Turn on thread page Beta
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    Hey peeps, could you please check my cover letter and tell me if I should make any changes and I'm also stuck on what to write at one bit. Thanks :tsr:

    Just to let you know- I'm applying for jobs at Iceland, Tesco, Debenhams and M&S. So I'm using the same cover letter throughout.
    Also - I have worked before at a local grocery store and at Tescos for school work experience.

    Love BlueAngel xxx

    Miss Saba XXXXX
    XXXXXXXX Road
    XXX XXX XXXXX
    XXXXXXXXXXXX
    Tel: XXXXXXXXX
    Mobile: XXXXXXX
    Email: xxxxxxxx

    5 July 2005

    33/37 xxxxxx Street
    xxxxxxxxxxxxx
    Gt. Manchester
    England
    XXX XXXX


    Dear Store Manager,

    Re: Vacancy 4 - Part time General Retail Assistant

    I was thrilled when my friend, xxxxxx xxxxx, told me there was an opening for a general retail assistant at your company. While working towards my bachelor degree, I was employed as a sales assistant with a local grocery store AND…..(help needed here)

    My previous role in (help needed here please) . I was reliable and punctual

    I can offer commitment to delivering a sensational service and have willingness to learn new skills. An ability to work without supervision and within a team situation, and a hard working attitude, proven by references from my previous job. In addition, I believe that my previous experience in retail has prepared me to deal with challenge and pressure.

    I’ve always believed in the quality of your products and have a passion about the brands and services you offer. Please find enclosed my CV in application for the above vacancy.

    I would be happy to attend an interview at any time convenient to you. Contact information is in the letterhead, and the best way to reach me is on my home phone or by email. Thanks for your time and consideration.
    I look forward to hearing from you soon.

    Yours sincerely,

    (Signiture)

    Saba XXXXXXX
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    Note - DO NOT COPY IT AND USE IT AS YOUR OWN - PLAGIRISM!!!!!!!!!
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by BlueAngel)
    Note - DO NOT COPY IT AND USE IT AS YOUR OWN - PLAGIRISM!!!!!!!!!

    lol, like anybody would want to!? OJ it seems quite good, have I got the whole concept of a covering letter wrong? I always try to keep it as mimilistic as possible. For instance shouldn't this part be in your CV?

    My previous role in (help needed here please) . I was reliable and punctual

    I can offer commitment to delivering a sensational service and have willingness to learn new skills. An ability to work without supervision and within a team situation, and a hard working attitude, proven by references from my previous job. In addition, I believe that my previous experience in retail has prepared me to deal with challenge and pressure.

    I’ve always believed in the quality of your products and have a passion about the brands and services you offer. Please find enclosed my CV in application for the above vacancy.
    ?

    When I went for shop work, I did the following as my covering letter....

    DATE
    Dear Sir/Madam, (Name is better, you can find it out fairly easily in most shops)

    I went to your shop today and asked if you had any jobs available, I was told to send you my CV (please find enclosed).
    I am looking for work starting any time from Date , I will be able to work full time between these dates and after I will be able to work weekends and holidays.



    Thank you for your time. I look forward to hearing from you soon.



    Yours faithfully,


    Name

    I'm trying to do a covering letter for a surverying job, atm and a cv, I don't know exactly what to include, it's hard lol.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by lawrence4)
    lol, like anybody would want to!? OJ it seems quite good, have I got the whole concept of a covering letter wrong? I always try to keep it as mimilistic as possible. For instance shouldn't this part be in your CV?


    ?

    When I went for shop work, I did the following as my covering letter....

    DATE
    Dear Sir/Madam, (Name is better, you can find it out fairly easily in most shops)

    I went to your shop today and asked if you had any jobs available, I was told to send you my CV (please find enclosed).
    I am looking for work starting any time from Date , I will be able to work full time between these dates and after I will be able to work weekends and holidays.



    Thank you for your time. I look forward to hearing from you soon.



    Yours faithfully,


    Name

    I'm trying to do a covering letter for a surverying job, atm and a cv, I don't know exactly what to include, it's hard lol.
    Oh right, thanks, so I guess my cover letter should be very little. :tsr: Ok
    Yeah I'llput all that in the Cv. Its just that some websites say you should have 4 paragraphs explaining skills you have and praising the company you apply for.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by BlueAngel)
    Oh right, thanks, so I guess my cover letter should be very little. :tsr: Ok
    Yeah I'llput all that in the Cv. Its just that some websites say you should have 4 paragraphs explaining skills you have and praising the company you apply for.

