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My flatmates are so dirty! watch

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    Please don't move to another forum, I need to post anonymous.

    My flatmates are so unsanitary its really annoying me. The kitchen and living space is always filthy and horrible. Half of the problem is that they do these huge "family dinners" for about four of them and exclude me (even though I asked to be involved the refused). That hurts in itself because they really are horrible flatmates as people. However I have spoken to them in a polite manner about cleanliness and they shrug it and ignore me.

    Because of the sheer size of these meals and cooking power that goes into them, the mess is like a week's worth of dirt and filth around the kitchen. What I don't understand is why they don't all pitch in at the end of it to clean it all up, and have suggested this. I wouldn't mind if that were the case.

    It's becoming unbearable. I have considered moving flats but I do think its too late to integrate with people after semester one. Should I complain or will they find out its me? Or should I just put up with it?
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    complain, and move. your never going to be friends with these people, so there is no harm in trying to make some new friends.
    or pour washing up liquid, pasta sauce and anything alse i could find all over their rooms(and faces). at least put the dirty dishes under their beds, when they start to rot it will be fun.
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    kick the mo'fos out.
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    yea if you want to get your own back then put the dishes in their room, it will piss them off buttt...
    but if they are generally leaving you out and are quite rude to you then i would deffo swap flats!! you've got 3 years or so at uni so you might as well move now, find new friends asap so that you can leave the horrible ones behind and not have to bother with them! and anyway uni is supposed to be an experience which you love and will never forget, sounds like you've jsut wasted a semester with a bunch of t**** so yea, move!! x
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    I know how you feel my kitchen is a mess. I came back at about 9pm from a mates and was cleaning till 1:45am!!! NOT cool! My flate mates are nice but I just don't understand how the kitchen can get in such a state....
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    Have a serious word with them about how badly it's affecting/annoying you.

    Then if they don't change their ways then move.
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    if its making you so unhappy you should definitely talk to someone about moving and if its possible.
    they sound really horrible and inconsiderate, cant believe they wouldnt let you get involved with their meals... that's so mean!
    dont worry about changing flats, you've got nothing to lose and possibly lots to gain... new friends, tidier flatmates, fresh start.

    hope things get better!
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    (Original post by popple7)
    if its making you so unhappy you should definitely talk to someone about moving and if its possible.
    they sound really horrible and inconsiderate, cant believe they wouldnt let you get involved with their meals... that's so mean!
    dont worry about changing flats, you've got nothing to lose and possibly lots to gain... new friends, tidier flatmates, fresh start.

    hope things get better!
    However I just don't want my old hall *****ing about me, because one of the girls is on my course and in all of my seminars.

    Is it worth it though? I finish in May and I'm not living with them next year (they tried to bully me into getting a house with them as they needed a fourth person. We had some stand up rows about me wanting to pull out as I was unhappy with them/the house/the costs) but I hate living with them now. I almost don't want to feel as though I have to move and to uproot myself for the sake of it.
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    OP, that's terrible!
    I must say in my flat, I'm one of them who really doesn't care that much if the kitchen is a state. It's actually the guys cleaning, and the girls being messy in ours! But we all had a talk about it, and we're all much better now. I don't really understand why it upsets them that bad (it's not THAT bad, and we have a cleaner that cleans up the kitchen every morning. and yes, it's unfair to let her wash up much more than she should have to, so that's also why we've been doing better now)
    But if it means a lot to them, then sure.

    I know how you feel about your flatmates too. I've deliberately decided to live without them and live with randomers next year. Just crossed fingers I'm not going to any worse..

    Not much advice to give you, sorry mate! Try get some other friends in your course and such, that's what I did, and continue to talk to them in a polite way like you say you've done, or else it will just escalate. Trust me.
    Good luck!
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    They see you as a pushover, if they dont clean up do not clean up, just be calm then next year, you move away
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    I have a similar problem, but probbaly not as bad, but my flat mates have damaged the living area a lot, and we're all going to get charged because they're not owning up to it, but they damn well know it was them, they always barge in drunk and dont know what they're doing
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Please don't move to another forum, I need to post anonymous.

    My flatmates are so unsanitary its really annoying me. The kitchen and living space is always filthy and horrible. Half of the problem is that they do these huge "family dinners" for about four of them and exclude me (even though I asked to be involved the refused). That hurts in itself because they really are horrible flatmates as people. However I have spoken to them in a polite manner about cleanliness and they shrug it and ignore me.

    Because of the sheer size of these meals and cooking power that goes into them, the mess is like a week's worth of dirt and filth around the kitchen. What I don't understand is why they don't all pitch in at the end of it to clean it all up, and have suggested this. I wouldn't mind if that were the case.

