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Being a mature student of 29 who has student friends of under 19.... watch

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    Just my thoughts on what it's like being a mature student nearly hitting 30 being friends with students who are 19 and under...

    Being a typical scouser, I'm bubbly, often crack a joke and mega friendly so meeting new students wasn't a problem for me because I usually break the ice first. The last 4 months I have developed a number of friendships with students who are 10 years younger than me plus one who is just turned 25. They are all from different parts of the country so straight away, there is a difference in types of humour. They probably laugh more at me (in a nice way because im always cracking jokes) than I do at their own attempted humour although one of the girls is Irish and we hit it off quite well and I think that's because of the irish-scouse history connection. Whilst I do equally think highly of them all, there are times where I really love being around my friends near my own age. Like, topics about sex, relationships, problems at work ......these are topics that most people aged 19 have never had experience of so it kind of limits the conversation at times. Plus, what they find highly amusing (like it could be really silly to us old farts) is MEGA hilarious to them and i'll sit there and just don't get it because well, I'm not their age am I? lol

    It is refreshing at times to be with girls who are alot younger than me because they make me feel young at times and they've got a very carefree approach about life unlike myself who has experienced alot of stress and **** since I was 16, hahah, so at times I feel like i'm too serious in my conversation content, BUT, it would not be considered too serious with my friends who are my own age or older.... Then there's going to clubs/bars where it's mostly kids - i'm lucky upto now because we've been to bars and clubs where there is a good mixture of ages, but i've yet to go to the clubs where I KNOW it's going to be mostly 18/19 year olds and I know my student friends want to go there soon. LOL. I remember before I started Uni I was over anxious about meeting new friends at uni because it's such a massive experience for anyone, particularly mature students over the age of 28. I am the only student over the age of 20 in all my tutorials/lectures and most of the time it doesn't bother me in the slightest because im young at heart myself but I have to say that at times I do wish I would meet other mature students around my own age.
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    Age really is just a number.
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    When I was at Uni there were two guys - one of 35 and the other of 40 - on our course.
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    I am the oldest in my [close] Uni friendship group and I have the least experience (i.e. zero) in sex and relationships and I'm not that advanced when it comes to working. We still manage to get along and discuss all manner of things.

    Are you asking a question btw?
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    I am 26 and 27 in a few months and experience a bit of both, I am not technically excluded but neither am I included since if you are over the average age of 23(I say that because thats the average age of uni leavers in my experience)

    You could be a nerd but 18 years old and still be invited out, be a nerd in your mid twenties and be excluded.

    Bascially once in your mid twenties you need to make all the effort to socialise and expect at least a few weird looks but not much hassle.
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    I'm 19. I have 2 or 3 different friendship groups and 1 of which the ages range between me (bring the youngest) and 40. The rest are about aged 30 give or take a few. There are about 8 of us all together. We all met and bonded over a shared interest and I've come to realise age really is just a number. We speak freely about everything, have similar senses of humour (silly and dirty lol!) and even though we've all had very differnet lives - We've got former marines, women who were teenage mums, make-up artists etc etc and obviously we have differences in opinions etc but I've never felt that because I'm younger I've ever been left out and the older members are certainly never left out. We're all actually going on holiday together in October! It makes you realise that there are no huge age barriers when it comes to society - well unfortunatly there are but there shouldn't be! I really think it's an advantage to have mixed age friends.
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    (Original post by Wild_Precious_Life)
    Age really is just a number.
    So there's no difference, apart from the number, of a 5 year old compared to an 80 year old :awesome:
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    I can see where your coming from, im only 21 but ive not gone straight to uni from school, so ive picked up some work "experiences" (eg the crap stuff). And i know that I could discuss much about it to people my own age and for them to flow with it (well uni people any way).

    My suggestion is, try this club out (if you want, dont let them force it apon you). So what if most of the people are "kiddies", there is always a few older people in clubs, but imo all that doesnt matter unless your on the look out for an equally aged man friend?

    At manchester there is a mature students society (they even get their own bar!), see if there is some thing like tht for you, so you can get to know other mature students (and share these problems, as they may of had them their selves).

