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Can you really just be close friends with the opposite sex? watch

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    (Original post by OrdinaryDay)
    I was totally with you until the last sentence. Now you do seem arrogant.
    and...? Why is it such a crime not to be self-deprecating all the time. I'm not going around saying that everyone thinks I'm awesome or that other girls aren't way hotter than me - that's far from the case! More girls should have self confidence, it gets you a lot further than putting yourself down. I'm not arrogant by the way, just honest. I don't have an inflated sense of self by any means.
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    (Original post by babythestarsshinebright)
    and...? Why is it such a crime not to be self-deprecating all the time. I'm not going around saying that everyone thinks I'm awesome or that other girls aren't way hotter than me - that's far from the case! More girls should have self confidence, it gets you a lot further than putting yourself down. I'm not arrogant by the way, just honest. I don't have an inflated sense of self by any means.
    Because that wasn't just "not being self-deprecating". I agree, you hadn't said anything boastful at all really up until that point, just honest, but talking about your modelling contract at the end like that, just flinging it in with ellipses like that, just seemed totally unnecessary and just a show-off thing to do, really. Having self confidence isn't the same as being boastful. Oh by the way, if I was going to be boastful it'd be about the fact that I'm at Cambridge...

    (that was basically what you did, just shove in an ego-boosting comment that didn't need to be there at the end).
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    (Original post by OrdinaryDay)
    Because that wasn't just "not being self-deprecating". I agree, you hadn't said anything boastful at all really up until that point, just honest, but talking about your modelling contract at the end like that, just flinging it in with ellipses like that, just seemed totally unnecessary and just a show-off thing to do, really. Having self confidence isn't the same as being boastful. Oh by the way, if I was going to be boastful it'd be about the fact that I'm at Cambridge...

    (that was basically what you did, just shove in an ego-boosting comment that didn't need to be there at the end).
    I did it to try and piss off someone on here being rude to me, petty but true!
    But congrats on getting into Cambridge! Don't see nothing wrong with a bit of ego boosting here and there, it's basically what guys do all the time..
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    Almost all of my friends are female.
    Either I have a lot of female friends or am I one lucky son of a *****...

    But to be serious, of course you can be close friends with people of the opposite sex.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    what do you think? or is there alway that more than just friends feeling?
    Is there a different level of friendship with the opposite sex?
    If you have a bf/gf is it awkard to spend alot of time alone with the 'opposite sex friend' than it would be with the 'same sex friend'?
    Everything's exactly the same as a female friend for me.

    Not to mention all the other scenarios that come with it, for example where the gf/bf gets jealous of the 'opposite sex friend'.
    Even though your jut friends, if you slept in the same bed, or cuddled....
    Would having a bf/gf prevent you from doing all those nice things with the friend? So you cant really be close for too long like you would usually be.
    my boyfriend's fine with all of that, he gets that I just get on better with guys.

    Im a girl, and ive had quite a few male friends.. i wouldnt describe them as very close compared to some of my female ones. But recently ive become quite close to one guy, and i want to just stay friends with him ( he wants that too) but i feel like everytime we spend more time together, the more i get this feeling of more than friends. Its not like that with my female freinds even though i spend the same amount of time with them, and they know the same amount of things about me.
    feelings change. You can be close to male friends and stay that way, but you can also develop other feelings. Me and my partner were extremely close friends for around a year before we got together - at first I felt absolutely nothing, we just really clicked as friends but as time went on I developed a real attraction to him. On the other hand I've had male friends that I would consider very close that I've had for years, and know nothing would happen with.

    The reason i ask this is becasue if i have a bf, it would be awkard to spend alot of alone time with this guy friend, so id like to know what you think.
    If you think it would be awkward then your feelings aren't merely platonic. Where's the harm in seeing where things go? it's not like you have a partner atm.
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    (Original post by VoodooCharles)
    I have lots of male friends, and i have a couple of really close male friends who i see as brothers, neither of us feel anything for eachother it wud just be wierd
    They do that because they either are:

    a. covering it up
    b. Recon that they can get a lot better than you


    Men are shallow, we feel the urge to spread the seed on an instictual level. Sozza
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    (Original post by n0c0ntr0l)
    They do that because they either are:

    a. covering it up
    b. Recon that they can get a lot better than you


    Men are shallow, we feel the urge to spread the seed on an instictual level. Sozza
    You amuse me Mr Sex Drive.
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    Possibly.
    Although every guy always checks her out and pictures her naked regardless of how platonic it is. Fact!
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    Of course you can.
    The love you can have for a person of the opposite sex can be purely platonic.
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    (Original post by babythestarsshinebright)
    Oh I'm sorry have we met? Do you know what kind of attitude I possess? Just becuase I'm stating the facts doesn't mean I'm up myself, I don't think every guy I've been friends with has come onto me becuase I'm ridiculously hot or anything, it's probably because they're drunk and horny.

    Plus, if anything, it's the modeling contract that would make me so 'arrogant' not some pathetic guys...
    aww you mad?
    dont worry everything will be ok
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    OP have you considered the fact that he might like you too?

    This is the situation im in

    Thanks everyone for your replies, which is full of a mixture:p:

    Yes i have considered that he might like me too, and im pretty sure he does,...When we first became friends, there was no attraction or feelings of more than friends, i am aware of how this has developed over time. I do think i have feelings for him, but not all the time... as i see him as just a friend all the other times, and i like friendship alot.
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    of course! I have a few guy friends and as long as you draw a line and not cross it that's fine. Guys tend to give better advice to girls than girls do because some are selfish and catty!
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    I don't know.Maybe, for a certain period of time.
    But why does there have to be such a definite line separating a friendship from a crush? The "just" in "just friends" does seem to be a bit unrealistic, feelings don't have to stop at a certain level and not evolve anymore.You may not do anything sexual with a friend and still fancy them a bit, without being madly in love with them and therefore could say it's platonic.Friendship is a very broad term and a close friend can play more than one part in your social life: you might need a confident, someone who showers you with attention, who gives you a feeling of security or someone to fill the role of a potential crush, because you just like the idea of being in love.

    And you might be comfortable with things just the way they are, because you think otherwise it would be too complicated, or think you can do better, or that the kind of relationship that would develop would be too serious for you at the moment. Anything can happen, you can't really say you'll definitely be never more than friends with someone, unless you actively dislike the way they look. Boundaries are really blurry with this kind of things and it's natural.
    This is why I do find close friendships with guys more intense than with girls.They're just less likely to be boring.
 
 
 
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