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My mum won't let us date

She is a Muslim. I have dated before and now I've found out my sister (who's 15) has a boyfriend too. I confronted my sis about this and she said she would tell my mum but it's my mum's fault for putting her in the position of having to lie. She says she's young, and just wants to live life to the full, learning from her own mistakes as she goes along. I'm torn between living my own life the way I want and keeping at bay those feelings of guilt I get everytime I have a drink...date...etc.

Has anyone been in this position?

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Reply 1

theBOON

Well when you have guilt than your not comfortable living that way. You should really think about this and convince yourself if your actions are really good and bad.

Reply 2

Absinth

theBOON

Well when you have guilt than your not comfortable living that way. You should really think about this and convince yourself if your actions are really good and bad.

If her mum wasn't a Muslim she would probably not feel guilty. Guilt isn't a measure of what is right and wrong. :rolleyes:

Reply 3

Anonymous #2

i dont feel guilty about what i do, im dating a guy when my religion says i shouldnt....but then im not being stupid about it and sleeping around and being a slut and getting pregnant...aslong as im being an adult about it and thinking about my future why the hell shouldnt i be happy...

Reply 4

theBOON

Absinth

If her mum wasn't a Muslim she would probably not feel guilty. Guilt isn't a measure of what is right and wrong. :rolleyes:

Tbh I think it's he conscience not her mum. What I suggested was to analyse her conscience and decide for herself was is really good and bad.

Reply 5

Igor00

Is what you're doing wrong? No. Is what you're doing fun, enjoyable, and healthy? Yes. Should you feel guilty about that? No.

Don't rat on your sister, ignore your mother, enjoy your life. Simple.

Reply 6

theBOON

Anonymous

Your fine. You take religion to seriously to the letter. Do you seriously think God will mind you talking to a Guy?

Reply 7

Absinth

theBOON

Tbh I think it's he conscience not her mum. What I suggested was to analyse her conscience and decide for herself was is really good and bad.

Religion can mess with your conscience.

I'd follow Igor00's advice.

Reply 8

Absinth

theBOON

Do you seriously think God will mind you talking to a Guy?

What, Muslim girls can't talk to guys now?

Reply 9

Mona Lisa

I'm muslim too and I've been with my boyfriend (who's church of england) for 2 years and most of my family know about him, have met him, like and accept him cos they know it's pretty serious and i'm not wasting my time, faffing around with him. My mum was a bit reluctant to accept it at first cos she thought I should focus more on my education, but I ignored her, stayed with him and she's come to terms with it. She's met and spoken to him a few times (even when i'm not there) and she's fine with it. Then again, my mum's pretty lenient and lets me do whatever I want cos she knows I'm sensible; I don't drink, smoke or take any drugs so she has no reason not to trust me. If your mum finds out, she'll get over it; you just have to prove to her that you can be trusted.

Reply 10

theBOON

Absinth

What, Muslim girls can't talk to guys now?

Reply 11

Anonymous #2

theBOON

Your fine. You take religion to seriously to the letter. Do you seriously think God will mind you talking to a Guy?

i take religion too seriously to the letter? er no i dont...if i did..i wouldnt be dating?

Reply 12

theBOON

Anonymous

i take religion too seriously to the letter? er no i dont...if i did..i wouldnt be dating?

I meant because you feel guilty for something harmless.

Reply 13

Anonymous #1

Absinth

Religion can mess with your conscience.

I'd follow Igor00's advice.

You're right. I'm quite happy just being free to do what I want as long as I'm not hurting anyone in the process. I feel so restricted when I come home, too many rules and you're made to feel so guilty about everything. Even when I'm on the phone my heart races thinking I'm going to get told off! And I'm in my flippin 20s! I just love my own life without these restrictions.

Reply 14

Mona Lisa

Whoever negged me saying "should've listened to your mum, maybe then your grades wouldn't be so crappy" can go suck themselves cos my grades are good. Jealous *****.