Is this wrong?

undecide_1990

Hi,

Im in love with someone i shudnt be (one of my mates) and he knws tht i am. When i told him he was all right with it all but didnt seem to bother him at all.

Ever since i told him we been getting closer and closer and now i dont know what to do because as he is a mate and dont wanna ruin nething. I told his sister and she has said that we make a good couple and the other night told her how i feel about her brother and she was alright with it all. She said that she was glad he had a good mate that cared about him a lot as it would also ensure he would be safe.

Thing is last night when i sent him a text i ended it with love ya and dont know how he wud of taken it and that, i really cant stop thinking about him and wanting to be with him.

Like i say since i told him we been getting closer and closer hanging out more then we used to and seeing each other more often and then when we hug each other it is as if neither of us wants to let go.

Im not gay by the way i think i am bi as have had relationships with lasses last night we spoke about it and he said yeah i care for you two and that and always here for you aswell.

Anyone suggest what shud do? We might be going away together this year?

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Reply 1

Nonbeatific

undecide_1990

Hi,

Im in love with someone i shudnt be (one of my mates) and he knws tht i am. When i told him he was all right with it all and that but didnt seem to bother him at all.

Ever since i told him we been getting closer and closer and that and now i dont know what to do because as he is a mate and that and dont wanna ruin nething. I told his sister and she has said that we make a good couple and that and the other night told her how i feel about her brother and that and she was alright with it all. She said that she was glad he had a good mate that cared about him a lot and that as it would also ensure he would be safe and that.

Thing is last night when i sent him a text i ended it with love ya and dont know how he wud of taken it and that, i really cant stop thinking about him and wanting to be with him and that.

Like i say since i told him we been getting closer and closer hanging out more then we used to and seeing each other more often and then when we hug each other it is as if neither of us wants to let go and things like that.

Im not gay by the way i think i am bi as have had relationships with lasses and that, last night we spoke about it and he said yeah i care for you two and that and always here for you aswell.

Anyone suggest what shud do? We might be going away together this year?

Maybe you could stop saying "and that"? :p:

Reply 2

undecide_1990

Neone suggest what cud do?

Reply 3

RahRah09

Okay so you're a guy? And this (straight?) guy you love, isn't very bothered by the fact that his bi mate is perving on him.

So far, so good.

Well, if you've been getting closer (and that) then maybe he's curious. Remember, if he kisses you it could be because he just wants to experiment. So beware. Seeing as he already knows you like him, then wouldn't he have gone for it already?

Reply 4

punkyrocker

undecide_1990

What did he reply? Did he say that he only thought of you as a friend, or that he had feelings for you too?

As for 'going away together', I'd only do that if he has feelings for you too, otherwise it's unfair on both of you and you're only clinging to a false hope.

Reply 5

amrh

You need to find out whether he is willing to (for want of a better way to say this) be gay for you. Gay/bisexuals liking straight people isn't uncommon but I've seen situations like this end in tears.

Reply 6

RahRah09

amrh

Big, deep puddles of tears. The kind you lose your wellies in.

Reply 7

undecide_1990

He said that it was not a bother to him when i told him and was fine with it all he didnt say anything about seeing me as just a mate. When we go on hol there will be other ppl going with us but just wondering what i shud do if nething? like i say we been getting really closer lately with each other and he is wanting to meet up on weekends all of a sudden and that (we never used to do that) like last week he asked if we cud go someone last weekend but we cudnt as he had something to do last minute and he wants to do something again this weekend.

????

neone?

Don't know if this is any help but, as a straight guy I would be pretty freaked out if one of my friends came onto me or told me that he loved me with a straight (read: not laughing) face. So the fact that your mate was okay with this is a good start. Can't speak for all straight guys though so... y'know... just something to bear in mind.

Reply 11

stevo23e

yeah you should be quite chuffed that your friend was not completely freaked out, but without even mentioning the huge problem of his sexuality i hate to break it to you but if you pour your heart out to someone and there main response is "thats not a problem" there absolutely no indication of romantic interest,if there was he would have said along the lines of "i dont know how i feel".

hes a mate,mates care about each other and hang out, the fact that he wants to hang out does not at all suggest that he wants to romantically be with you. BUT by the way youve interpreted these things its easy to see your going to cling to false hope for as long as possible,we've all been there, searching for meaning in the smallest thing that could possibly vindicate not giving up.Unfortunately i dont think anyone can give you advice that will lead to the result you want, cos that aint gonna happen.

Sorry for the pessimism but good luck anyway, hope im wrong

Reply 12

Lust of a Gardener

I struggled to read that. I have to admit, it was terribly boring.

My advice:

Get him drunk, make an advance, then let nature carry you the rest of the way.

Easy.

Reply 13

undecide_1990

ah when i told him at first he said that he didnt know what to do.

Reply 14

undecide_1990

so in conclusion then what shud i do?

Reply 15

_Demosthenes

Try to forget about it?

Although I know from experience how horrible it is liking your straight best friend. It suuuuuuuuuuuucks

it does indeed

undecide_1990

it does indeed

Well, what you gonna do then?

Reply 18

undecide_1990

dunno tbh what can i do?

Reply 19

RahRah09

undecide_1990

dunno tbh what can i do?

Well, you need to work out whether or not he's interested in you. Or boys in general for that matter.

And whether or not you like him enough to pursue this.

And if so, how you're gonna do it.