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    I do. Luckily I'm a girl and so can't really be considered stalker-ish but often I admire guys from afar and obsess over them for ages and imagine what its like being with them etc when we have barely even spoken to each other. I think its creepy and if anyone else did this with me then I'd have to file a restraining order so I don't wanna do it to anyone else. Also sometimes I'll obsess over Guy A and the very next day want Guy B-so this obsessing will never get me anywhere with guys since I obsess about quite a few and none are as good as the next guy I might fancy.

    Background info: 18/19, at uni, never had a boyfriend, virgin and so very little guy experience. I'm actually sociable and normal-not like some kind of overt freak or anything like that so any info on how NOT to fall for guys so hard and see them as just friends and/or strangers rather than potential boyfriends?
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    As long as you're not parked outside their flat in a transit van with recording equipment it's not the end of the world- perhaps it's just in your nature to want a relationship, and thus it would follow that you would think about it. Whenever it happens just take a step back and remind yourself of the reality of the situation, then fire up a casual chat and see what happens!
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    It doesn't matter what you think about, as long as you realise that your behaviour cannot reflect this. If you can stay cool on the outside, it doesn't really matter how crazy you are on the inside
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    Well why not persue them as potential boyfriends, rather than treating them as an unobtainable object of desire?
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    (Original post by Steezy)
    It doesn't matter what you think about, as long as you realise that your behaviour cannot reflect this. If you can stay cool on the outside, it doesn't really matter how crazy you are on the inside
    True but you know what they say about guys being able to smell desperation a mile off.

    The advice so far has been pretty good and eye-opening though, keep it up!
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
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    You answered your own question.

    Get a boyfriend, get laid, get some guy experience. Once you learn the harsh reality that most guys simply aren't worthy of dwelling on you may improve and stop thinking about them so much.
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    Strike up a conversation,
    I know it can be scary at first, but 9/10
    people respond well.

    Life's too short to admire from afar.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I do. Luckily I'm a girl and so can't really be considered stalker-ish but often I admire guys from afar and obsess over them for ages and imagine what its like being with them etc when we have barely even spoken to each other. I think its creepy and if anyone else did this with me then I'd have to file a restraining order so I don't wanna do it to anyone else. Also sometimes I'll obsess over Guy A and the very next day want Guy B-so this obsessing will never get me anywhere with guys since I obsess about quite a few and none are as good as the next guy I might fancy.

    Background info: 18/19, at uni, never had a boyfriend, virgin and so very little guy experience. I'm actually sociable and normal-not like some kind of overt freak or anything like that so any info on how NOT to fall for guys so hard and see them as just friends and/or strangers rather than potential boyfriends?
    OMG I think I may have written this thread without realising it. I'm almost exactly the same as you, OP. There is this one guy I obsess over and Facbook stalk (:o:) and am always imagine what it'd be like to be with him. Haven't seen him in almost 9 months though and I bet if I met him again the reality wouldn't be the same. I think I'm just in love with idea of being with someone, rather than this particular guy, if you know what I mean - this could be you too.

    In conclusion, we just need to get ourselves a real man and the issue will be solved.

    Shame it's not that easy
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    True but you know what they say about guys being able to smell desperation a mile off.

    The advice so far has been pretty good and eye-opening though, keep it up!

    This is so funny because you don't realise how many guys are exactly the same. If all admiration was suddenly visible, there would be a lot of surprises!

    And about the desperation thing - if a girl came up to me who I obviously knew liked me, I'd be flattered and it would either make me interested back or would make me friendly with them. If a guy blanks you or is negative back I would seriously not worry, that's their problem (cliche but true!)
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    Haha, yeah this is pretty much what I feel. And from talking to a few friends, with lack of great guy experience when they were younger, they always see 'potentials' in guys too. I guess, as everyone says we just need to get out there, keep busy + if we're crazy analysing things on the inside, as long as it doesn't affect our behaviour. It is annoying though, I know what you mean. I constantly try to tell myself that what I'm feeling's superficial, and when another guy comes along I'll just do the same thing. As someone else said, I'm pretty sure we just like the idea of being with a guy, not the actual guys themselves.
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    Cool thread. I crush hard too. Waaay too occupied with how things "could be" rather than dealing with the actual situation. I have since decided to get out more and make more of an effort getting to know my next potential crush rather than make up the situation in my head! But I agree, its so much harder not to rely on imagination. Sad.
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    learn balance techniques
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    You give the opposite sex/relationships way too much importance. The best outlook is to either make a move on him there and then or move on as quick as possible because what is fantasizing ever going to achieve?
    Life's too short to be concentrating on one individual at a time, especially if it's only in your fantasy world.
 
 
 
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