    Oh ok, best to get another opinion then maybe? I guess it doesn't really matter that much so long as it looks professional.

    I'm having a dilemma about the whole praising the company thing, just don't want my application to sound too falsified.
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    depends on the job, for a grocery store I would jsut tel them why you are applying (more formally than you have) and maybe mildly flatter the company telling them why you you woould value the experience from them
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    The beginning of the letter needs to be more formal. You could write something along the lines of:

    I am interested in applying for the position of General Retail Assistant within your company. During my time at university I was employed as a sales assistant at a local grocery store. This role provided me with experience in the retail sector, as well as sparking my interest in pursuing a career in retail.
    • PS Reviewer
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    PS Reviewer
    (Original post by BlueAngel)
    Dear Store Manager,
    Nope, get their name. It's better if you apply to an actual person, as then they have to answer it rather than passing it along as they can't be bothered.

    (Original post by BlueAngel)
    Re: Vacancy 4 - Part time General Retail Assistant

    I was thrilled when my friend, xxxxxx xxxxx, told me there was an opening for a general retail assistant at your company. While working towards my bachelor degree, I was employed as a sales assistant with a local grocery store AND…..(help needed here)
    Unless your friend actually works there, don't mention them. And even then it does sound a bit like you only want to work there so you can spend all day gossiping. Something like "I saw the advert in the paper/window" would be better.

    (Original post by BlueAngel)
    My previous role in (help needed here please) . I was reliable and punctual
    I'd say "I have previously worked as a sales assistant for X months in XXX. Here, I mainly did cash handling, stock taking, general housekeeping duties" etc.

    (Original post by BlueAngel)
    I can offer
    That sounds a bit like "I will if I want to, but I don't really"

    (Original post by BlueAngel)
    commitment to delivering a sensational service and have willingness to learn new skills. An ability to work without supervision and within a team situation, and a hard working attitude, proven by references from my previous job. In addition, I believe that my previous experience in retail has prepared me to deal with challenge and pressure.
    I'd change that round, and so start with "I believe that my previous experience in retail has prepared me to deal with challenge and pressure." and then go on to say how your references show this.

    (Original post by BlueAngel)
    I’ve always believed in the quality of your products and have a passion about the brands and services you offer. Please find enclosed my CV in application for the above vacancy.
    I don't think that's necessary.

    (Original post by BlueAngel)
    I would be happy to attend an interview at any time convenient to you. Contact information is in the letterhead, and the best way to reach me is on my home phone or by email. Thanks for your time and consideration.
    I look forward to hearing from you soon.
    I'd give them a timescale. Say "within the next month" or whatever. And get rid of the "Contact information is in the letterhead". They're not stupid.

    (Original post by BlueAngel)
    Yours sincerely,
    Should be "yours faithfully" if you haven't got a name. But you will get one, won't you?
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    so many mistakes, lol :rolleyes:
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    Thanks for your help guys. I will be so happy when I get a job and it will be all down to you lot
    • PS Reviewer
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    PS Reviewer
    (Original post by BlueAngel)
    so many mistakes, lol :rolleyes:
    It's not really mistakes, it's just a matter of style!
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Juno)
    It's not really mistakes, it's just a matter of style!
    I thought that too. Thanks for ur help.
 
 
 
Poll
Black Friday: Yay or Nay?
Useful resources

Articles and guides:

Hands typing

Degrees without fees

Discover more about degree-level apprenticeships.

A-Z of careers Advice on choosing a careerCV writing helpCovering letter helpInterview tips

Featured recruiter profiles:

CGI logo

CGI is open for applications

"Offering a range of apprentice and sponsored degree positions."

Deutsche Bank logo

Deutsche Bank is recruiting

"Thrive in an international banking environment"

ICAEW logo

Merck

"Merck is a global leader in specialized pharma & chemicals – join us!"

Army logo

The Army is recruiting now

"With hundreds of roles available, there’s more than one way to be the best."

Bianca Miller, runner-up on The Apprentice

Handle your digital footprint

What would an employer find out about you on Google? Find out how to take control.

Quick links:

Unanswered career sector and employment threads

Groups associated with this forum:

View associated groups

The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

Write a reply...
Reply
Hide
Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.