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Found my Dad watch

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    HAHAHAHAHAHAHA....LOL.

    So wait, let me get this straight. Your dad left you and he still bought birthday and xmas presents...WOW.
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    (Original post by theronkinator)
    I'd check it's actually them first....
    Your sig gave me a headache !


    OP, as many have said I would check to see if it is actually your family.

    If/when that happens, only you can decide whether you want to act upon it or not.
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    OP
    Congrats on getting in touch with your dad
    If he left you as a baby it may not be because he didn't want to be with you or that he didn't love you. You said that he lives in NZ? maybe he honestly belived that you would be better off without him than watching constant arguments with your mom or being a part time dad. Believe me, when you have a father who lives in another country it can destroy a child who only gets to spend limited time with them. As they said they were going to wait till you were 21 maybe they didn't want to unsettle you?

    I would say, get to know him and your extended family by phone/facebook first, then maybe go over to NZ when you are ready. Also a free trip to NZ might be a nice thing
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    (Original post by InvoluntarySlacker)
    They contacted you. :confused:

    I don't want to be a sceptic but have you asked for proof? Are you willing to a DNA test? It's better to be safe before flying thousands of miles to a potential trap in a foreign country.
    This.
    It sounds a bit too fairy-tale like to me :confused:
    If you do go, make sure someone goes with you. They may be your family but you have never met them before in your life.
    Phone calls are good as well. Talking first See if you can get him to come to the UK to meet you and then later go to NZ?
    I'm happy for you, OP, and I hope it all goes well
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    (Original post by Spinnerette)
    It's her paternal father.
    As opposed to...? :p:
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    Something like this happened to me!!! Last easter, after many years of searching I finally managed to track down my mum's mother (she was adopted as a baby)! We didn't know how we should contact her... so i typed her name in on Facebook...her son's name came up. (It was her son as I found his birth records etc.)... - the internet is very useful for stalkers

    I emailed him asking if his mum had had a child in england in the late 1950s...and he didn't know a thing about it. But he asked his mum and she told him the truth...

    Since that easter, i met her best friend in Germany who gave us the money to go visit my grandma in California - BEST EXPERIENCE EVER. And i also met my uncle, aunt and cousin It was really awesome gaining new family.

    So.... i don't think it is a scam... what would they gain from it ?! I think you should talk to your Dad, if he wants to talk to you...what is the worst that could happen...? it is just a phone call, it will either change your life or not, if you don't like what he has to say... carry on living your life. There is no harm in trying. GOOD LUCK and i'm really happy for you
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    The same thing happened to me. My Dad left before I was born and suddenly 18 years later I got a letter from him. I ignored this as I didn't know what to do and was so confused. He then found me on facebook and we started talking. It's been over a year now and I still haven't met him but things are going pretty well. He's really rich and sends me loads of money and presents hehehehe!
    I think you should talk to him via email for at least a few months before you fly all the way out to New Zealand. Believe me I know how scary it is to be missing one part of your family and all of a sudden they're there! Don't move to fast. Give yourself some time and find out what he's like before you meet him. PM me if you want to talk more good luck xx
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    (Original post by InquilabZindabad)
    As opposed to...? :p:
    Ha I meant maternal my bad XD
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    I would say aslong as your safe go for it. You've got nothing to loose by going to meet them but maybe so much to gain!!
    People make mistakes in their lives, there is always time to change.
    You must feel so odd at the moment, i hope you go out there and find another part of your family that you will have many happy years with in the future.
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    (Original post by aeonflux)
    A potential trap? Its NZ not Somalia, I don't think they're going to be holding her at gunpoint.
    :rofl: REP!
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    (Original post by Spinnerette)
    Ha I meant maternal my bad XD
    not 'biological'? :p:
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    (Original post by InquilabZindabad)
    not 'biological'? :p:
    I don't know anymore, you pick XD
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    I don't have advice, but congrats on finding your family, sounds like a lovely story
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    If you do decide to meet him then I don't think you should go to New Zealand by yourself, take a friend or someone supportive e.g. aunt/ mother.

    Also, I really don't think you should stay with him while you're there as that could make it more awkward and pressurised - plus it puts you in a very vulnerable position, you would be the guest and so he would definitely be in the position of power. he would be surrounded by all his family and in his home environment. You would be the guest and in a country without anyone to help you and wayyy out of your comfort zone. Even if he does genuinely want to meet you and be a good dad then this environment could still create problems and you could end up feeling very uncomfortable. Even if you have a minor dispute about something, the fact that you're in his house with his rules and his family could leave you feeling very isolated.

    Maybe try to get an open ticket so you can change your flights and come home early if you need?

    I haven't been in your position but I'd imagine it could go wrong quite easily, try not to build up your hopes and have too many expectations, it could all be very disappointing if he turns out to be a knob.

    Other than that.. good luck, I hope it goes well if you go ahead with it. Personally I think he's been a bit selfish asking you to go there and thus knowingly potentially putting you in an uncomfortable situation, if he wants to meet you he should come to the UK but I guess it's not really my place to judge. :p:

    I think you should do it, you only live once! Just make sure you're prepared. I hate to sound all cynical and pessimistic but there are loads of stories about people trafficking and girls being tricked into going on holiday to places, only to have their passports stolen and end up working as sex slaves :eek3: probably won't happen, but be careful because some really horrible things do take place.

    P.S. I'm from New Zealand myself, although I've lived in the UK most of my life, and I can assure you it's a beautiful country.
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    Woah thats pretty over whelming !!!
    take it slow and think about what you really want
    Good luck!!!
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    (Original post by Instincts_2012)
    :rofl: REP!
    Cheers :p:
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    (Original post by Spinnerette)
    Why would that freaky? It's her paternal father.
    the fact they kept them all for all these years! just sounds to good to be true
 
 
 
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