Do you often notice 'physical flaws' at the start of relationships?

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Riddy
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#1
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#1
When you first have a gf do you notice negatives about them and secretly think 'they are not really that pretty' or when you have sex for the first time think 'her breasts are a bit saggy for my liking' or 'her stomach could be a bit flatter'? Do you get these negative secret thoughts even though you don't show it?

Give examples from previous gf's its probably best to go anon for confidentiality. Or maybe you never see physical 'faults' at the start of a relationship?

Also girls you can answer as well do you secretly think negative stuff about guys?
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The_Musty_Piglet
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#2
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#2
chances are you're no oil paint Wenceslaus
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Malsy
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#3
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lol
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Riddy
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#4
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#4
(Original post by Malsy)
shallow ****
Look you don't know what Ive been through Im far from shallow Id like to have a realistic discussion, you know. In an ideal world looks don't matter and Id be one of the first to say this but im talking about human nature.
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Riddy
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#5
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#5
Just try and answer the question, putting thoughts, emotions and whatever judgements you are making of me aside. If you can't do this don't reply. Simple.
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Malsy
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#6
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#6
(Original post by Riddy)
Look you don't know what Ive been through Im far from shallow Id like to have a realistic discussion, you know. In an ideal world looks don't matter and Id be one of the first to say this but im talking about human nature.

Of course you notice the little flaws but you learn to overlook them, keep them to yourself, and like the person for their good qualities, tbh, etc etc.
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The_Musty_Piglet
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#7
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#7
(Original post by Riddy)
Look you don't know what Ive been through Im far from shallow Id like to have a realistic discussion, you know. In an ideal world looks don't matter and Id be one of the first to say this but im talking about human nature.
you should write a poem
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James'
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#8
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#8
As long as a vagina is present, flaws are ignored.
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Malsy
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#9
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#10
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#10
(Original post by pugnacitas)
wait, let's get this straight... physical beauty actually matters to you? you're in a shallow minority...
I think most people like the look of someone at some point or other in their lives.
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C.C.G
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#11
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#11
(Original post by pugnacitas)
wait, let's get this straight... physical beauty actually matters to you? you're in a shallow minority...
Why is it shallow to have a preference of someones physical appearence, but not for someones personality? You're being equally picky. The only difference is ugly people can change their personality. Is that why ugly people call others shallow? To scare people out of choosing someone physically attractive, and therefore improve their chance of finding a partner?
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Metropolis
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#12
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#12
(Original post by Riddy)
When you first have a gf do you notice negatives about them and secretly think 'they are not really that pretty' or when you have sex for the first time think 'her breasts are a bit saggy for my liking' or 'her stomach could be a bit flatter'? Do you get these negative secret thoughts even though you don't show it?
all the time
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RahRah09
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#13
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#13
Well no one's perfect but if you like someone enough then it doesn't actually matter to you. That's the beauty of being in love.
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*Star*Guitar*
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#14
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#14
(Original post by RahRah09)
Well no one's perfect but if you like someone enough then it doesn't actually matter to you. That's the beauty of being in love.
Exactly. If you're noticing 'flaws' at the start of the relationship then you're obviously not that attracted to the person and should question why you're in the relationship in the first place. Especially if the other person felt more for you than you for them - even if you didn't tell them its not fair when they could be with someone who appreciates them more.
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calamityx
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#15
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#15
(Original post by Riddy)
Look you don't know what Ive been through Im far from shallow Id like to have a realistic discussion, you know. In an ideal world looks don't matter and Id be one of the first to say this but im talking about human nature.

Wow for your sake I hope you are buff and can more than adequately perform to assert something like that.

Another thing, do you watch lots and lots of porn? Maybe your vision of an ideal body's been blurred because of them..porn figures would constitute as "unrealistic". I'm just wondering now what is ideal for you. I can't help but think of what you'll do once you find yourself in a situation where, say you are significantly older and your partner/wife's physique starts to decline somewhat. And wow I find it incredible that you have the energy and focus to do a mental analysis of your gfs body during sex I mean that's just SAD and FCUKED UP. You should've drugged her and examined her parts before.

And FYI girls are really not secretive, we spread unappealing **** about guys around because we like to dissect and laugh about it together. We also warn each other about said traits so others won't have to endure the same piece of sh it we did.


**** interesting what you find when you take the time to dig. Does this ring a bell:

Riddy
Peer Of The TSR Realm
Thread Starter Join Date: Mar 2005
Posts: 1,560

Is it natural to be turned on by even unattractive girls?

Imagine if an unattractive looking girl but with a slim body, lets say small breasts was naked in front of you would you be turned on? Or would she have to have a nice face?
Maybe Im in the minority with my sexual drive ***

It appears that you know more about yourself than you care to let on.
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calamityx
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#16
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#16
(Original post by Hogo)
Is it just me, but whenever someone is trying to get their point across on here, they always mention human nature to back themselves up.

**** the use of those words. Only MJ can use them, and he's not here.

:yep:
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Thrasymachus
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#17
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#17
(Original post by C.C.G)
Why is it shallow to have a preference of someones physical appearence, but not for someones personality? You're being equally picky. The only difference is ugly people can change their personality. Is that why ugly people call others shallow? To scare people out of choosing someone physically attractive, and therefore improve their chance of finding a partner?
It's the philosophy of the weak 'good and bad' turning into 'good and evil' bla bla etc.

(Original post by *Star*Guitar*)
Exactly. If you're noticing 'flaws' at the start of the relationship then you're obviously not that attracted to the person and should question why you're in the relationship in the first place. Especially if the other person felt more for you than you for them - even if you didn't tell them its not fair when they could be with someone who appreciates them more.
The only times i've noticed flaws is at the start of the relationship, I find it difficult to imagine doing so any other time :confused:
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Erradhadh
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#18
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#18
If I was with someone who had flaws, undoubtedly I would notice them. As that's not the case... :love:
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falls_whisper
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#19
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#19
Yes I noticed but that could be due to me not liking him all that much at the beginning. I admit he became better looking in my eyes as the relationship progressed, and then died down again to now, when I find him perfect and attractive to me but yes, I can still see flaws. No one is perfect but I love his flaws just as much as his good parts :P

None of the flaws have really bother me (certainly less and less as time went on), if it bothers you then clearly something is wrong...

Edit: Thought I might add that I have been besotted with another guy before, and yes I saw him as pretty much 99% perfect (which I'm sure he never was). We never went out, but hey that's infatuation for you :o:
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Deamo
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#20
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#20
Humanity is full of flaws- that's the beauty of being human.

Think of it my way; everyone's the perfect them. ^__^ [aka, there's no one who could be a more perfect you, than yourself].
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