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Girls seeking intimacy w/o sex fast? Watch

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    I'm a guy and I like girls. Most of them. Their behaviour, their looks, the soft skins, how they smell... you get the idea.

    I've been single for a while now and seem to be over my ex. I miss having more intimate contact with women my age, but I don't want to go all the way right away (one night stands/having sex in the first weeks). This seems to be a major problem. I either chat up girls that are not interested in me (sad, but true), want to take things very slow (nothing wrong with that, but just not what I'm currently looking for) or sex right directly (one night stand pattern).

    From your experience, are there actually many girls out there that would like to get more intimate fast for whatever reasons (feeling lonely, to see if it would work out physically, ...), without the urge to have sex? Kissing, cuddling, even spooning/sleeping next to each other would be fine.

    And, if there are - or if you are one of them, how to approach them and make clear what you want (and not want)?
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    When i had boyfriends, most of them wanted sex straight away so i refused, i did accept it once and regretted it. As a result they dumped me. But im glad your a guy like that who's rather wait. In my opnion one night stands etc are wrong, unless your a **** of course haha. All girls are different and the right girl will obviously wait. Believe it or not, some girls are scared to have sex with their boyfriends straight away whether they are a virgin or not, because they don't want to get dumped or hurt........Kissing, cuddling n other stuff can make u wanna have sex but if it happens then its probably meant to be. Hmmm, how to approach girls? Depends what the girl is like, what their attitude is towards you and how much they like you. All i can say is see how it goes in relationships etc. I have been in the same situation as you and it does suck coz i'd never wanna get used for sex! Chin up eyy
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    who'd**
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    (Original post by MadHeadLouise)
    When i had boyfriends, most of them wanted sex straight away so i refused, i did accept it once and regretted it. As a result they dumped me. But im glad your a guy like that who's rather wait. In my opnion one night stands etc are wrong, unless your a **** of course haha. All girls are different and the right girl will obviously wait. Believe it or not, some girls are scared to have sex with their boyfriends straight away whether they are a virgin or not, because they don't want to get dumped or hurt........Kissing, cuddling n other stuff can make u wanna have sex but if it happens then its probably meant to be. Hmmm, how to approach girls? Depends what the girl is like, what their attitude is towards you and how much they like you. All i can say is see how it goes in relationships etc. I have been in the same situation as you and it does suck coz i'd never wanna get used for sex! Chin up eyy
    Thanks for giving me some hope again

    And let me know when you'd move to London and are still single
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    I know what you mean.
    I like that too, but i find cuddling kissing etc will chain react onto other things ... even if you dont want it to.
    any nice girl that you like and get along with should be cool with the innocent stuff, i dont see why not?
    if you're comfortable enough to sleep next to them then telling them so shouldnt be an issue?
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    man, i'm totally like you. i'm seeing someone who i like but don't want a committed relationship from, i just like his company and the innocent groping. i have a feeling he wants something more than the cuddles though, so push comes to shove i'll probably just get off him and go hunting for another. i just got out of a relationship and miss the intimacy, not the emotional baggage.

    plenty out there, search away just mention your intentions from the start. i think it'd be quite nice if guys chat me up just wanting friendly company and not to perv. too much is about sex these days.
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    Yes, some intimacy without emotional baggage (I wouldn't exclude it to develop into more, though). That's what I'm looking for. But I still have no idea how to make this clear. I certainly cannot say "hey, I like you physically, let's start having some fun - but no sex". But without making this clear, they will always assume I'd want sex... like most guys. Sigh.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    man, i'm totally like you. i'm seeing someone who i like but don't want a committed relationship from, i just like his company and the innocent groping. i have a feeling he wants something more than the cuddles though, so push comes to shove i'll probably just get off him and go hunting for another. i just got out of a relationship and miss the intimacy, not the emotional baggage.

    plenty out there, search away just mention your intentions from the start. i think it'd be quite nice if guys chat me up just wanting friendly company and not to perv. too much is about sex these days.
    You should take your own advice :-)

    Tell the guy what you want, that way you'll avoid hurting him later when you reject him, and who knows he might want the same !
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    Hi there. :sexface:
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    (Original post by truthandtragedy)
    Hi there. :sexface:
    Hey there, Sarah. Let me know when you turn 18 :p:
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I certainly cannot say "hey, I like you physically, let's start having some fun - but no sex".
    It gets even worse my friend, I’ve said to countless women “Don’t get any ideas, all I’m offering for now is polite conversation” when we’ve agreed to go out for coffee. It doesn’t seem to deter them at all, in fact setting limits seems to encourage them to test those limits.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I'm a guy and I like girls. Most of them. Their behaviour, their looks, the soft skins, how they smell... you get the idea.

    I've been single for a while now and seem to be over my ex. I miss having more intimate contact with women my age, but I don't want to go all the way right away (one night stands/having sex in the first weeks). This seems to be a major problem. I either chat up girls that are not interested in me (sad, but true), want to take things very slow (nothing wrong with that, but just not what I'm currently looking for) or sex right directly (one night stand pattern).

    From your experience, are there actually many girls out there that would like to get more intimate fast for whatever reasons (feeling lonely, to see if it would work out physically, ...), without the urge to have sex? Kissing, cuddling, even spooning/sleeping next to each other would be fine.

    And, if there are - or if you are one of them, how to approach them and make clear what you want (and not want)?
    You sound adorable, and I wouldn't worry- there are plenty of us out there! :p:
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    Are you asexual?
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    (Original post by fox_the_fix)
    Are you asexual?
    Its just that he has never been properly sucked off
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    To be honest I think that's what a lot of people want. I know it's what I'm looking for anyway- someone who wants to be intimate with me etc but not expecting sex straight away.
    So yeah- deffo girls out there including me
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    People are looking for this, and you must have crap luck if you keep getting girls that aren't either looking for it or very happy to try it. Sounds like you might have to just keep trying until you find someone that likes you and accepts this.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Hey there, Sarah. Let me know when you turn 18 :p:
    :rofl: why 18? 16 should be fine!
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    (Original post by Hippopothomas)
    It gets even worse my friend, I’ve said to countless women “Don’t get any ideas, all I’m offering for now is polite conversation” when we’ve agreed to go out for coffee. It doesn’t seem to deter them at all, in fact setting limits seems to encourage them to test those limits.
    I will keep this in mind. Maybe I should tell them the opposite of what I want...

    (Original post by Witty Username)
    You sound adorable, and I wouldn't worry- there are plenty of us out there! :p:
    Thank you. I think I'm adorable, too. Unfortunately, besides you (and a couple of good female friends) no one else thinks that way.

    (Original post by fox_the_fix)
    Are you asexual?
    No.

    (Original post by Moa)
    Its just that he has never been properly sucked off
    This might be true but, despite of a normal testosterone count, sex is just not the most important thing for me. The character, showing affection (and looks to some extent) are more important. And by thinking of sex as a very intimate activity, I want to know my sex partner. Ergo: No one night stands or sex during the first weeks. I wouldn't want to wait until/after marriage or completely exclude it, though (therefore I'm not considering myself asexual).
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I wouldn't want to wait until/after marriage or completely exclude it, though (therefore I'm not considering myself asexual).
    You can still have sex and be asexual though... it's a lack of sexual attraction, not behaviour (although the two often go together...)

    Anyway, yea, I'd be fine with this. I know a fair few girls who would also.
 
 
 
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