm not sure what to do, i found out my bf was cheating on me with another guy so i'm wondering if it is ok to make a move on a friend of ours - she says she's liked me a long time now even though me and my bf are officially ok again. now do you think its ok to experiment with other girls and my gender indentity without him knowing as i need to find out but i'm afraid what people will think of me as he said the guy came onto him not the other way round. does anyone also know how much gender change operations cost and how i might further investigate this path?

Woah, thats a pretty heavy issue. Maybe you should try talking to some of the girls in the LGBT society, they can probably help you alot with the sexuality issue. As for the gender issue, just cause you might be bi and enjoy cross dessing does not mean you should have a gender change!!

Reply 4

Lirael Abhorsen

OP

1

well yeah i obviously had a bad experience with my bf who cheated on me but it was always something deeper than that from a young age i wanted to do boys things i was like george from the famous 5 and often refer to myself as colin and think of myself as male, i like to wear male underclothes also. the idea of me being the guy in the r-ship is also more appealing although i am one to experiment so it might just be a cross dressing thing, i'll definitely let it see how it develops over the next few years i don't want to rush into getting an appendage or anything.

Reply 5

SciFi25

1

Lirael Abhorsen

well yeah i obviously had a bad experience with my bf who cheated on me but it was always something deeper than that from a young age i wanted to do boys things i was like george from the famous 5 and often refer to myself as colin and think of myself as male, i like to wear male underclothes also. the idea of me being the guy in the r-ship is also more appealing although i am one to experiment so it might just be a cross dressing thing, i'll definitely let it see how it develops over the next few years i don't want to rush into getting an appendage or anything.

Either way just dont feel that you are the only one with these feelings, you are not. Now I am not a cross dresser but I am Bi and not the socially acceptable way (girls-girl) so I know some of the prejudice you may face. Just don't let it get you down. you deserve to be happy and if this make you happy, then you exercise your right to do it.

Reply 6

mtbab

17

Markus

Transexual pornography may alter your mind? Try it.

coming from someone with experience.

and dont worry about it, your body may just feel like a little change right now its prob a but bored lol.

Reply 7

~Raven~

11

Hi, you sound really confused have a hug :hugs:

Listen, everyone's different but I used to wear boys clothes when I was younger, and I always used to 'play' the boy when we played games and stuff, and I still wear mens clothes some of the time, but I am definately a girl. The question is really not what you like to wear or do or whatever but what you feel you are. If you have a male gender identity I think you would probably be quite a bit more definate about it now... but I'm not entirely sure. All i'm saying with this part is don't worry if you're feeling like you should want to be male and/or gay because you like guys clothes - thats not the case :smile:

.

In terms of your sexuality, as someone has previously said it may be just a reaction to your b/f cheating on you with a guy (did you forgive him for that?!) but it may not. If you want to experiment with girls then do so - but I'd like to point out that I would still consider it cheating regardless of the gender, so the question is really do you mind cheating on your boyfriend? It might just be my view from a bisexual point of view, but... yeah. Ok I'm done, keep me posted :smile:

Reply 8

roff

2

Lirael Abhorsen

i've recently found myself feeling more comfortable in guy clothes and often have tried on my brother's things when he is out, i fantasise about other girls and i'm not sure what to do, i found out my bf was cheating on me with another guy so i'm wondering if it is ok to make a move on a friend of ours - she says she's liked me a long time now even though me and my bf are officially ok again. now do you think its ok to experiment with other girls and my gender indentity without him knowing as i need to find out but i'm afraid what people will think of me as he said the guy came onto him not the other way round. does anyone also know how much gender change operations cost and how i might further investigate this path?

it sounds like both of you are feeling confused.

Reply 9

SilverWings

14

Lirael Abhorsen

i've recently found myself feeling more comfortable in guy clothes and often have tried on my brother's things when he is out, i fantasise about other girls and i'm not sure what to do, i found out my bf was cheating on me with another guy so i'm wondering if it is ok to make a move on a friend of ours - she says she's liked me a long time now even though me and my bf are officially ok again. now do you think its ok to experiment with other girls and my gender indentity without him knowing as i need to find out but i'm afraid what people will think of me as he said the guy came onto him not the other way round. does anyone also know how much gender change operations cost and how i might further investigate this path?

OK, the first thing to think about is your sexuality rather than changing your gender!!

I mean, once you have that sorted, you can THEN think about your gender.

The only clothes I wear are lads clothes... I used to go the whole hog and do the underwear thing as well as a matter of fact...

I get the feeling my mind is predominantly (sp?) male... The way I act/talk/walk/sit/kiss/hug everything... points in the masculine direction.

But I'm female... and I don't think I want to be male...

I went through a stage where I figured I'd be better off male but what you need to do is make sure that you know who you are attracted to first of all... bisexuality can be just a phase or a fantasy, lots of people find that once they actually DO something with a girl, its not all they thought it would be...

Just think about what you're doing/thinking and don't rush any of this...

You are obviously confused, I think you just need to take a step back and look at the whole thing realistically :hugs:

Like SciFi said, come through to the LGBT SOC, the amount of bi girls around is insane, I'm sure they'd be better at helping you than I am...

Reply 10

Lauren Hart

3

Hey, i know how you feel. I quite often used to think i'd really like to be a guy. still do sometimes. Its nothing to particularly worry about, its most probably a subconsious thing. Especially if you have low self confidence or maybe arent the strongest person around if you catch my drift. The guys you see always have loads of confidence and are strong, and it can become very easy to say "if i was a guy that's how i would be" though i may simply be being media minded, lol! (the theory of we see things that we want to be and use the product, the gender in this case, to become that).

As for your sexuality, if you've always had an attraction to both, you probably always will. Its not a problem, and im told women are the better kissers. You get more choice. I really wouldnt advise cheating on your bf, i mean, it would make you as bad as he is really. Dont mean to sound harsh if i do, but you need to remember how crushed it made you feel! By all means, experiment, i advise it whole heartedly. You'll get to know your own feeling so much stronger that way, if its not for you, you'll know it isnt!

I hope this helps. pm me if you want to talk, i often lose track of topics!

confused sexuality wise

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