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    Anon or delete please because I think he may use this.

    My ex boyfriend and I broke up nearly 3 years ago. During this time we have been on and off and neither of us have been out with anyone else.
    Recently he has been talking about getting back into a relationship (which would hopefully last a long time). I love him but I don't trust him as much as I used to.

    I was wondering if any of you have any experience in a relationship with not as much trust as there could be, but a lot of love, and did it work or not?

    Thanks in advance!
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    I guess it depends on why you don't trust him and if you can overcome those problems.
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    one of the key thing about a relationship is to trust your gf/bf, if there is no trust between you and him then the relationship won't last as much longer than it should.
    why can't you trust him?
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    Yeah, me and my ex did the on/off 3years thing. When we tried to get back together "properly" it just ended up being exactly the same as before, with exactly the same problems. Eventually you just have to accept that you're not supposed to be together, I think.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    My ex boyfriend and I broke up nearly 3 years ago. During this time we have been on and off... I love him but I don't trust him as much as I used to.

    ...a relationship with not as much trust as there could be, but a lot of love, and did it work or not?
    Hey!

    I've never been in this situation but I recall some advice my Nana once gave me, "He's an ex for a reason!". You obviously broke up with this guy for a reason you felt necessary and important enough to leave him for. If you wanted to be with him, surely throughout this "on/off" period he or you would have suggested a long-term relationship? However, you could argue that you have been on a 'break' and have now realised you want to be together... ?

    My only issue here would be the trust aspect. I can't imagine being with my boyfriend and not trusting him. In my opinion, trust and love go hand in hand and without one the other will simply cause the relationship to be full of doubts and insecurities. You need to figure out why you don't trust him and if you can overcome this. Talk to him and find out what he wants. Maybe think about starting afresh? Go on dates, get to know each other again and work out if he really is the one you want to be with. If you turn him down, do some soul-searching and he's still waiting when you're finished, then he clearly really wants you. If you tell him your doubts and he runs a mile, beware of his intentions and consider if he's worth it.

    I just wonder why, after 3 years, you are considering getting back together with him now. Are you lonely or scared or just want to be with him because he's familiar? If neither of you have seen anyone else in this time, how do you know there's not someone better out there for you?

    Think about:
    a) Why you broke up
    b) Why it's taken 3 years to consider getting back together
    c) Why you don't trust him and if you can resolve these trust issues
    d) If you really, truly love him or if you merely think you do
    e) His and your own intentions, what do you want out of a relationship
    f) If you want to 'play the field', as it were, I don't mean sleeping around but perhaps date other people before you launch back into anything with him
    g) If he really is the one for you, can you talk to him about how you feel?

    Once you've thought all those things through, then decided if you want to be with him or not!

    Hope this helps!! :yes:
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    Thanks guys! Lots of stuff for me to think about!

    In reply to Miss Attitude, the reason I don't trust him so much is because he has let me down a lot over the years, and also for a while when I was trying to get over him we slept together and then I wouldn't hear from him in ages which really effected me - partly my fault I admit for being so naive.
    He seems to have really changed over the past 6 months which makes me think we should give it another go. I think if I do go for this option I will take Girl♥RadioHeart's advice and go on dates etc before rushing into things.
    Thank you guys! I really appreciate all your advice. So much to think about.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Thanks guys! Lots of stuff for me to think about!

    In reply to Miss Attitude, the reason I don't trust him so much is because he has let me down a lot over the years, and also for a while when I was trying to get over him we slept together and then I wouldn't hear from him in ages which really effected me - partly my fault I admit for being so naive.
    He seems to have really changed over the past 6 months which makes me think we should give it another go. I think if I do go for this option I will take Girl♥RadioHeart's advice and go on dates etc before rushing into things.
    Thank you guys! I really appreciate all your advice. So much to think about.
    I know where you're coming from. I am currently sleeping with an ex that I broke up with 8 months ago after a year and a half.

    I love him so much but he is really indifferent towards me. When we were together and one of the main reasons we broke up; he said he didn't love me because he didn't believe in love
 
 
 
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