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My friends all kept in touch with each other over Christmas but not with me watch

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    Right, will try to make this short and simple...

    So we are all great friends (6 of us in total) and we just got back from the Christmas holidays at uni, and I have had barely any contact with them. I've written on a few's facebook pages, sent them texts (usually me sending first), and now we're back they're all going on about random stuff over Christmas that they all seem to know about each other, which is news to me. So it looks like them 5 have been keeping well in touch, but not with me?! I don't get it, we all get on well, there has been no hostility from anyone, in fact I would even say I am quite popular in the group, but why has everyone else been in touch and not with me? What should I do about this? I don't want to bring it up, but instead I want to think of a way to get integrated well when we go away again, so that they at least want to keep in touch because I thought we were all good friends. :confused: They all seem oblivious to the lack of contact they've had with me, yet they all keep talking about stuff that each of them did over Christmas...
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    Maybe they just don't like you but instead of casting you out the harsh way they're gradually drifting apart? :dontknow:

    I'll be your friend :wavey:
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    Maybe it's just slight paranoia or maybe they feel you haven't made any effort with them? Forget about it because it will only consume you and just enjoy yourself!!
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    Maybe u should try being more open with them and they should return the favour.

    BTW has anybody else noticed thats all the replies so far have started with 'maybe'.
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    I sometimes felt this with my friends, and then I realised what it is. I don't like speaking on phones and they all call each other. Texting and Facebooking is one thing, but chatting on the phone seems to be the best way for girls to gossip/catch up. I don't mind really!
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    Maybe they phoned eachother. Texting and facebook pages aren't really enough. Maybe they get on better with eachother. In any case, view your friendships in terms of your personal relationship with an individual. Don't compare.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Right, will try to make this short and simple...

    So we are all great friends (6 of us in total) and we just got back from the Christmas holidays at uni, and I have had barely any contact with them. I've written on a few's facebook pages, sent them texts (usually me sending first), and now we're back they're all going on about random stuff over Christmas that they all seem to know about each other, which is news to me. So it looks like them 5 have been keeping well in touch, but not with me?! I don't get it, we all get on well, there has been no hostility from anyone, in fact I would even say I am quite popular in the group, but why has everyone else been in touch and not with me? What should I do about this? I don't want to bring it up, but instead I want to think of a way to get integrated well when we go away again, so that they at least want to keep in touch because I thought we were all good friends. :confused: They all seem oblivious to the lack of contact they've had with me, yet they all keep talking about stuff that each of them did over Christmas...
    Yo, I feel exactly like this! They've even got a house together, man!

    :sigh: tbf I don't spend as much time with them as they do with each other, which is probably exacerbating the distance between us. :cry:
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    sounds like they are closer with each other than with you, it happens friendships are just weird don't worry, are you one of the quietest..
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    If you haven't contacted them then maybe try that, if you have and they ain't replied then they are not friends.
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    I use people at Uni ahaha !!

    Gets me by ROFL !!
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    niall??
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    Don't worry OP, sometimes things like this happen for no apparent reason. I doubt it's a conscious, "oh, let's leave her/him out" thing - they may naturally just have found themselves in touch with others. For example, I contacted one friend a lot more than others over xmas as a couple of things reminded me of him, so I'd obviously text, which would turn into a phone call... that kind of thing. It didn't mean that I wasn't thinking of my other friends, I'm just a bit lazy and don't ring round everyone every couple of days to see what they're up to.

    I assume you all went home for xmas? Do they all live quite near to each other (would be a large coincedence), or did they stay in halls over xmas for any time?

    OP I'd make more of an effort yourself. I'm not sure if you're the type who sits around and wonders why nobody's contacting them, but I can have a touch of that if i'm a bit down, and it's obvious - communication is a two-way thing. Don't take it personally, but I would try to change it as it's bothering you (understandably). I wouldn't bring it up with them, either, as it may just make them feel bad and perhaps obliged to text you next holidays, which isn't the kind of relationship you want.

    All the best OP x
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    I've experienced this problem before. It was a horribly huge group and I felt kind of left out sometimes. But eventually, it turned out that they didn't really like me and so I just left their group and found new friends. It was a very very tough time - but I got over it. I hope that you are not in one of my situations anyway. Try and act normal...only time can tell, not TSR.
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    It may not be that they don't like you, just that they feel closer with one another. Maybe it's time to find some new friends?
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    dont let it bother you, if it carries on or they ignore u or make u feel left out dont go mad about it and ask them but not in a angry way tell them how u feel and ask if they wanna be mates anymore

    i will be yre friend too lol
    • #1
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    #1

    Ok to clear a few things up...

    I am not quiet. In fact I'm one of the loudest, most talkative. I think I'm seen as 'the funny one' of the group, so maybe that's why they haven't contacted me, because they're only able to have a laugh with me? I always make them laugh and I wouldn't think they'd say a bad word about me (hopefully). In person, we get on great. But it's just that when I'm not there they don't really make the effort to contact me, it was always me to them, never them to me.

    We are getting a house next year so I don't think they don't like me.

    I think I've made a lot of effort. In fact, as I've said it's always me contacting them, planning stuff with them etc. I'm starting to think maybe they just think I'll always be alright/be there so they don't feel the need to contact...? Which I think is pretty ****, to be honest.
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    I am *so* subbing to this thread! :excited:
    • #1
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    Any more thoughts on this? Starting to get quite down about it..
 
 
 
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