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My own personal brand of supervirginity watch

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    (Original post by Vitamin Sea)
    Sounds like you're just scared to put yourself out there in fear of being rejected and have consequently gone the other way
    Yes, probably true. As well as a lack of skills to even get to a position where I could potentially be rejected (you have to ask the girl in order to get a rejection or approval).
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    Do you think you will marry the way you are going? It aint 1955? (arbitrary, I know)
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    Get drunk.

    All the others will follow...in the same night. :sogood:
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Yes, I really do feel the need to get laid. Not desperately enough to go to a call-girl or hump the first drunk girl than I meet but this is something I really do want to do.
    And it isn't just the physical part but also the emotional one. I imagine it would be nice to have a girl with whom I can go out with, with whom I can eat dinner and then cuddle her in my arms while watching a film. This is not purely about the act of sticking an object of mine into the certain location of a female, there is so much more to it. I feel as if there is a huge section of life that I am missing out on.

    And the peer pressure is very present and unlike the peer pressure to drink, this is one issue where I am in complete agreement with those pressuring me. However at this point I fully recognize that what I am doing with my supervirginity is absolutely pathetic and at my age I really should be having fun with girls (not only the physical part). Heck, even my own dad occasionally pokes a joke at me for never having had a girlfriend.
    Oh ok. So you're looking for emotional attachment. Do you want a girlfriend? Or specifically sex? Think of all the other things you've (presumably) done in your life to compensate for this. For example, I focus on my academic, sporting, business achievements.

    For example, I'm at a top 10 university like you and am quite a work/career-focussed person so I'm revising at the moment and hardly ever go out (like you) apart from to a few society dinners and recruitment presentations. Also, most of my interests are quite stereotypically male (so don't encounter that many women) - like cricket, snooker, online trading, computer games, political discussion etc.

    Do you really find the 'peer-pressure' to be there? Within my circle of friends we don't really discuss things like virginity and I'd have no qualms in stating that I was one (even though I presume most people just don't mention it). If people want to make a judgment on you that's their issue rather than something you need to fix.

    I don't think there's a specific age when you should be having fun with girls. It's just your business ultimately. Either way, I don't think that virginity is something to be particularly hung-up about. After all, surely nobody's likely to ever directly ask you about it?
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    (Original post by lefneosan)
    Do you think you will marry the way you are going? It aint 1955? (arbitrary, I know)
    At the current rate I'm going, I wouldn't be surprised that my business card would read "Vice-President (FTSE 100 firm)" before I ever kiss a female.
    (Original post by effofex)
    Oh ok. So you're looking for emotional attachment. Do you want a girlfriend? Or specifically sex? Think of all the other things you've (presumably) done in your life to compensate for this. For example, I focus on my academic, sporting, business achievements.
    Well I'd like both- physical and emotional. And yes I have put a lot of effort into the very areas you mentioned to compensate for my lack of achievement in romance.

    (Original post by effofex)
    Do you really find the 'peer-pressure' to be there? Within my circle of friends we don't really discuss things like virginity and I'd have no qualms in stating that I was one (even though I presume most people just don't mention it). If people want to make a judgment on you that's their issue rather than something you need to fix.

    I don't think there's a specific age when you should be having fun with girls. It's just your business ultimately. Either way, I don't think that virginity is something to be particularly hung-up about. After all, surely nobody's likely to ever directly ask you about it?
    Yes, the peer pressure is there in a very direct form. I got together with some old classmates/good friends of mine and the entire night they were ripping on me for my lack of experience. It wasn't mean or nasty but it was honest. Of course not all my friends are like this but trust me the pressure is there. One must live under a much bigger rock than me if one is to say that they've felt no pressure to go hook up with hot girls.
    And nobody probably will ask me directly "are you a virgin" but if I ever do meet my first girlfriend, it will probably be blatantly obvious that I have no experience and very little knowledge of romance.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I think its better than having glasses. I am not putting down people with glasses or anything, a lot of my own friends wear them, its just that I like being in good health and hopefully that will score me some extra points with the ladies.
    Think about your personality....I actually find glasses quite attractive and having short sight isnt really going to negate from health nowadays. People wear contacts and glasses to correct sight and arent going to get weedled out through the survival of the fittest.

    Having good sight is convenient for you, but it doesnt score any "attractive" points.

    However, being an interesting person who is spontaneous and takes a few (small) risks is definately attractive. Trying new things and being adventurous with your interests makes you appear a much nore rounded person.

    Whilst you have said that you are "logical", please try not to appear/behave too predictably, as the word "boring" spring to mind, even if you aren't. I'm not saying, blow hot and cold (or not being nice), but you may be in danger of entering and never leaving "the friendship zone" if you are a nice guy, but lack the charm/flirtatiousness/cheekiness for women to get excited about.

