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Girls: If you know a guy likes you but is ridiculously shy, would it put you off? Watch

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    Btw, I'm not asking whether you like shy guys or not.

    You have a feeling a guy likes you, but he is soooo shy, such that he finds it really difficult to speak to you, how would you respond? Would you just give up on him?
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    #1

    Being a very shy guy who finds it hard to approach girls myself, I too would like to know the answer to this.
    Lets say that the shy guy will probably never approach you but once first contact is made, he is actually able to speak to you- would his lack of initiation (including being afraid to initiate thigns like asking you out, holding hands, first kiss, etc) put you off if that was the only thing wrong with him and all else is up to par?
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    Just going to throw this wild answer out there... so wild.

    But, could it possibly depend on the girl?

    Strange thing - not every girl likes what another likes. Crazy right? Who'd have thought it.
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    #2

    Being a ridiculously shy girl, no, I would not give up on him at all. I'd just want him to try his best to be open and honest with me, and I wouldn't mind if he wasn't perfectly coherent etc. in doing that. If he made the effort, that would mean a lot to me, and I'd have a lot of respect for him for it.
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    I don't like girls who automatically assume that since you can actually sit in company of three or four people without talking nonsensical *****, that you're 'shy'. I'm quiet darling, not shy.
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    I know it's very hypocritical of me, but I'm quite shy and would not like to be the loud one of the relationship, so yes, I'd probably give up on him. :o:
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    I have a thing for shy guys.. I think its sweet.
    I'm quite talkative and confident, I've always tended to be the loud one in relationships.
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    I wouldn't really be on it, it would annoy me if I had to make all the moves.
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    Abit of shyness is aryt but Ridiculously shy is verry off-putting.
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    If he can't hold a conversation, voice opinions, be assertive or have fun with me, what makes him reckon he has a chance of being my bf tbh.

    I know someone who is frightfully shy and who I once had a soft spot for. But I've grown up and he is still exactly the same. He won't order food in a restaurant until I order first (and then he orders the same)/he wont suggest we do anything, it has to be my choice/he wont choose a dvd or a film to see at the cinema. I think its because he is shy and scared of what I'll think of his opinions, so he refuses to give them no matter how hard I try to relax him and get him to come out of his shell. I just know that if I were with him I'd have to make all the moves, in the bedroom he'd be a lay back and let you do it all sort of guy. So when he tells me he likes me its like no, come back when you have a personality.
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    It wouldn't put me off; but if I had to initiate EVERYTHING
    it would get a bit tiresome.
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    (Original post by Valjean)
    If he can't hold a conversation, voice opinions, be assertive or have fun with me, what makes him reckon he has a chance of being my bf tbh.

    I know someone who is frightfully shy and who I once had a soft spot for. But I've grown up and he is still exactly the same. He won't order food in a restaurant until I order first (and then he orders the same)/he wont suggest we do anything, it has to be my choice/he wont choose a dvd or a film to see at the cinema. I think its because he is shy and scared of what I'll think of his opinions, so he refuses to give them no matter how hard I try to relax him and get him to come out of his shell. I just know that if I were with him I'd have to make all the moves, in the bedroom he'd be a lay back and let you do it all sort of guy. So when he tells me he likes me its like no, come back when you have a personality.
    *shudders* This is what I fear.
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    I know a guy like that but it hasn't put me off. My sisters and friends tell me to not bother because I make all the moves but somtimes you need to give people time to come out of their shells.
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    (Original post by James')
    Just going to throw this wild answer out there... so wild.

    But, could it possibly depend on the girl?

    Strange thing - not every girl likes what another likes. Crazy right? Who'd have thought it.
    Can I just say.
    Your sig is revolting :p:
    • #1
    #1

    (Original post by Valjean)
    I just know that if I were with him I'd have to make all the moves, in the bedroom he'd be a lay back and let you do it all sort of guy.
    Speaking on behalf of the shy guys, the reason why we are reluctant to initiate things is often because we don't want to put the girl off by seeming pervy and making her think "he just wants one thing". As much as we'd like to swoop girls off their feet, kiss them and initiate other such things, we're just afraid to.
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    Nope it makes me want him more

    would definitely crack a joke or something to get him to open up or talk about something he likes
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Speaking on behalf of the shy guys, the reason why we are reluctant to initiate things is often because we don't want to put the girl off by seeming pervy and making her think "he just wants one thing". As much as we'd like to swoop girls off their feet, kiss them and initiate other such things, we're just afraid to.
    Well, I am sick of having to guess what guys want. I've encountered this on both ends of the spectrum and both are just as frustrating. I don't want a renovation project, I want a guy who needs little work. Mainly one who is at least equal to me in emotional development.

    Confidence is sexy. Indifference and having to do everything myself if I want something isn't. There is shy in a cute way, which is lovely, and then shy in a way that it inhibits the time we spend together being fun at all. :sad:
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Speaking on behalf of the shy guys, the reason why we are reluctant to initiate things is often because we don't want to put the girl off by seeming pervy and making her think "he just wants one thing". As much as we'd like to swoop girls off their feet, kiss them and initiate other such things, we're just afraid to.
    Right, and this seems like a good principle but it's wrong, wrong, wrong!

    Although you've probably gotten the impression by what's been said above, this more formal explanation may make more sense:

    "It's not because women like jerks. Women prefer polite over rude, and attentive over distracted. The problem is the way nice guys present these positive characteristics. In order to appear friendly and romantic, these 'nice guys' think they have to turn off their sexuality. They hide their desires in order not to offend, presenting an androgynous, asexual persona. The first impression they give is one of emasculation, weakness, and lack of desire. At best, they confuse the woman as to whether they even find her attractive. That's what jerks offer women that nice guys don't: they're not afraid to be sexual.
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nice_guy

    I suggest you seriously learn from this, otherwise many wasted years lie ahead.
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    I like quiet guys not shy. I wouldn't go up to someone and start a conversation because I would think they want to be left alone. If they made eye contact and smiled I would smile back and hopefully initiate conversation.
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    no it wouldnt

    (Original post by James')
    Just going to throw this wild answer out there... so wild.

    But, could it possibly depend on the girl?

    Strange thing - not every girl likes what another likes. Crazy right? Who'd have thought it.

    that must be one of the most disgusting sigs ever
 
 
 
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