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My own personal brand of supervirginity watch

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    I know that virgin threads are a dime a dozen here but I think my case is just a little bit different. Prepare yourselves for a long read:

    I am 21, male and in my second year at a top 10 uni.

    I do not classify myself as an ordinary virgin who simply hasn't made the final leap in their romance career. Oh no- I haven't done a thing, among others:
    -Slept with a girl
    -Kissed a girl
    -Held a girl's hand
    -Gone on a date
    -Asked a girl out
    -Flirted (at least I wasn't aware if any was going on)
    -Been drunk, tried tobacco or drugs (this is something I'm actually proud of)

    To put it in the words of Ned Flanders- "You name it and I haven't done it". I am a supervirgin, the very worst kind.

    I don't think I am too repulsive in any way. My face is kind of average but physically I think I am the top of the game- tall (supposedly girls like this, or so I've read), great physical shape (I am a bit of an amateur weightlifter/bodybuilder, and I actually get compliments on my physique), excellent eyesight, teeth and general health.

    Although I virtually lack a social life since I really don't like parties or drinking, I am able to hold a decent conversation (including with females), quite intelligent and don't think I'm completely devoid of a sense of humor. The one thing I do get accused of and which I plead guilty to is that I have a tendency to approach everything in life too rationally (though this did pay off by getting me into a good university).

    The reason behind my supervirginity is in my opinion my complete and utter lack of effort to do anything to "fix" this situation. As I said I lack a social life (I "go out" maybe 7 times a year, mostly student society socials) so I don't interact with many females to begin with. And on the rare occasions that I do meet some, I have never ever tried to "make a move" or hit on a girl. Simply haven't done it even though the urges are there. Throughout my final few years of school and now in university as well (supposedly the "best years of my young life" where the norm is to go out and find members of the opposite sex to have fun with) I just did other stuff and completely cut myself off from a big section of life. No particular reason really other than that I find parties and alcohol uninteresting and I prefer to do other stuff such as pump iron, watch films, do stuff with my computer and cook.

    Finally, the point of this post- the questions:

    1) How put off are girls by a guy like me? As in the reasons behind my supervirginity are not a string of failures (I have in a way been following the Homer Simpson motto "Never try, never fail"), not some massive physical deformity or mental disability and not because of some principles of waiting "for the one" or any stuff like that. This supervirginity of mine is very involuntary, trust me. Just a simple complete and utter lack of effort in this field of life.
    Is this seen as freakishly strange considering my "old" age and hence off putting?

    2) Am I a rare breed or are there other such involuntary supervirgins out there who are in this situation because of a simple lack of effort?

    2) Am I a rare breed or are there other
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    The fact that you are proud that you haven't tried things is pathetic. Its ok to not do these things but to be proud of it says yours a pretentious little prick. So first thing is I would drop that.

    Second I would try talking to girls, what else is the ****ing solution going to be? Magic? I don't think so potter, your never going to meet someone if you sit in your room all day with a beaming smile because you avoided anything interesting in the world.
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    very confused as to what you're actually asking.

    of course there are other people like you. but yes that is obviously not the norm and pretty strange.

    if you actually want to change its really not that hard. just make an effort. you'll make plenty of mistakes, but as long as you learn from them you'll eventually get somewhere
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    How put off are girls? Well, most will say not at all, in reality however they will have to teach you everything and you'll make rookie mistakes. Not attractive by 21. Secondly you sound a bit socially awkward, not really attractive.

    Are you a rare breed? Yes. I would say so, although being TSR I expect a long line of "im also a virgin at 21" peoples...
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    You sound to follow the same criterea as me, except im 20, and have been drunk before.

    It definately does get annoying, being in our situation, i admit.
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    Bloody hell , how the **** are you not going absolutely MENTAL ?
    Parties , alcohol , getting off , etc , is AWESOME
    You need to gtfo TSR and go shag someone NOW.
    It's not cool that you've done none of these things since you're not even using religion or anything as an excuse , you just sound like a bit of a square.

    Edit - I've just read back what I wrote and omg I sound angry .
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    (Original post by goodmen)
    The fact that you are proud that you haven't tried things is pathetic. Its ok to not do these things but to be proud of it says yours a pretentious little prick. So first thing is I would drop that.

    Second I would try talking to girls, what else is the ****ing solution going to be? Magic? I don't think so potter, your never going to meet someone if you sit in your room all day with a beaming smile because you avoided anything interesting in the world.
    Why should he not be proud that he hasn't tried drugs and tobacco? It's hardly pretentious to say that he's glad that he hasn't, it's abundantly clear in our society that the ills that these two vices often cause...and from personal experience they are hardly interesting in themselves. And it's probably not what's ruining his love life.
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    One thing i should ask: are there many girls at your uni or on the courae your doing?

