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age gaps- what is and isnt appropiate? watch

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    Am currently in a relationship with someone ten years older than me, (Im 20, they are 30). I know I am coming up to the point where Ill have to tell my family about my partner, but am unsure how to do it as I feel that they will be under the impression that Im being taken advantage of.
    Many of my friends believe that I should get with someone my own age. As a lot of people on here are around my age, I thought Id get some honest thoughts from my TSR peers, forums tend to make people more honest as they are so anonymous.
    In summary, Id like to know how many of you think that being in a relationship with someone ten years older than you when you are 20 is bad idea, and if anyone has any senisble advice to give me about how to broach the subject with my family, Id be glad to hear it. Cheers guys!
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    all i got to say is good luck telling your parents.
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    http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedi...p-rule.svg.png

    But that is just a general thing.
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    If you're over 18, then age gaps don't seem to matter any more.

    Being 20 and in a relationship with a 30 year old is absolutely fine! I'm sure if you're happy and your parents see that your partner makes you happy, that they won't have a problem with it. At the end of the day, you're an adult, you're not a little girl any more and you can make your own choices about who's good for you and who you want to be with.

    Do your parents know about him at all? If not, just tell them about him, how happy you are etc and don't mention his age straight away.
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    Half you age plus 5 years is the rule.
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    i think it's a bad idea, just being honest. not only the fact that your age gap is 10 years but from 20 to 30 is specially unappropiate, not as if you guys had 40 and 50. just saying.
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    Age/2+7.

    Simples!
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    (Original post by Sakura-Chan)
    If you're over 18, then age gaps don't seem to matter any more.

    Being 20 and in a relationship with a 30 year old is absolutely fine! I'm sure if you're happy and your parents see that your partner makes you happy, that they won't have a problem with it. At the end of the day, you're an adult, you're not a little girl any more and you can make your own choices about who's good for you and who you want to be with.

    Do your parents know about him at all? If not, just tell them about him, how happy you are etc and don't mention his age straight away.
    Exactly this. :yes: You're an adult, so it shouldn't matter.
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    When I was 14 my girlfriend was 13 (few months younger) - therefore I was breaking the half your age plus 7 rule ::p: How sick
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    When you were 10 he was 20. But if you love him and get on with him and think it can work go for it.
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    I know a girl who is 18 with a boyfriend who is 34. If you like him, and he makes you happy, it shouldn't matter
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    (Original post by Prussianking666)
    Half you age plus 5 years is the rule.

    What? so assuming I am 18...I could be with someone who is 14? Nice logic! x
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    (Original post by sundance_kid)
    http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedi...p-rule.svg.png

    But that is just a general thing.

    haha, if you're 50 you are "allowed" to be with someone who is 85!! Can't wait till I'm 50!!

    OP, as long as you're both committed to this, it's no problem.. Your parents might be a bit miffed, but you know.. Can't please everyone!! Just make sure you're on the same page, it's a bit **** if he suddenly wants kids, and you're not ready etc.. My dad got married to a 27 year old when he was 38, and it was fine at first, but then she started wanting kids, and he already had three fairly grown up kids... Ended in divorce.. That's just one example though!!
    If you both want it to work etc, it should all be fine!!
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    I know two people who had eight year differences in their relationships when they were in their early twenties, and no one made any negative comments. One couple now lives together and one are getting married having been together for almost four years.

    Your parents might find it strange at first but when they meet him they might feel differently. Your parents might find an older man with a respectable job more suitable than some alcoholic student your own age! People do say women are more mature and men are more immature so maybe your mental ages are quite similar!
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    OP,
    personally i dont think its the age gap that is the problem in society today. I think it is more how old the 2 people are. i mean there is a 10 year gap you say between you and your partner, but you are over 18 so its fine i think however (and this is true cos its my friends situation) he is 25 and his girlfriend is 16. although its not a huge age gap i think it is frowned upon because of her age. if you are happy then who is to judge. x
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    (Original post by joseph1991)
    What? so assuming I am 18...I could be with someone who is 14? Nice logic! x
    ahh well, prehaps not then.
    • #2
    #2

    I am 23 and my boyfriend is 8 years older than me. We got together when I had just turned 19 and we have just moved in together. My parents were a little wary when they first heard about him but as soon as they met him and got to know him they were fine with it. As someone above said, I think they preferred that he had got all of his 'wild' years out of the way and was settled with a good job and a mortgage.

    Some of my friends found it a little weird at the time but quite a few now have older boyfriends too. The only thing was that he found it a bit weird socialising with my friends, whereas I didn't mind socialising with older people. He's fine when it's a small group or other couples, but he didn't like coming out with a large group.
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    Boy age = X
    Girl age = y

    If Y>X/3*12/5-2 = Ok
    If Y<X/3*12/5-2 = Nope
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    Well I am 17 and I wouldn't text this really lovely guy I met back because I thought he was too old at 21...
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    The half your age+7 rule is ridiculous. OP, if you're happy with him and he treats you right, his age doesn't matter!

    Although I get your problem.. I'm kind of seeing a guy who is in his late 30's. I cannot begin to imagine telling my parents about him, let alone have them meet one day! :o:
 
 
 
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