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What the hell? watch

    • Thread Starter

    I stupidly drunkenly told my only real friend at uni that I was in love her. First day back she acted fine, didn't bring the 'incident' as it has become to be known up at all.

    Today she was in a mood, wouldn't say why, wouldn't even talk to me. I gave her some space and sat further away than usual, looked over at her every now and again to see if she was alright, even asked if she was ok with which she responded with a stone wall.

    On the way home she speeds off to catch the bus, not stopping or looking back, gets on the bus without me and more or less leaves me stranded. So I had to get the train home and sent her a text saying she upset me and she replied saying that Im more or less acting like a stalker, reading her texts, looking over her shoulder and called me delusional and that we would never be together. I even got the feeling that she'd probably drop out because of it.

    So I tried to defend my self saying I was only 'looking over her shoulder' because I was worried as she seemed upset and that I only want to be friends and that I never wanted us to be together, but she isn't having any of it. Now I think that she is either upset at something else and taking it out on me or just cant handle me having feelings for her, for that I will have to wait a bit.

    But anyway should I apologise even though I think I did nothing wrong? Should I just leave her to it and see if she changes her mind?

    Give her some time and space.
    • #1

    Don't apologise, you're right when you say you've done nothing wrong. Let her know you're there for her but give her space. She's probably just a bit shocked right now.

    I'd reinforce how you don't expect anything of her. Someone confessing they have feelings for you that you just don't return is actually quite stressful and pressure-filled, as then you have to watch everything you say and all the friendly affection you may have had has to be toned down, so you don't hurt them.

    Just send her a text saying you won't overly bother her and you'll give her some space if she'd like, but that you only want to be friends and definitely don't expect anything more of her. Say you care for her as a friend and only want to be there for her, nothing more. And then don't text her more than normal, don't do anything strange, or act awkward - just act normally. In time she'll come round and get over it.

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