    What are you studying and where are you studying it? ( im thinking maybe your doing a course mainly male dominated)
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    (Original post by Winnieee)
    Bloody hell , how the **** are you not going absolutely MENTAL ?
    Parties , alcohol , getting off , etc , is AWESOME
    You need to gtfo TSR and go shag someone NOW.
    It's not cool that you've done none of these things since you're not even using religion or anything as an excuse , you just sound like a bit of a square.

    Edit - I've just read back what I wrote and omg I sound angry .
    Hush hush, 15 year old.
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    Basically the root of your problem is your not sociable. Get out there for crying out loud. 7 times a year:lolwut: are you afraid of sunlight?
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    Put yourself out there bruh.
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    I wouldn't say that not having done those things is unattractive, there certainly isn't anything attractive about getting drunk and sleazing around. It just happens that those are the two main ways in which young men get most of their experience with the opposite sex. If you haven't found the person who is right for you, then you're not missing out on an awful lot by not having had much female contact.
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    I would :awesome:


    What.
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    It doesnt mean you're a 'freak' or a 'weirdo' because you dont got out to clubs or get drunk, there are plenty of people in the world out there that enjoy staying in and chilling out. Unfortunately for you, being a uni you are in an environment where the vast majority see it as the norm to go out on the lash every week. Once you get past university and out into the real world you will find that so many people think the same way you are.

    About the virginity thing, people definately blow the whole sex issue out of proportion. Once you find someone that you like and theres mutual feels there they wont care. So try not to worry
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    1. From my experience, girls aren't necessarily put off by the fact that you haven't done anything. What puts girls off is when you (I use this in a generalised way) flaunt the fact that you're a virgin. Desperation is the Number 1 Turn Off for a lot of girls.

    2. I don't think 'supervirgins' (love the term, by the way) are as uncommon as you think. A lot of guys just don't admit it.

    I'm a very firm believer of the 'when it happens, it happens' ideology. Of course there are more things you could be doing to increase your chances, but you don't necessarily need to be on the constant look out for someone to have sex with you. Also, if you're not used to flirting, you can often miss opportunities.

    I would say, however, to try and make more of an effort to go out more. You don't have to go and get wasted, but try and go to more student socials. Join a couple more societies. Not necessarily those that you know will be full of boys, but others. You say you like cooking; maybe look for a food society or something like that? I'm sure there'd be plenty of girls there. Or perhaps a sports club? Your uni might have some joint socials with girls' teams where you could meet people. If not, try going out with some friends to smaller bars or pubs. You don't have to drink, and it might be quieter there and would enable you to meet some girls more easily.

    You're not a freak, and you seem like a nice guy. It's just a case of leaving all your misgivings behind, forget the whole 'supervirgin' thing and just get on with things
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    (Original post by PearlyWhites)
    Well you sound alright, but why don't you go out much?
    I find parties really boring. Its very difficult to talk to people when there is loud music blazing into your ears.
    And if I do make it to a social outing and the music isn't too loud, I just don't know how to approach girls. I am at a loss at how to get things started.

    (Original post by bloomblaze)
    One thing i should ask: are there many girls at your uni or on the courae your doing?

    What are you studying and where are you studying it? ( im thinking maybe your doing a course mainly male dominated)
    I am at a top 10 uni, not going to give any more info than that. The course is generally business but I'm focusing on finance modules. There are lots of girls in my uni and on my course, some of them are quite attractive. Though I am obviously not going to walk up to them and say "Hey, you look good. Lets go out".
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    (Original post by pigwigeon)
    1. From my experience, girls aren't necessarily put off by the fact that you haven't done anything. What puts girls off is when you (I use this in a generalised way) flaunt the fact that you're a virgin. Desperation is the Number 1 Turn Off for a lot of girls.
    Well obviously I am not going to present my romantic CV to any potential mate I meet. But at the same time I don't plan on being too secretive about my past either. I was just thinking that when guys get to a certain age, girls expect them to have a certain set of skills and experiences.
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    The problem with the way you're going is that 'learning' to be sociable takes a long, long time and a lot of practice. The 'popular' people have a natural disposition towards being social, and so have their entire life as practice, which is going to be hard for you to make up for. I started making a conscious effort at going out when I was 14, and it took me a while to become 'popular' and get a hot girlfriend, etc. so that it now comes naturally. You'll probably have a lot of trouble at the beginning.
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    If you don't try, nothing will change. If you know what the problem is but are willing to do nothing then why complain about?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Well obviously I am not going to present my romantic CV to any potential mate I meet. But at the same time I don't plan on being too secretive about my past either. I was just thinking that when guys get to a certain age, girls expect them to have a certain set of skills and experiences.
    I think your correct in that last sentence. What does other people think??
 
 
 
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