Hi, I need advice from someone. Ive been with my bf for nearly 2 years and we got engaged in april. He is lovely and never cheated on me or nothing. When we met he used to go out and Id go out and we'd have no problems over it however in the month or 2 before uni started in sept we spent a lot of time together and never saw any of our mates. I dont like his mates as they r a bit slimey and he dont like mine for a similiar reason. In november he started going to see his friends and it has made me v.possessive. He acted strange for a while and so just before cmas i looked through his phone and saw lots of texts of his friends all asking him to go out and him saying he was gutted i made him come in early! When i told him i looked we had a big arguement but since then i just want to look again just in case hes saying more negative things. He loves seeing his friends an still would hate me seeing mine. It dont bother me not seeing mine as long as he dont see his but he does. He dont go out drinking or nothing but the fact that he sees them and talks to them bothers me and i go all cranky and moody at the mention of them. Hes never cheated on me and i dont think he will so i dont know what my problem is or why i keep going like that. Any advice will b really helpful because i dont want him to leave me or just go out to annoy me which would send me over the edge
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- Thread Starter
- 25-01-2010 22:49
- 26-01-2010 01:21
Why don't you see your friends whilst he sees his. Theres nothing wrong with not liking each others friends, and usually a bit of time away from your boyfriend and with your mates is good for a relationship - absence makes the heart grow fonder and all that.
Dont know if I quite understood the situation though, from what I can work out, either you both go to see his mates, but not yours, and you ask him to come home early, or you are at home whilst he is seeing his mates, or tellinghis mates he can't see htem because of you...
If it's the first, then try and put up with his mates for that little bit longer, try and get to know them and give them a chance - but make sure he does the same with your mates.
if it's the second, tell him that it's not fair for him to use you as an excuse not to see his mates, and if he wants to see them, you should let him go (within reason) - remember that any guys mates are an important influnece and can make or break a relationship.
if oyu're engaged I would reccomend that you both try and get to know each others mates - the best man and maid of honour are there for the both of you, not just the one of you.