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    i emailed the person that i caught my boyfriend talking to on a dating website.

    i asked her what kind of way he initiated the conversation and what his screenname was, and whether she could let me know anything else he said to her. i want to know every aspect of how he spoke to other girls.


    The thing is, he had come clean after i caught him out, and he made me promise never to contact her.. he told me that it was all completely innocent, much like how we met (in a chatroom, and he was completely smut-free) but the fact is that he was still searching out girls to "talk" to.. and the emotional betrayal hurts just as much

    I just can't seem to move on from this, and whenever i mention that i'm finding it still hard, he says that there is no way we can be together unless i trust him 100% and stop doubting him.

    In a way i kind of hate him for turning me into an unsecure, needy and vulnerable mess. i realise that this is no fun to be around.

    Is it right that i emailed her? or do you think i should try harder to forget what i saw?

    How do i move on from this otherwise?

    any thoughts/help would be appreciated
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    The guy doesnt sound very nice, he's making it seem like it's your fault, not his. It's his fault by the sounds of things.

    To be honest you probably would've been better off confronting him first but he might have just lied so what other choice did you have?

    In all honesty, you either make sure he doesnt do anything like this ever again or dump him. I'd go for the latter
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    Yeah the guy seems a jerk. Considering he told you never to contact her again is very suspicious. I'd dump him as he's trying to turn this against you.
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    he's a nice guy and has been trying to make it up to me since..but there's always been this niggling doubt at the back of my mind.

    was it wrong to contact her when he specifically made me promise not to? ami just as bad?
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    I've come to terms that they want more than they actually have and they will always look :confused:

    But dont make him make it out and it is your fault
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    (Original post by discreetsunshine)
    he's a nice guy and has been trying to make it up to me since..but there's always been this niggling doubt at the back of my mind.

    was it wrong to contact her when he specifically made me promise not to? ami just as bad?
    I don't think so. I think he should be understanding about it if he truly cares, since its unfair on you, and you should be able to ease your mind about it. Telling you not to contact her suggests he has something to hide.
    There's no reason to have a problem with your boyfriend having female friends but a dating website isnt really a 'friends' sort of place.
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    Hmmmm, he only came clean after you caught him out. If there's nothing to hide why shouldn't you contact this girl? I'm afraid I'd be too suspicious to carry on this relationship.
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    i would end this, like sidi said if it was just normal chat then why did he make you promise not to contact her, i couldnt stay with someone that did this
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    You either have to forgive him and move on, or not, and end the relationship. It can't keep going half and half, and if he has stopped it is best to let sleeping dogs lie.
 
 
 
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