    It's becoming unbearable. I have considered moving flats but I do think its too late to integrate with people after semester one. Should I complain or will they find out its me? Or should I just put up with it?
    That is disgusting.. try and ignore them let them clean it up you clean what you do up unless they start cleaning yours for you make sure everywhere you go and what you use is clean so if whenever the landlord whatever comes and sees what the mess is they will immediatly see that oh its those pricks... and try and move if you can it probably would be best if theyre leaving you out and stuff...
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    (Original post by Jukukiwaiyi)
    I have a similar problem, but probbaly not as bad, but my flat mates have damaged the living area a lot, and we're all going to get charged because they're not owning up to it, but they damn well know it was them, they always barge in drunk and dont know what they're doing
    They do this too. I mean I'm no social recluse, but I never drink myself stupid and bang about.

    And if I have too much to drink I enter the flat quietly, even with my guests.

    It's not rocket science.
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    No offence but if they're all avoiding you exclusively, you're probably socially retarded in some way and haven't realised it.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    They do this too. I mean I'm no social recluse, but I never drink myself stupid and bang about.

    And if I have too much to drink I enter the flat quietly, even with my guests.

    It's not rocket science.
    That's exactly what i do!! It's no excuse to say "I WAS DRUNK", for being disrespectful, because if you are not drunk enought o collapse on the way home, then you should still be able to realise that everyone is trying to sleep

    and something that REALLY annoys me about my flat mates, they decide to have little "flat chats" in the hall way, right outside my room, even when the kitchen is free, simply because they find it more "cosey", and they talk very loudly, and before they were doing this rom 1am-4:30am. Fair enough it was a saturday night, but 4:30am with one of them sitting on my door even(i opened my door fast at 4am so he fell back though :P my excuse was ineeded some water) is going too far...

    my conclusion is at 18+ years old people should have some damn respect. Fine they can be "nice people" during the day, but this doesn't make them respectful at all.
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    lol and another thing, it satisfies me so much to hear them throwing their guts out in their toilets... xD
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    (Original post by Bubbles*de*Milo)
    No offence but if they're all avoiding you exclusively, you're probably socially retarded in some way and haven't realised it.
    Cheers for that troll. However I have got friends outside the flat, so I can't be that socially retarded. I am only talking about my flat situation.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Cheers for that troll. However I have got friends outside the flat, so I can't be that socially retarded. I am only talking about my flat situation.

    Yeah, I really look like a troll don't I! :rolleyes:

    And let's be real; socially excluded by every girl in your flat, who have all become good friends without you.

    Hmmmm, normal girl behavior?
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    I would advise either talking to someone (a hall warden or something) who can help you out because you're being bullied by them and you shouldn't have to put up with it. I know this is university and you feel like you should be able to take care of yourself but it's a new place and that's why they've got halls wardens. Don't be embarrassed, they've heard it all. Also, please stop doing their washing up and cleaning. Keep your stuff clean and clear a space if you want to cook but bluntly refuse to touch any of their stuff, they should get the idea pretty soon. If they don't (how thick are they?!) then do the good old plonking of dirties outside their room and if they start using your stuff then move it all to your room. Don't be scared about moving and not fitting in, if you get new flat mates then they'll either make friends with you or ignore you (which isn't so bad really). I got to the point of being ignored in halls last year which i actually quite enjoyed because i didn't enjoy hanging out with them. But anyway, there will always be friends you can make at uni so don't worry! Hope things get better for you, and if they don't, then don't worry because it's only 1 more semester to go! It speeds by at the end of the year!
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    However I just don't want my old hall *****ing about me, because one of the girls is on my course and in all of my seminars.

    Is it worth it though? I finish in May and I'm not living with them next year (they tried to bully me into getting a house with them as they needed a fourth person. We had some stand up rows about me wanting to pull out as I was unhappy with them/the house/the costs) but I hate living with them now. I almost don't want to feel as though I have to move and to uproot myself for the sake of it.
    its up to you if its worth it or not... if its making you unhappy to the point where its affecting your work and just generally getting you down, its worth considering moving out. it would be hassle but you could potentially move into a lovely flat and make friends with people you live with, rather than hate them. at the same time, its luck of the draw so you could end up with another bunch of scruffs again unfortunately.

    my advice is to stick it out, like you say you would have to uproot yourself and there's really not too long left til the end of the year (especially when you take into account holidays/study leave).
    if they are really unsociable and unwilling to chat and be civil, eat your meals in your room... or go round to other friends houses when you can and cook together, just like your current flatmates do. im sure your friends would rather you ate with them every now and again then be unhappy at the flat and eating alone. yeah just try not to stay in the flat too much, otherwise it might keep getting you down.

    but try to be civil to your current flatmates if you can. dont be mean and horrid like they are, its pathetic. clean your own things and leave them to do theirs. maybe try having a little heart to heart with them if you feel that you can? clear the air a bit and see if you can build bridges with them, so things are a bit more bearable in the flat?

    hope things get better! if not, maybe try talking to your friends or a counsellor/accommodation person about your problems.
 
 
 
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