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    Hi, 18y.o. virgin here. Met my bf (not a virgin) two months ago. He's a really great guy, and I am becoming emotionally attached to him. We've fooled around a couple of times (but haven't gone all the way yet), and I find that I can't give him a good bj. Just the other day, I tried to satisfy him, but I couldn't, and now I feel depressed. I've only given two bjs (both for him) in my life, and I feel stupid because I really don't know what the hell I'm doing.

    We're currently waiting for the bc (I've scheduled a dr.'s appointment in Feb), and I'm hoping he'll do what he says and get tested. But now I'm wondering, so I even bother having a sex life? I'll be terrible in bed, I don't know what I'm doing in terms of giving blow jobs. I really like him, and I want to go there, but I'm afraid that he'll think I'm terrible and leave me. But I've also contemplated allowing him having girls on the side to meet his needs because I feel like I'll never meet his.

    What should I do?
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    You weren't good at something the first one or two times so just give up.

    Now we've seen how silly that sounds, ask him how to do it, the problem will soon go away..
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    Ron Mael wrote it and and Russell Mael sang it best over thirty years ago:

    "It's a lot like playing the violin
    You cannot start off to be Yehudi Menuhin"

    Why on earth should you know? The next time, treat it as exploring, and ask him to give lots of feedback.

    Oh, don't expect him to come as a result. He might, or he might not and not doing so isn't a judgement on your learning. If he makes it so, it's not a good sign.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Hi, 18y.o. virgin here. Met my bf (not a virgin) two months ago. He's a really great guy, and I am becoming emotionally attached to him. We've fooled around a couple of times (but haven't gone all the way yet), and I find that I can't give him a good bj. Just the other day, I tried to satisfy him, but I couldn't, and now I feel depressed. I've only given two bjs (both for him) in my life, and I feel stupid because I really don't know what the hell I'm doing.

    We're currently waiting for the bc (I've scheduled a dr.'s appointment in Feb), and I'm hoping he'll do what he says and get tested. But now I'm wondering, so I even bother having a sex life? I'll be terrible in bed, I don't know what I'm doing in terms of giving blow jobs. I really like him, and I want to go there, but I'm afraid that he'll think I'm terrible and leave me. But I've also contemplated allowing him having girls on the side to meet his needs because I feel like I'll never meet his.

    What should I do?
    Behave, you've only done it twice - you're not automatically going to become super awesome overnight, and everyone's gotta start somewhere so stop feeling so stupid/down about yourself You just need to take your time and learn where/how to push his buttons. I learnt from partly doing research on the net, partly from spending a hell of alot of time exploring him myself. Communication is key!

    Oh, and don't forget to have fun!!
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    Practice makes perfect!

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    I felt the same after the couple of times I gave a blowjob, so I googled it, read up on some techniques, and if nothing else it makes you feel more confident. Ask him what he likes, it's part of a relationship learning what the other person like and dislikes.
    It can be pretty scary, but he'll appreciate that you're trying.

    Don't start worrying what you'll be like at sex, cross that bridge when you come to it.
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    You could level with him, tell him you're not that confident, ask him what he likes/what he'd like you to do?

    Unless you've got a mouth the size of a jellybean, you'll be fine..
    • #2
    #2

    Also, you're worried about him leaving you because you're bad in bed (although you've never tried) despite the fact that he's also a fumbling virgin and will have no idea what to expect either.

    Treat it as exploration, and go for it, see what you both enjoy
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    Practise! things will improve
    • #3
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    http://www.howtogivehead.biz/

    but practise
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    No one is going to be fantastic at anything after 2 times! All you need to do is practise. He knows (I assume) you are a virgin, so he will know you haven't done anything like this before. He will understand - I'm sure he felt the same as you at the beginning. I agree with previous posts, ask him what he likes. It's better doing this (no matter how embarrassing it may be) than being totally clueless, and feeling depressed.

    About being rubbish in bed, don't worry about it! He will know it's you're first time, so he will know what to expect. You will improve over time!
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    Just practice at it and youll be fine, plus alot of guys cant come from a BJ alone it takes a little bit more.

    My ex was amazing at doing it and would do it for me all the time but i think i only came from it maybe once or twice with just her doing it herself and thats a result of hundreds of attempts.

    Its not as easy as it would seem so just keep trying id say, and he definately wont complain
 
 
 
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