    Basically, stop thinking about the physical so much if you're sorted, you go to the gym and you're healthy. Obviously make sure you dress nicely and smell good, but concentrate on what vibes you are giving off and pay attention to your behaviour.
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    (Original post by PearlyWhites)
    Don't listen to him. I've often heard people say this after a lecture. You can say instead "how did you find that?".
    I've heard them too, and I've thought they were morons; it's generally some peroxide-blonde, ugg boot wearing, retarded ***** who says to her friend "Oh my God, did you understand a word he was saying?". I'm saying that the OP should not do or say anything that puts his intelligence into question.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    At the current rate I'm going, I wouldn't be surprised that my business card would read "Vice-President (FTSE 100 firm)" before I ever kiss a female.

    Well I'd like both- physical and emotional. And yes I have put a lot of effort into the very areas you mentioned to compensate for my lack of achievement in romance.


    Yes, the peer pressure is there in a very direct form. I got together with some old classmates/good friends of mine and the entire night they were ripping on me for my lack of experience. It wasn't mean or nasty but it was honest. Of course not all my friends are like this but trust me the pressure is there. One must live under a much bigger rock than me if one is to say that they've felt no pressure to go hook up with hot girls.
    And nobody probably will ask me directly "are you a virgin" but if I ever do meet my first girlfriend, it will probably be blatantly obvious that I have no experience and very little knowledge of romance.
    I'm sure you can kiss a woman in a kinda formal sense at a business dinner maybe? Actually, I'd love to get to MD-level and walk around with a business card saying 'I earn 7 figures per annum and haven't kissed a girl'! I guess that says alot about my priorities in life!

    Did they really rip into you? What if you just told your friends that you just didn't see it as important? I haven't really told my friends but I don't think they would really care. Likewise, if they did, I could just rip into them about stuff like who can run fastest, or who earns the most money out of all of us, and who's the best cricketer, etc, etc.

    In all honesty, I've never felt REAL pressure to hook up with 'hot' girls. I did go to a boys school though. I'm in my final year of university now and have only ever been to a club once, so it's honestly not something that bothers me. I can always just w**k if I have 'urges'. Don't get me wrong, I'm really into things like football, cricket, travel, cars etc. but just not really keen in pursuing women.

    Likewise, if you do meet a potential girlfriend but they take issue with your life choices/experiences, then that's her problem. I for one would not bother changing my hobbies/priorities just because some woman had an issue.
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    (Original post by Notker)
    I've heard them too, and I've thought they were morons; it's generally some peroxide-blonde, ugg boot wearing, retarded ***** who says to her friend "Oh my God, did you understand a word he was saying?". I'm saying that the OP should not do or say anything that puts his intelligence into question.
    I agree. Throughout school and even now in uni, I have always been the person to whom people come with questions about academic stuff. This has actually brought females to me in the past, perhaps I was too blind to see if they had motives other than purely academic ones for coming to me.

    (Original post by effofex)
    Did they really rip into you? What if you just told your friends that you just didn't see it as important? I haven't really told my friends but I don't think they would really care.
    Yes, they really did spend a lot of time ripping on me for my supervirginity. Not in a mean way- they're friends and they just want to help a guy out.
    And it isn't like I go around telling everybody about my status but my closest friends just know this kind of stuff.
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    "The brave may not live forever, but the cautious do not live at all"

    -Richard Branson

    Honestly, if your going to take advice from anyone, its this guy.

    I can get decent grades with minimal work, outstanding if I work hard. But do I want to reflect on these years and think "dam..that was boring, but at least I got a good degree/job out of it"? Hell no. Ide rather have stories to tell.

    The thing is, even if your not physical or very flirty with a girl, its impossible to not do anything, as one will surely like you, and make a move. Rather, its your up-tight attitude, along with your shyness thats stopping you from engaging in a relationship.

    My advice? Let loose, your at uni, get drunk, get laid, enjoy yourself!

    The alternative is to continue being the 'Supervirgin'.
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    'My own personal brand....' - Someone's been watching Twilight :teehee: hehehehe.

    Yeah branding yourself a 'supervirgin' is a surefire way to stay that way.
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    How is a girl going to know, you're hardly going to hold her hand, lean over and whisper in her ear, "I haven't done this before".

