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Clubs. Dancing. And my stupid morals. watch

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    My head's feeling a little messed up, because I can't decide what I actually want. I know most of you will think I'm wayyy over analysing this, which I know I am.

    I made a somewhat similar thread some time ago, but it's a little different this time. When I dance with guys in clubs that I don't know, I feel really bad about it the morning after once I'm sober, kind of dirty and disgusted with myself and all that. But the thing is, I want to be dancing with guys - but dancing with randomers makes me feel used and kinda crap, but dancing with mates is just, you know, you can't go past a certain line, or things get awkward. But I do actually want to be dancing with guys - I just can't figure out what to do to stop feeling, I don't know, so bizarrely, stupidly moral. Any advice, if anyone actually read this insanely stupid post?? :rolleyes:
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    Just gotta figure out where you think the line is for you and then keep to it. There's not much else you can do, really... Some people just don't like the club atmosphere.
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    (Original post by facetious)
    My head's feeling a little messed up, because I can't decide what I actually want. I know most of you will think I'm wayyy over analysing this, which I know I am.

    I made a somewhat similar thread some time ago, but it's a little different this time. When I dance with guys in clubs that I don't know, I feel really bad about it the morning after once I'm sober, kind of dirty and disgusted with myself and all that. But the thing is, I want to be dancing with guys - but dancing with randomers makes me feel used and kinda crap, but dancing with mates is just, you know, you can't go past a certain line, or things get awkward. But I do actually want to be dancing with guys - I just can't figure out what to do to stop feeling, I don't know, so bizarrely, stupidly moral. Any advice, if anyone actually read this insanely stupid post?? :rolleyes:
    Hmm, ok I'm dancing with you , you've just met me and you like me. What do you want?
    Just to dance?
    Maybe a fun kiss?
    Or possibly more?
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    (Original post by facetious)
    My head's feeling a little messed up, because I can't decide what I actually want. I know most of you will think I'm wayyy over analysing this, which I know I am.

    I made a somewhat similar thread some time ago, but it's a little different this time. When I dance with guys in clubs that I don't know, I feel really bad about it the morning after once I'm sober, kind of dirty and disgusted with myself and all that. But the thing is, I want to be dancing with guys - but dancing with randomers makes me feel used and kinda crap, but dancing with mates is just, you know, you can't go past a certain line, or things get awkward. But I do actually want to be dancing with guys - I just can't figure out what to do to stop feeling, I don't know, so bizarrely, stupidly moral. Any advice, if anyone actually read this insanely stupid post?? :rolleyes:
    Unless you're blowing them in the toilets, i can't see your point.
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    (Original post by Chiko 1001)
    Just gotta figure out where you think the line is for you and then keep to it. There's not much else you can do, really... Some people just don't like the club atmosphere.
    I like the club atmosphere though.. it's one of my favourite ways to de-stress! But this whole thing is annoying me because I can't figure it out, ugh.
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    (Original post by Sam656)
    Unless you're blowing them in the toilets, i can't see your point.
    Hence 'bizarrely, stupid morals'.
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    (Original post by Philosoraptor)
    Hmm, ok I'm dancing with you , you've just met me and you like me. What do you want?
    Just to dance?
    Maybe a fun kiss?
    Or possibly more?
    I guess.. if you're a nice, non sleazy kind of guy, just to dance really. Suggestive dancing if I really like you. But nothing more than that. Hmm.. but then I think I'd still feel crap the next day. Unless we kept in touch, like met up and stuff. But I'm definitely not looking for a relationship.. so what does that mean now?? More confusion..
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    (Original post by facetious)
    I guess.. if you're a nice, non sleazy kind of guy, just to dance really. Suggestive dancing if I really like you. But nothing more than that. Hmm.. but then I think I'd still feel crap the next day. Unless we kept in touch, like met up and stuff. But I'm definitely not looking for a relationship.. so what does that mean now?? More confusion..
    Sugestive dancing would piss me of.
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    (Original post by facetious)
    I guess.. if you're a nice, non sleazy kind of guy, just to dance really. Suggestive dancing if I really like you. But nothing more than that. Hmm.. but then I think I'd still feel crap the next day. Unless we kept in touch, like met up and stuff. But I'm definitely not looking for a relationship.. so what does that mean now?? More confusion..
    It means you're over thinking it all ... There's absolutely nothing wrong (morally or whatever) with dancing with strangers in clubs. You're not kissing them or anything... do you think ballroom dancing or shows like Strictly Come Dancing are 'morally wrong'? Just because it's not a place of organised dance, why is dancing so morally wrong?

