Turn on thread page Beta

I want to desert them but still remain friends watch

Announcements
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    To be honest, with exams and coursework coming up, I want to be left on my own and leave everyone. Every time, I try and get on my own, someone always sees me and talks to me. I also feel like I am being used, I always help everyone, explain to them what to do in terms of work and that. I don't know whether they are my friends anymore? I get ridiculed or picked and gossiped about. I am normally quiet and reserved, and just feel people are talking about me, and recently found out they do...
    I want to be on my own. I would go home, I hate the nagging, I don't know what to do...any advice? I can expand as well if anyone wants more information.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    Please do expand...
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    Basically, I want be left alone because of coursework and exams coming up.

    It is about this time of year, people who claim to be my friends will come up and ask for help.

    Also, I feel they are backstabber, because they gossip about me behind my back. It is not paranoid. They have. I don't know why or what I have done to deserve this as I am quiet and reserved.

    I hate going back home, to be left alone, I don't get left alone and usually get nagged at.

    Any advice?
    Offline

    9
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    To be honest, with exams and coursework coming up, I want to be left on my own and leave everyone. Every time, I try and get on my own, someone always sees me and talks to me. I also feel like I am being used, I always help everyone, explain to them what to do in terms of work and that. I don't know whether they are my friends anymore? I get ridiculed or picked and gossiped about. I am normally quiet and reserved, and just feel people are talking about me, and recently found out they do...
    I want to be on my own. I would go home, I hate the nagging, I don't know what to do...any advice? I can expand as well if anyone wants more information.
    You should try to be more assertive and definitely you have to stop thinking about what other people think of you - it's just pointless.
    Offline

    12
    ReputationRep:
    If I wanted to do work but someone was trying to talk to me, I would explain to them politely that I am busy at the moment but would like to catch up at some point, and then call or talk to them later when I have more time.

    A lot of people talk behind other people's backs at some point or another, and it's not always malicious. It depends on what they are saying, how often it is, and whether they are doing it to you more than they are to other people. I think deep down you know what the situation is. Personally people talking behind my back doesn't bother me. I take the view that if it's not something they would say to my face then I don't really give a sh** what they think. I have far more respect for people who can be open and honest about things. So if they are talking about you look at it as their problem, not yours.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    local library? somewhere people wouldn't think to look for you? if that fails just tell them you are really busy and cannot help them at the moment. real friends would understand that!
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    Work in the library or somewhere where it is quiet so you can get your work done. If people do come up and try and talk to you, you need to tell them that you can't talk right now because you are busy- I'm sure they won't take offence if you tell them politely.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Butterflyleg)
    You should try to be more assertive and definitely you have to stop thinking about what other people think of you - it's just pointless.
    I do and try to be more assertive, but they stop talking to me. The only reason I suppose, is to make friends- when they are not really. No one wants to be alone.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by thisisyesterday)
    If I wanted to do work but someone was trying to talk to me, I would explain to them politely that I am busy at the moment but would like to catch up at some point, and then call or talk to them later when I have more time.

    A lot of people talk behind other people's backs at some point or another, and it's not always malicious. It depends on what they are saying, how often it is, and whether they are doing it to you more than they are to other people. I think deep down you know what the situation is. Personally people talking behind my back doesn't bother me. I take the view that if it's not something they would say to my face then I don't really give a sh** what they think. I have far more respect for people who can be open and honest about things. So if they are talking about you look at it as their problem, not yours.
    I will try to do that in future. I feel when ever I say this, it gives them justification to ***** about me.

    I don't know what I have done to deserve it. Usually now I stay away from them, they try overtly kind to me, they don't invite me anywhere, etc... but they'll say how i am, etc... and then get into the thing they want, is help. I give it them, cos I don't want to be alone. I don't feel people appreciate for who I am...
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by snowstorm)
    Work in the library or somewhere where it is quiet so you can get your work done. If people do come up and try and talk to you, you need to tell them that you can't talk right now because you are busy- I'm sure they won't take offence if you tell them politely.
    I do try to go to the library, but they always end up finding me, they are usually in the library themselves.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by darkrosebud1991)
    local library? somewhere people wouldn't think to look for you? if that fails just tell them you are really busy and cannot help them at the moment. real friends would understand that!
    I know what you mean, they are not real friends to come to think about it. Then I not really had any real friends.
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    To be honest, with exams and coursework coming up, I want to be left on my own and leave everyone. Every time, I try and get on my own, someone always sees me and talks to me. I also feel like I am being used, I always help everyone, explain to them what to do in terms of work and that. I don't know whether they are my friends anymore? I get ridiculed or picked and gossiped about. I am normally quiet and reserved, and just feel people are talking about me, and recently found out they do...
    I want to be on my own. I would go home, I hate the nagging, I don't know what to do...any advice? I can expand as well if anyone wants more information.
    I know what you mean, this is why I'm excited for university - see it as a fresh new start and meet new people
    Are you going to university by any chance? That way you kind of have an excuse for 'deserting' them?
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by samanthaaaa)
    I know what you mean, this is why I'm excited for university - see it as a fresh new start and meet new people
    Are you going to university by any chance? That way you kind of have an excuse for 'deserting' them?
    The stupidest thing is that I am in university...
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    Which is I suppose strange if you look at it that I am university and this is happening.
    Offline

    12
    Make some friends who aren't on your course and therefore can't ask you for help. If you join a club or society you should find people with similar interests to you who aren't going to use you for your knowledge.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by parpirate)
    Make some friends who aren't on your course and therefore can't ask you for help. If you join a club or society you should find people with similar interests to you who aren't going to use you for your knowledge.

    I not joined club society, i shall look into it. I feel like I am a pushover, and that no one really cares about me, just they care about themselves and use me.
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
Turn on thread page Beta
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: January 31, 2010
Poll
Do you like exams?

The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

Write a reply...
Reply
Hide
Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.