The Student Room Group

What Would You Do If You Were Pregnant?

Just wondering what people here [men can have their say too] would do if they [or their gf] had a slip up in the near future (so I'm assuming a time that isn't ideal and not planned). Putting aside emergency contraception, what would you do if you found out you were pregnant? At what age would you ideally like to have children and what would you do if those plans changed? Would your decision be influenced by who the father of the baby is etc etc?

I don't want this to turn into an abortion debate particularly, although I expect some of that will come into it.

I know a good number of girls who I went to school with who now either have babies or are heavily pregnant and it made me wonder about the topic.

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personally i don't think i'd have a child if i was in that scenario, as i wouldn't feel able to take the responsibility plus my dad would probably throw me out as i would be a stain on the family record.. my grandma even once said "if any of my grandchildren get pregnant unmarried i wouldn't allow them to visit me anymore." my dads the sort of guy who talks about fornication as a sin though so you get the picture...
Reply 2
blissy
Just wondering what people here [men can have their say too] would do if they [or their gf] had a slip up in the near future (so I'm assuming a time that isn't ideal and not planned). Putting aside emergency contraception, what would you do if you found out you were pregnant? At what age would you ideally like to have children and what would you do if those plans changed? Would your decision be influenced by who the father of the baby is etc etc?

I don't want this to turn into an abortion debate particularly, although I expect some of that will come into it.

I know a good number of girls who I went to school with who now either have babies or are heavily pregnant and it made me wonder about the topic.

Could you have asked a tougher question!! Lol! TBH i dont think it would be to keep it...probz more likely put it up for adoption.
Reply 3
where is the swear alot and cry option?
Reply 4
Be very worried since im a guy?

but seriously i would stick by my gf and support her in what ever she decides

Oh and i would be really scared of getting killed by her and my parents
Reply 5
BhArJ
Be very worried since im a guy?

but seriously i would stick by my gf and support her to what ever she decides

What an upstanding gentleman :smile:
Reply 6
blissy
what would you do if you found out you were pregnant? At what age would you ideally like to have children and what would you do if those plans changed? Would your decision be influenced by who the father of the baby is etc etc?
I'd be secretely pleased, but terrified of what my parents would think of me. Ideally I'd want kids while I'm in a stable relationship, preferably married with a good job (after uni) and decent house, probably aged 26+.

Unless the pregnancy was due to a one-night stand/rape/ someone with appalling genes/ who I hated, then I'd keep huim/her I think. Having said that, you don't know until it happens to you- I could just freak out and get an abortion.

All my school-mates would have an abortion straight away, but they've said they're not from such well-off familes, so financially couldn't cope.
Reply 7
I don't know. It would depend how quickly I found out - if it was early stages I could probably cope with having an abortion, but I'm not sure I could hack a surgical one. In that case, I'd probably keep it and get on as best I can with my studies, and then either give it up for adoption or possibly my parents would take it (but unlikely.)

I suspect in terms of maturity and intelligence I could handle a baby, looking after it and raising it etc, but it would ruin all my future plans and make life 1000000 times more difficult.
Reply 8
i got a girl pregnant once, but tbh i dont see that it is my problem. Besides, i dont even know her anymore.
Reply 9
I would have to have the baby and keep it. If I aborted it, the guilt would stay with me for the rest of my life and I'd always have the 'ghost' of that child hanging over me. Its not even a moral thing, if I could abort it in good conscience, I would, but I couldn't.

And after carrying it and having it, I couldn't give my baby away to someone else, knowing that it would be out there, and would eventually know that I hadn't wanted it. I'm basically a softie, and believe very much that blood and family are important.
Reply 10
Dwight66
i got a girl pregnant once, but tbh i dont see that it is my problem. Besides, i dont even know her anymore.


It's not your problem you're pig-headed enough not to use a condom?
Reply 11
I'd have an abortion unless I was so far gone that it'd require surgical methods, then it really would feel like killing my baby.
Reply 12
Helenia
It's not your problem you're pig-headed enough not to use a condom?


why should i waste my money with a girl i never intend to see again?
Reply 13
Helenia
I don't know. It would depend how quickly I found out - if it was early stages I could probably cope with having an abortion, but I'm not sure I could hack a surgical one. In that case, I'd probably keep it and get on as best I can with my studies, and then either give it up for adoption or possibly my parents would take it (but unlikely.)

I suspect in terms of maturity and intelligence I could handle a baby, looking after it and raising it etc, but it would ruin all my future plans and make life 1000000 times more difficult.

Don't uni's have creche's and child-care arrangements though?

Similarly I'd get my parents to look after him/her at least until I'd finished 6th form, and my mum's giving up work when I finish anyway sooo.. :rolleyes:
Reply 14
Dwight66
why should i waste my money with a girl i never intend to see again?


I hope this guys joking :rolleyes:

If not, its the reason there are so many lesbians around
Reply 15
Dwight66
why should i waste my money with a girl i never intend to see again?

omg, what if the guy im seeing is actually like this.....

i might actually be pregnant. i know i should have gotten the morning after pill, But i couldnt get out in time to get the morning after pill......argh.... ok, whats the probability that a 16 yr old girl is pregnant from having unprotected sex but having it withdrawn before orgasm???(i know its a useless method)

and whens a girl likely to become more easily pregnant?? like straight after periods???

Please dont lecture me (well you can but its not gonna make a difference). i know i should have made him use a condom etc etc etc.

ive always said that id have an abortion, but if and when it comes to the crunch, i dont think i could do it.
Reply 16
Dwight66
why should i waste my money with a girl i never intend to see again?

Seeing as you appear so selfish, I'm surprised you wouldn't want to use condoms to protect yourself against STIs.
Reply 17
I'd get really pissed off at myself for messing up both the pill and a condom. Then I'd be right down the clinic. The only person I could get pregnant off is my boyfriend, and we've talked about what we would do already, and he said that he wouldn't ditch me, and he'd be there and help me through the abortion. He said he'd be pissed off that he hadn't used protection correctly and angry with himself for getting us into that situation.
Reply 18
look, i be coming across in a negative light here and seem uncaring. I bought her LOTS of drinks, so she should have paid for some sort of protection. I dont see what the problem is.
Reply 19
Dwight66
why should i waste my money with a girl i never intend to see again?


because if you are shagging randoms you might catch something for a start. Secondly child support is pretty expensive you know.