    Failing all that stick to the rock clubs, always loads of old rockers in there, and some times you might even be in the younger band of people in there! =)
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    (Original post by Wild_Precious_Life)
    Age really is just a number.
    Ah, page one of the Paedos' Handbook.
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    If I were you, I'd get involved with the student union and extra curricular clubs or activities; that way you're more likely to meet other mature students, or at any rate, those whom you have shared interests with - aside from your chosen course.
    I do find the stereotypical views you have about being a Liverpudlian curious though, and you seem to be using that as almost a negative or an excuse for being unable to relate to others who's sense of humour might just be different. I've met quite a few Liverpudlians over the years and this supposed sense of humour seemed to be more of a 'get-out clause' for justifying their delight in being sarcastic or belittling other people, I've lost count of the number of times they said something really offensive but blamed it on their 'Scouse' sense of 'humour'.
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    I know what you mean, but I think its easier than people reckon to muck in with the younger ones. As long as you don't judge them and are patient with them being a bit silly sometimes, or getting worked up over stuff that seems trivial most of them will accept you. I was in my mid 20s when I did my undergrad degree, I'm looking at doing a Masters and will be 30 when I start that.

    You might find that you have more in common with these younger ones than you do other mature students because some of the other mature students might have families and be career changers etc, and they can be more focused on their "home life" whilst just turning up to uni for what they need, than caring about mixing with others.
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    Haha, I'm a Scouser too, but I live in Swansea now

    last year I lived with a 29 year old Irish guy and it wasn't too bad. Aside from the fact he still had the 20 year old attitude of not giving a flying **** about his degree, he was a typical ******** student, doing drugs, stealing everyone's food, being loud til 6am. Couldn't tell the difference between him and the 20 year olds doing the same thing, so no worries :P
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    Some of the biggest legends in my class at uni were the mature students, on a fieldtrip away one of them went to a lock in at a pub and joined us then for work at ten in the morning after coming straight from there!! we had all been in bed by 3am lol. also i'm 20 and get on really well with people that i work with that are 28 and 48, they're just as immature as me!!! it's not about age more your outlook on life and mentality, i know 22 year olds that i can't get on with cos they act like 60 yeaar olds!!!
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    I can see what you mean. Although it is the opposite way around for me, sort of.

    I am 18, I have two close friends who are also 18, the three of us are like sisters. Our main friendship group is almost entirely in their 20s, from 21-32 (average 25 I think, it's a pretty large group though so there are a couple of 30s), we're the only 18 year olds. We've never felt excluded or like we didn't fit in humour/seriousness wise, even though we have much less life experience. We really don't notice age at all when we are all together.

    But when we get back in contact with our old school friends or I meet up with my university friends (18-19), then we do notice. It is different, not entirely in ways you can put your finger on but they are just less mature. I think me and my two friends just grew up faster. We still have fun when we do meet up with our younger (well, same age!) friends and we can be as silly and carefree, but it's not really the same and there are times when we feel out of place with them.

    It's interesting.
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    Amongst my medic friends i'm probably the oldest by a couple of years, doesn't really make that much difference.

    When I did my masters my closest friend was 50, and we get on like a house on fire.

    Not sure that anybody really cares tbh, but people are people for the most part!
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    Hey all

    Didn't expect so many replies, which is great

    I posted that post just mainly because I wanted to give my own personal view of what it's like to be a mature student being friends with students 10 years younger than me.

    There's been some interesting opinions, of which most of them imply that age is just a number. Whilst I do agree with this to a certain degree, what you need to think is that - "would you form friendships with people ALOT younger than you if you were NOT in uni and just going about your day to day life?" - Probably not, and that is the point I was trying to make really. Don't get me wrong, alot of the time we get on well and have a laugh, but I do find at times that the certain conversations we have remind me on a regular basis of the age gap. It's not a HUGE bother to me, i must make that clear, but it certainly reminds me that I prefer to be with my other long term friends who are my own age or older. I won't go into detail because it's personal, but i've experienced heart ache through different reasons- r'ship breakups (not just normal "oh we've fell out of love...blah blah") and other things which most people haven't experienced especially at 19 years of age. So, if I want to talk about my current r'ship problems or bureaucracy at work, etc etc, then to me, I couldn't discuss such issues with them because they have not experienced life like I have - i mean come on, they've only just left home, they've never lived on their own before or paid bills (had the responsibility that most other adults have), had long term r'ships (and in certain cases not had sex), so can you understand where I am coming from? They are a breath of fresh air to me alot of the time and I do have fun with them, but when it comes to real 'life' conversations, this is where the age barrier comes in. None of them understand about painful r'ship break ups so situations like this I will speak to my other mates who are same age/older than me.

