Worried about my best friend.

My best friend is a student, so of course i understand that he drinks a lot. Yet he seems to drink too much, as in, he needs to drink to have a good time. He's in debt, he is working now, but i met a few of his uni friends the other day, who said they lent him over £100 each for alcohol. Whenever he owes people money he gets really upset, and then after a few minutes he starts saying that money doesn't matter, he doesn't care about being in debt, he just wants to have fun and drink.

He wont listen to anyone, and i want to help him, he's my best mate. Any ideas?

Reply 1

Ellie4

2

It's like life immitating art :eek:

(Hollyoaks, to be precise). I'm sure that was immensely helpful :cool:

Reply 2

Sami C

1

I think your only option is to sit him down and have a good chat about it. These things can get out of hand.

Reply 3

Zebrastripes

OP

13

Ellie4

It's like life immitating art :eek:

(Hollyoaks, to be precise). I'm sure that was immensely helpful :cool:

That's actually why i'm watching it at the moment. It may be way over the top, but maybe something useful in there.

Reply 4

JoeCool_Lemming

I don't think there's really much you can do, until he admits it's out of control - you can keep trying to point it out to him, but until he wants to listen, there's not much you can do :frown:

Reply 5

G.A.K

4

Hmm. I'm no expert, but I think the main problem is that he links alcohol in with having fun, and doesn't see that other social events/activities can be just as great without drinking.
I mean, it's his life, and you're a great friend for being concerned, so I don't think it would help to intervene completely, but maybe if you went to the cinema with him or did something that did not involve alcohol (maybe you could make up an excuse as to why you won't go out drinking etc and he'd come). Or maybe, just sit down with him and work out how much money he can have a week to spend on clubbing/drinking. Just emphasize that being overly in debt as a student isn't going to be fun in the long term.

I'm sorry, but I really don't know what to advise. Maybe you could try and see if there are underlygin problems as to why he is drinking, maybe he finds it hard to socialise without it? Or maybe there's a problem he's covering up. Otherwise, just try and talk and tell him it's not fun being in debt, and owing friends, and tell his friends NOT to lend him money?

I'm no expert, but I hope that sort of helps? :smile:

Gemma

Reply 6

happydinosaur

15

JoeCool_Lemming

I don't think there's really much you can do, until he admits it's out of control - you can keep trying to point it out to him, but until he wants to listen, there's not much you can do :frown:

Possibly very true as the current hollyoaks storyline shows. I know it is only TV but it does often imitate real situations when it comes to these issues. If your friend just wants to have fun and drink then thats what wlll happen till they realise they have a problem. Maybe to help it would be best to try and make him see that he has a problem possibly by talking to him.

Reply 7

Zebrastripes

OP

13

gemma.....

Hmm. I'm no expert, but I think the main problem is that he links alcohol in with having fun, and doesn't see that other social events/activities can be just as great without drinking.
I mean, it's his life, and you're a great friend for being concerned, so I don't think it would help to intervene completely, but maybe if you went to the cinema with him or did something that did not involve alcohol (maybe you could make up an excuse as to why you won't go out drinking etc and he'd come). Or maybe, just sit down with him and work out how much money he can have a week to spend on clubbing/drinking. Just emphasize that being overly in debt as a student isn't going to be fun in the long term.

I'm sorry, but I really don't know what to advise. Maybe you could try and see if there are underlygin problems as to why he is drinking, maybe he finds it hard to socialise without it? Or maybe there's a problem he's covering up. Otherwise, just try and talk and tell him it's not fun being in debt, and owing friends, and tell his friends NOT to lend him money?

I'm no expert, but I hope that sort of helps? :smile:

Gemma

Thanks hun, i'll try some of those suggestions. =)

Worried about my best friend.

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