    A girls reputation is often very important. If your the virgin on your course that everyone throws condoms at then she's not going to go out with you. If, however, everyone doesn't know that you are an everything virgin, then your fine.
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    Maybe you are just more suited for sports and studying rather than breeding? I don't know, I don't know anyone in your situation and seriously there is nothing to be proud of not to have ever tried any drug or well whatever. Probably you just don't have enough testo to push you or something, who knows, still its not very exiting for girls such guys, you should just give it a try if you want to, in the end you have nothing to lose, do you?
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    (Original post by paella)
    How is a girl going to know, you're hardly going to hold her hand, lean over and whisper in her ear, "I haven't done this before".

    A girls reputation is often very important. If your the virgin on your course that everyone throws condoms at then she's not going to go out with you. If, however, everyone doesn't know that you are an everything virgin, then your fine.
    I seriously laughed at that first part. Of course something like that is probably not going to happen.

    At uni, nobody knows of my conquests (or rather the complete and utter lack of them), its just some of my friends back home.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I know that virgin threads are a dime a dozen here but I think my case is just a little bit different. Prepare yourselves for a long read:

    I am 21, male and in my second year at a top 10 uni.

    I do not classify myself as an ordinary virgin who simply hasn't made the final leap in their romance career. Oh no- I haven't done a thing, among others:
    -Slept with a girl
    -Kissed a girl
    -Held a girl's hand
    -Gone on a date
    -Asked a girl out
    -Flirted (at least I wasn't aware if any was going on)
    -Been drunk, tried tobacco or drugs (this is something I'm actually proud of)
    1) How put off are girls by a guy like me?
    I like guys who are like this, I get that its really easy to not become the stereo-typical student
    And I'm assuming, by this post, that you actually DO want a relationship!
    I dont really drink, as an awful effect on me and whilst I do party, I will either be dancing jokily or trying to have proper conversations with people...

    So long as your willing to trust someone else, it wouldnt bother me if the physical things needed a little work on, actually quite endearing

    But if you want something, relax and maybe act impulsively! Its natural, not something awful!!! So be who you want to be and soon enough, you'll find your niche and someone who likes spending time with you!
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    mild-mannered pete parker, a teenage high school student to whose "self-obsessions with rejection, inadequacy, and loneliness" young readers could easily relate. Closest sexual encounter was from a spider bite. Hobbies include saving fictional childhood sweetheart Mary Jane with his supervirginity powers. Tune in next week to see if he will defeat the green goblin!


    Good luck with your upcoming bout
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    Do you think maybe you spend a lot of time observing life rather than living it? I think you need to get out there :p: be brave and try new things! I dont condone such sins but get a little tipsy now and then ... or go to a party and dance like your on drugs (dont actually be on drugs haha :p:) you'll eventually find a great person but you need to get out there and show the world who you really are! Do you know who you are?
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    You sound fine to me. Uncommon, yes. Off-putting, no.
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    I can kind of understand where the OP is coming from, having a somewhat similar involuntary virginity problem, though not "super" and I have actually done all but two of his quantifiers for "supervirginity", the only ones still to do being "ask a girl out" and "slept with a girl".

    Well actually I did ask a girl out that I had chemistry brewing with when I was in the USA last year. I asked over AIM you see because at the time I asked she was in Boston and I was in New York city for a few days(on a trip) and I had a few weeks left in the USA. On the day that I suggested she said "I have band practice on that day, buuuuuuuut". Woe unto me though! The internet connection that I was leeching off a hostel I was staying at in New York got disconnected at that moment. I really couldnt believe what just happened, I got karma'd for being a leech, and now the girl I was pursuing was going to think I was a massive **** for disconnecting at that moment. I spent all night trying to get a wireless connection again and when I finally did get back online she was no longer there. She ignored me for the next few days and when I retold the story to my Egyptian roommate once I got back to boston he joked that it was god owning me for trying to date a latino.

    Anyway she said she accepted my apology and explanation and over the next few weeks we went back to talking and flirting, and on my last day in the USA I went up to her workplace to give her a small present (I remember her telling me she would love to have one about a month before) and we hugged and kissed for a bit in the cloakroom/supplies cupboard. It could have been so much more, but when I did make the move, divine intervention/karma/bad luck screwed me over.

    To be honest, thats the way it has to be for me, minus the bad luck. I really can't do the clubbing scene as its just not me, the idea of going out just for the sake of pulling just does not sit well with me, too moral/too stubborn about right and wrong I guess.
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    (Original post by goodmen)
    The fact that you are proud that you haven't tried things is pathetic.
    No. He was proud of one thing, that he hasn't:

    -Been drunk, tried tobacco or drugs (this is something I'm actually proud of)

    That is something to be proud of. The last two especially. Why? He hasn't given in to peer pressure etc. and the people at my school get drunk so they can take advantage of each other. That isn't good. And why would you want to do any of the last two? They are out of the question, obviously their not good things.
 
 
 
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