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Is rejecting people because they have an illness ok? watch

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    How come it is seen as more acceptable to reject a girl or guy because you don't like their looks but it is not ok to reject them because they have say a disability/disease? (eg diabetes/multiple sclerosis). A lot of people are not attracted to me because I don't have an attractive face (which I can't change) so is it any worse rejecting someone who has an illness do you think? Its human nature to choose based on looks so isn't it human nature to choose an healthy mate?
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    some disabilities and diseases i could understand.. but what the hells wrong with diabetes?!
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    some disabilities and diseases i could understand.. but what the hells wrong with diabetes?!
    This. Diabetes? Bloody hell anyone could develop it at any age, its just something you live with.

    Also, if I was in love with someone who needed care and had a disability or ilness and I wanted to be with them, it would not matter what they had. It is the same as if I did not find someone the most good looking but I loved them for their personality- their looks would not matter. So for me the whole thing is N/A as I don't see either looks or illnesses as a need to reject someone. To put it into perspective OP, what if you fell in love with someone then 2 weeks later they admitted they had cancer, would you stop seeing them?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    How come it is seen as more acceptable to reject a girl or guy because you don't like their looks but it is not ok to reject them because they have say a disability/disease? (eg diabetes/multiple sclerosis). A lot of people are not attracted to me because I don't have an attractive face (which I can't change) so is it any worse rejecting someone who has an illness do you think? Its human nature to choose based on looks so isn't it human nature to choose an healthy mate?

    you been reading my old Biology textbook by any chance?
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    actually it is in our instinct to attract the healthiest mate.

    saying that, i guess this is more of an ethical not medical/genetic question.
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    If a burns victim came onto me, I'd be like, "Stop it, not cool. Not cool at all".
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    Yeah mayn, if a wheelchair chick started getting flirty with me and ****, i'm afraid i'll have to push her down a steep hill or into traffic. :rip:
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    i wouldnt reject someone because they were diabetic, my dad is

    i would for other things though

    missing limbs
    deaf
    blind

    etc etc
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    Mental illness is perfectly good grounds to reject someone on unless it's being perfectly treated - I'd never date a bipolar person, for example. Diabetes no so much, my girlfriend is type 1 and it's really not a big deal as long as she takes care of herself.
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    All depends on the illness.
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    Speaking from the other side, I can appreciate why some people would reject someone with quite a severe disability which would stop them interacting normally in a relationship. (although i cant think of very many that are that severe)

    More minor disabilities - such as deafness - which i have. I cant see why people would have a problem. I mean at times my disability is a lot for my boyfriend to handle (having to make phone calls for me etc) but hes willing to do that because he loves me. But if i wasnt able to speak to people in a normal way I recon things would be really different.

    I think it is ok to reject people, but only on the grounds that you feel you cannot deal with the fact that you will be very involved in the disability itself as well as the person. But in saying that, I think its only fair to give it a try if you're attracted to the person, disability shouldnt put you off.

    From personal experience though, most people I know have a something wrong with them in one way or another.
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    (Original post by Cazzi)

    More minor disabilities - such as deafness - which i have. I cant see why people would have a problem. I mean at times my disability is a lot for my boyfriend to handle (having to make phone calls for me etc) but hes willing to do that because he loves me. But if i wasnt able to speak to people in a normal way I recon things would be really different.

    .
    if the lad was not fully deaf, could still speak normal and didnt have to use much/any sign language then it would be ok but if he couldnt speak normal and had to use a lot/all sign language then i would avoid him
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    How come it is seen as more acceptable to reject a girl or guy because you don't like their looks but it is not ok to reject them because they have say a disability/disease? (eg diabetes/multiple sclerosis). A lot of people are not attracted to me because I don't have an attractive face (which I can't change) so is it any worse rejecting someone who has an illness do you think? Its human nature to choose based on looks so isn't it human nature to choose an healthy mate?
    If it's enough to put you off, then it's fine.

    Other people may think it's wrong to not want to be with someone because of a disease/illness but at the end of the day it's your choice who you go out with or not. You shouldn't feel bad about who you do or do not want to be with, no matter what other people say. I don't think many people could argue with that unless you purposefully express your views in such a way that creates bad feeling, or if you were with someone and happy and then dumped them because they got ill.

    If you don't want them, you don't want them. It'd be much worse, imo, to go out with someone because you felt you had to, or because you felt sorry for them.
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    I think it's wrong to reject someone because of an illness, but if the illness contributes to you not being attracted to them then that's okay, if that makes sense...

    For example, I wouldn't automatically reject a guy with hearing problems, but if it was significantly difficult to communicate then I doubt we'd ever get anywhere anyway.
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    (Original post by insanetothebrain)
    Yeah mayn, if a wheelchair chick started getting flirty with me and ****, i'm afraid i'll have to push her down a steep hill or into traffic. :rip:
    failed attempt at being funny
    you think you're out of someone's league automatically just because they're in a wheelchair?
    urgh, you disgust me
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    Whichever person on here that says they dont care about any sort of illness or deformty is lying to themselves. That's the sad fact of reality.
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    (Original post by I Love Dog)
    Mental illness is perfectly good grounds to reject someone on unless it's being perfectly treated - I'd never date a bipolar person, for example. Diabetes no so much, my girlfriend is type 1 and it's really not a big deal as long as she takes care of herself.
    That is horrible, you obviously have no understanding of the illness. It cannot be helped.
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    (Original post by jackmileshunt)
    That is horrible, you obviously have no understanding of the illness. It cannot be helped.

    he never said it could be helped

    tbh seeing what my mams going through with bi-polar/depression i agree with him, i would never date someone who was going through that
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    (Original post by MancBoy)
    Whichever person on here that says they dont care about any sort of illness or deformty is lying to themselves. That's the sad fact of reality.
    V true.

    off topic but how did you get the little united symbol as your flag when you post mate? im part of the United Soc. but not sure how to do get the flag up.
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    (Original post by jackmileshunt)
    That is horrible, you obviously have no understanding of the illness. It cannot be helped.
    True. But being with a person who's mentally ill can be incredibly difficult, and they can make your life hard as well along the way. It's not unreasonable to not want to be with someone like that, or someone who you can't have a 100% normal relationship with all the time. I can see why someone wouldn't want to put up with everything that comes with it.
 
 
 
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