Not speaking to parents

well, i feel for you first of all for all the pain you have gone thru. but i think you have to learn how to forgive which im sure you do. just forgive your dad. maybe call him one day and you know how girls do it be very emotional and say to tell him how you felt when you guys were in an argument. tell him also that you dont think its right because you are my dad and i want you to be part of my life and want us to be a loving and caring family. tell him that you forgive him for everthing he has done to you. im sure after that he will say the same perhaps even break down too into tears.

i think your aunt is right 100%, because if suddenly your dad died(i dont pray for this and im sure no one will cos i dont) you will feel guilty for the rest of your life and will feel very bad and miserable for the rest of your life.

hope it helps :smile:

Reply 3

IZZY!

15

obviously you need to talk to him.or u can make him drink vodka and then he ll become kind and will confess to u

Reply 4

OP

Lollirot

Just my view but he shouldn't have hit you so hard as to have given you a black eye and cuts. That's abuse. It must be a werid situation, but I don't think you're weird.

I only got the cuts from hitting my eye on the toilet seat he pushed me and I slipped. No idea how the fight ended up in the bathroom lol

r u a boy or a girl?

Do you know whether your dad has any remorse or regret for what he's done? Any compassion for you afterwards?

Reply 7

IZZY!

obviously you need to talk to him.or u can make him drink vodka and then he ll become kind and will confess to u

lol, maybe he will become even more violent. :eek:

Reply 8

x-Jo-x

Do you know whether your dad has any remorse or regret for what he's done? Any compassion for you afterwards?

Reply 9

IZZY!

15

andyj72

lol, maybe he will become even more violent. :eek:

it depends rly. peaceful and kind ppl become more kind. violent ppl become more violent.lol

Reply 10

OP

andyj72

well, i feel for you first of all for all the pain you have gone thru. but i think you have to learn how to forgive which im sure you do. just forgive your dad. maybe call him one day and you know how girls do it be very emotional and say to tell him how you felt when you guys were in an argument. tell him also that you dont think its right because you are my dad and i want you to be part of my life and want us to be a loving and caring family. tell him that you forgive him for everthing he has done to you. im sure after that he will say the same perhaps even break down too into tears.

i think your aunt is right 100%, because if suddenly your dad died(i dont pray for this and im sure no one will cos i dont) you will feel guilty for the rest of your life and will feel very bad and miserable for the rest of your life.

hope it helps :smile:

Its not really the forgiving thats the problem its gonna be hard to bring myself to actually speak after so long :confused:

Hes not taking any of it serious he just laughs and still calls me b***h etc even though ive not said a word lol so theres a lot less arguments this way.

Reply 11

jamlan

12

alio~

Its not really the forgiving thats the problem its gonna be hard to bring myself to actually speak after so long :confused:

Hes not taking any of it serious he just laughs and still calls me b***h etc even though ive not said a word lol so theres a lot less arguments this way.

Is all this out of character for him? Did he always call you names and swear? Has he hit you before?

Reply 12

IZZY!

it depends rly. peaceful and kind ppl become more kind. violent ppl become more violent.lol

yea after beating her up like that, i'll imagine he will become more violent. i dont think any father should do treat their daughter like that. to come to think of it most dad's try to be nice, caring and loving to their daughters. they try and treat them like how they will treat their wife. i guess :rolleyes:

Reply 13

Possession

1

alio~ what do you think?

Do you actually want to speak to your father, especially after what he's done?

Reply 14

Font

alio~

It sounds a long time but time flies, but i had an argument with my dad years ago he swore at me so I swore back and he hit me really hard on the head and kept hitting me saying 'stop calling me etc' anyway I ended up with a black eye lol and few cuts. From that night I promised myself Id never speak to him and ive not done even though wev'e lived in the same house my mums had enough since shes always the one in the middle so if my dads making tea he'l ask her what I want then she'l ask me etc sounds pathetic but it'd be really hard to give in and start speaking. Plus he still calls me for no reason so its likely it'd only result in arguments.
My aunty came round the other night and had a right go at me saying im weird and I'l feel real guilty when hes dead etc.
I just wondered what are your views on this? since i can see both sides of it.

im sort of in a tricky family situation too...not talked to my sister for a year...tried to make up...she stopeped taling to me over a pathetic arguemtn and its been two years now...as for my grandad...had problems with him; i didn't talke to him in his last few years before he died and i didn't regret one it not talking to him - he treated me like i was his plaything...can use me when he wants and shout at me and get me into trouble when he felt like it...and it hated me for being atheist. I'm not getting along with my dad either - i think he is using me for his own gain...he sees me as some sort of investment and believes that i owe my life to him and have to give everything i earn to him just because if it wern't for him "you wouldn't be alive" attitude :mad:

- i've been there and done that. I say live a life of coexistent until you start uni, and move out...that is what i'm intent on doing...and gradually become more independent, and leave permanently :smile:

The future can only get better,

PK

Reply 15

Font

x-Jo-x

alio~ what do you think?

Do you actually want to speak to your father, especially after what he's done?

i wouldn't....even though i know its stupid...people like his father are mental - they have no feelings for anyone other than themselves!

Reply 16

OP

x-Jo-x

Do you know whether your dad has any remorse or regret for what he's done? Any compassion for you afterwards?

Well he threatens to 'knock my block off' every now and again lol if my mum starts yelling at me. Its strange cause he always does as she says and has never hit her etc shes like the boss and in general hes nice to everyone I think he just lacks someone to have control over and it happens to be me

Reply 17

alio~

Its not really the forgiving thats the problem its gonna be hard to bring myself to actually speak after so long :confused:

Hes not taking any of it serious he just laughs and still calls me b***h etc even though ive not said a word lol so theres a lot less arguments this way.

looks like your dad thinks its all a big joke. how about you write it down on a piece of paper and give it to him.

or say something like "look dad, i think its time we reconcile :confused:

. all this crap thats going on shouldnt be going on. i do not appreciate you calling me a b***h also and ....."

Reply 18

OP

x-Jo-x

alio~ what do you think?

Do you actually want to speak to your father, especially after what he's done?

Im not too bothered im fine with the way things are and so is he its just it looks so pathetic and immature to other people

btw to those who dont know im female :biggrin:

Reply 19