Cheated and now tormented by guilt.

My boyfriend and I have been together for one year. He is the most kind, loving, generous person and has treated me so well. Four months into our relationship, we were out clubbing and had a silly argument, which ended up in him going home. I stayed in the club, got very drunk, and ended up chatting to a guy I knew vaguely. He offered to walk me home and as we went past his house on the way and I was really drunk, he asked if I wanted a glass of water, so we went into his house. I sat on his bed chatting to him for a while, and then lay down because my head was spinning; anyway, we ended up kissing but nothing more happened. I thoroughly regretted it the next day but decided not to confess as I knew how stupid and meaningless it was and that if my boyfriend knew, he would dump me for sure.

However, seven months later it's come back to haunt me. At four months I wasn't sure how serious we were and it was all a bit of a laugh to me, but now that we've reached a year I feel really serious about him and we've talked about moving in together and getting married. I would never even consider cheating on him now, but I did when I didn't predict how much I would fall in love with him.

I don't plan on telling him, because I know for a fact he would end it with me and think it was something more than it was. But I've found myself paranoid about things like - what if the guy filmed me in his house and then it gets back to my boyfriend?? What can I do, this is killing me but I CAN'T tell him, so any other advice please.

Reply 1

UKCATrocks

You made a mistake, you learnt your lesson and the guilt you are feeling is designed to make suire you know young is wrong. In a sense, it may be better that you did it, because if anything it proved to you that your bf is the one you want.

And sine you didn't have sex then there is no real harm done. So just forget it, move on and spend your emotional energy on making your relationship work,

Reply 2

Mrs House

You say you don't consider cheating if it's someone you could predict falling in love with.

So with a every partner you've been with, for the first few months, you think it's ok to cheat or you would consider it?

Either way, he deserves to know and you need to grow up a bit