"I'm not looking for a relationship right now"

In my experience, this has been used a lot of times as an excuse to explain why you don't want to go out with someone. Have you ever used this as an excuse before just so you didn't have to go out with someone?

Reply 1

viviki

14

I've used it I meant it at the time I wasn't ready for a relationship at that time, but it has to be partly that person (I don't mean its their fault to clarify). I think i wasn't ready because I wasn't ready with him. You know sometimes when something isn't right and you don't know whats wrong with that person but they just aren't right for you at that time in your life.

Reply 2

SamTheMan

OP

17

viviki

I've used it I meant it at the time I wasn't ready for a relationship at that time, but it has to be partly that person (I don't mean its their fault to clarify). I think i wasn't ready because I wasn't ready with him. You know sometimes when something isn't right and you don't know whats wrong with that person but they just aren't right for you at that time in your life.

so you're trying to find a deep way of saying the guy wasn't attractive enough?

Reply 3

viviki

14

No its not about attractiveness at all.

I went out with this guy who was gorrrggeeeous I mean way out of my league don't have a clue why he liked me. And he was intelligent and had a decent job, fairly good conversation, we liked the same things but something about the whole dating thing wasnt right and it wasnt that I felt intimidated by dating him or anything it just felt like a massive effort all the time, and if it feels like an effort you shouldn't be in a relationship with someone. So thats what I told him, but I met someone else soon after and that didn't work out because they werent as keen as I was but being with him wasn't so much of an effort even though he wasn't as attractive and we had less in common really. DOn't know what it is personality, chemistry between people. On paper the first guy was more attractive (not just physically but the whole package) but thats not how it worked out.

Reply 4

SamTheMan

OP

17

Fair enough... a relationship with him didn't feel right. But sometimes people tend to use the excuse to try to say that they're not looking for anyone at all because they don't want a relationship with anyone.

Reply 5

serious narb

11

i've used the excuse 'i'm already kind of with someone' before even if i'm not, but thats only to like random people who ask for your number. Would like to think i'd be honest to someone if it was a potential for a relationship

Reply 6

bean69

i have used it in the past, which sounds kind of harsh really. but i think its better thatn saying 'i dont wanna go out with you because i dont find you attractive'.

Reply 7

adamu

I am looking for a relationship! Who needs excuses?

Reply 8

Mata

16

I'm looking for a relationship... but only with the right person. I've used,

"I'm not looking for a relationship right now" and
"I'm already kind of involved with someone"

because if you don't fancy someone, you can't just say it, you have to give it some padding to ease the rejection. I would expect someone else to do the same for me, out of courtesy. There's no sense in hurting anyone.

Reply 9

kriztinae

14

never actually used that comment with anyone.
if its a random person in a club/bar i tend to ignore. and if they are persistent i just say im not interested and that usually does the trick.

ive used the dont wanna ruin friendship line a few times, but only when its half true.

Reply 10

_poptart_

2

I have been given the equivalent of that quote a while ago by my ex boyfriend. however I translated it as "I would rather just shag around for a bit now".
Honestly if men only said what they were really thinking hey? :p:

Reply 11

adamu

poptart86

I have been given the equivalent of that quote a while ago by my ex boyfriend. however I translated it as "I would rather just shag around for a bit now".
Honestly if men only said what they were really thinking hey? :p:

oh great another feminist... NOT ALL MEN ARE THE SAME :congrats:

Reply 12

Sami C

1

This thread makes me angry. It makes me angry and desperate. It makes me angry, desperate and horny.....I really should learn to not speak my thoughts...."bye" (In Snake's voice from the Simpsons)

Reply 13

_poptart_

2

adamu

oh great another feminist... NOT ALL MEN ARE THE SAME :congrats:

You shouldnt read so much into one comment you know! I was joking around, of course not all men are the same... just the ones i have met seem to be masters in the art of being an ar$ehole! :redface:

Reply 14

Xx Tomásíona - Mháire xX

14

SamTheMan

In my experience, this has been used a lot of times as an excuse to explain why you don't want to go out with someone. Have you ever used this as an excuse before just so you didn't have to go out with someone?

lololol its not my excuse - its my reality - for me I dont want a relationship I want fun :p:

xoxo

Reply 15

Bape

2

tammy_girl

lololol its not my excuse - its my reality - for me I dont want a relationship I want fun :p:

xoxo

So much for your celibacy vow the! Lol :p:

Reply 16

lostinfantasies

2

I've never used it, but I'm always a bit sceptical about ever using it. You could say that and mean it and then BAM! You fall in love, find that special person.

Reply 17

Agrippina

15

SamTheMan

In my experience, this has been used a lot of times as an excuse to explain why you don't want to go out with someone. Have you ever used this as an excuse before just so you didn't have to go out with someone?

I've not used it myself, but I've had it used on me ("I'm not ready for a relationship yet"), and it really hurt me because the guy made it seem as though he was really serious about me. It came as such a shock :frown:

Reply 18

Saffie

11

tammy_girl

lololol its not my excuse - its my reality - for me I dont want a relationship I want fun :p:

xoxo

Totally agree, I feel way too young for anything serious :biggrin:

I've used the excuse a lot, although at the time it was just to ease the "no I don't fancy you" rejection, it's also true.

Reply 19

khil

15

poptart86

You shouldnt read so much into one comment you know! I was joking around, of course not all men are the same... just the ones i have met seem to be masters in the art of being an ar$ehole! :redface:

Most men I seem to meet/become friends with all seem absolutely adorable! And all of them are intelligent too - so brains and good personality and humour and some of them aren't bad-looking at all! :biggrin:

Maybe I'm just lucky :p:

"I'm not looking for a relationship right now"

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