    Try not to stress. You're hurting no one, just having fun.
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    Dancing isn't for you.
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    You silly sausage.
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    (Original post by facetious)
    I guess.. if you're a nice, non sleazy kind of guy, just to dance really. Suggestive dancing if I really like you. But nothing more than that. Hmm.. but then I think I'd still feel crap the next day. Unless we kept in touch, like met up and stuff. But I'm definitely not looking for a relationship.. so what does that mean now?? More confusion..
    Hmm I think you have some problems that females sometimes have - usually where they've been brought up in a restrictive culture where sex is wrong etc, but then end up fighting themselves because they do want to be out there having fun with guys.


    Haha yes I am definitely not sleazy lol. Ok fun dancing it is - do that then! If you find it fun.


    Not everyone's a jackass, this is actually how I met my last gf, we danced loads that night, kissed and eventually started going out... Neither of us felt 'dirty'...
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    (Original post by facetious)
    My head's feeling a little messed up, because I can't decide what I actually want. I know most of you will think I'm wayyy over analysing this, which I know I am.

    I made a somewhat similar thread some time ago, but it's a little different this time. When I dance with guys in clubs that I don't know, I feel really bad about it the morning after once I'm sober, kind of dirty and disgusted with myself and all that. But the thing is, I want to be dancing with guys - but dancing with randomers makes me feel used and kinda crap, but dancing with mates is just, you know, you can't go past a certain line, or things get awkward. But I do actually want to be dancing with guys - I just can't figure out what to do to stop feeling, I don't know, so bizarrely, stupidly moral. Any advice, if anyone actually read this insanely stupid post?? :rolleyes:
    I feel exactly the same.. I'm just not 'comfortable' with it and I have no idea why! Most of my mates don't really think twice about it but, like you, I feel a bit weird about it the next day
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    (Original post by Asha1991)
    I feel exactly the same.. I'm just not 'comfortable' with it and I have no idea why! Most of my mates don't really think twice about it but, like you, I feel a bit weird about it the next day
    Do you? I.e. you want to do it but just feel bad later?
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    (Original post by Philosoraptor)
    Hmm I think you have some problems that females sometimes have - usually where they've been brought up in a restrictive culture where sex is wrong etc, but then end up fighting themselves because they do want to be out there having fun with guys.


    Haha yes I am definitely not sleazy lol. Ok fun dancing it is - do that then! If you find it fun.


    Not everyone's a jackass, this is actually how I met my last gf, we danced loads that night, kissed and eventually started going out... Neither of us felt 'dirty'...
    This is true, I'm actually Indian, so my parents would look down on this kind of stuff quite a lot. So I suppose it is the British in me conflicting with the Indian in me :rolleyes:
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    (Original post by facetious)
    This is true, I'm actually Indian, so my parents would look down on this kind of stuff quite a lot. So I suppose it is the British in me conflicting with the Indian in me :rolleyes:
    Well everyone hides stuff from their parents lol... do you think I mention my every activity.

    Hmm, seriously hun, if you like doing it just do it. If you only want to dance, then dance if they try anything more just move away.
    If you only want to kiss and nothing else - do that - I know plenty of girls who do that but don't want to take the guy home.

    If you want to kiss but are interested in meeting up with them another time afterwards soberly, then do that.

    Enjoy! C'mon when you're older you'll regret not having fun.
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    Clubs and morals don't go together.

    Tbh, you can dance like a looney toon and get away with it in a club.

    Do that infront of the Queen and never mind Andrew, Bin Laden would probably shoot you.

    :shoot:
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    (Original post by Philosoraptor)
    Well everyone hides stuff from their parents lol... do you think I mention my every activity.

    Hmm, seriously hun, if you like doing it just do it. If you only want to dance, then dance if they try anything more just move away.
    If you only want to kiss and nothing else - do that - I know plenty of girls who do that but don't want to take the guy home.

    If you want to kiss but are interested in meeting up with them another time afterwards soberly, then do that.

    Enjoy! C'mon when you're older you'll regret not having fun.
    Yeah, dont want to leave room for regrets later on. Thanks for all the advice!
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    You should have realised by now that you're really a **** inside but it takes a few drinks and a vulgar atmosphere to bring it out. Then in the morning you go back to your make-believe good girl routine and think it's immoral. Save the act, just do what you want...if you do stuff like this it means it's in you to do it.

    You're afraid of feeling 'used and kind of crap' you say...and what is it that you're expecting when you go to a club surrounded with drunk class-class douchebags who are looking to stick their dingalings in a cave? to be treated like some regal princess?

    Just do what you want!
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    (Original post by facetious)
    Yeah, dont want to leave room for regrets later on. Thanks for all the advice!
    Np, enjoy but no regrets ok?

    If you really will hate yourself for something - don't do it in the first place.
    Forget your parents, do or do not depending on how YOU feel...
 
 
 
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