    I can't remember word for word what everyone put in their comments, but I vaguely remember someone touched on the scouse humour and how we use this as an excuse for something? I'm baffled by that comment completely.... :/

    I think when it comes to having a fun time and going drinking/on the piss then they are ideal to be friends with, but when it comes to having a good ol' chat about the real issues of life, then this is when I will speak to my other mates. ..

    I am aware that there is a mature students society -thanks for mentioning this, but I don't feel the need to go out of my way and make friends around my own age because I already have a handful of friends who are my age or older than me whom Ive known for years. You see to me, you have your friends who you can go out and get bladdered with, then there's your friends who you can have a great night out with but have really good nitty gritty conversations/debate about eachothers lives, then there's your workmates.....so we have different friends for different reasons and that's the point I was trying to make really. Guys have their drinking mates and they have their close mates who they can talk to about their problems ... etc etc.

    Like, we were watching Sex and the City last night, and ok, most girls would find it funny at any age, but only those who are over a certain age can appreciate the understand of the series - who have had relationships of different sorts - most 18/19 year old won't appreciate it in that context because they haven't lived their life yet, they're still babies! lol lol. Okay, you can be mature at such an age, im not disputing that atall, and they can come out with very wise comments at times which even I get surprised at, but it still matters that there's a difference between having lived your life and the various pains we go through and effectively having a life that hasn't been tested yet. I was a COMPELTELY different person at 18 to what I am now. Like, my mate (god luv her, lol), she lost her blackberry mobile somehow and of course i'd be pissed aswell so can completely understand !! But when it's going on and on a bit, i feel like saying 'there are worse things in life than losing your mobile'. I think i have said that to her in a matey way like, 'well, at least this didn't happen ..' and tried in some way to put things into a bit of perspective (because she was bladdered when her phone went missing and anyone could have taken advantage of her when she was on her own pissed). She doesn't know whether she was robbed and ended up with a sprained ankle and scratches et etc. So i was saying thank god she was ok. But you know where im coming from right?

    Anyway, think i've said enough
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    Ribbits, the comment you made about "But when we get back in contact with our old school friends or I meet up with my university friends (18-19), then we do notice. It is different, not entirely in ways you can put your finger on but they are just less mature", that was exactly what I was trying to point out, lol. Like, they'll giggle and laugh at pretty silly things which I don't get being older - not because im not fun, but because it's just typical young girly sense of humour
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    Sarky - lads/men are considered alot more immature than girls so your comments don't surprise me atall.
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    ceeeeej - I here what you're saying and I agree that you can usually get on with anyone at any age, but what my point was is that would you talk about your problems to people of any age also? Like im sure you have friends who you consider more close than others and who you can talk to about any problems you have, then there are your mates who you can go out on the lash with.....etc etc I can get on with people of any age too - I work for a massive government department and I get on with people from the ages of 18 to 58, but Id only discuss certain things with certain people at certain ages. Like those who are below my age in work - they're a great laugh, but I wouldn't talk to them about my problems because they tend to gossip alot! whereas the older ones (over 35), they understand about what im wanting to talk to them about and respect the fact that I dont want it to go any further so.... Whilst you can 'get on' with people of any age, you can only talk to each age group about different things....
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    Leeming

    Quote: Failing all that stick to the rock clubs, always loads of old rockers in there, and some times you might even be in the younger band of people in there! =)

    LMAO - friggin ell, im not that old in the head you know!! ahahah
 
 
 

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