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How long would it take you to move in with someone? watch

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    i think it depends on the individual and the relationship.. and possibly the age as well..

    i was with my boyfriend for 5 months, then we split for 2 months, then got back together and a month later i moved in to his house.. i don't live there officially, i pay him rent though..

    discuss it with your boyfriend, explore your options and if you think it will work then do it..
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    It just depends on how fast you get to know someone. It can take a month or two - or many years. Ask yourself if you're happy with your partner being around, if you don't mind her weird behaviour you ignored (or even found 'cute') when not living with her, whether you argue and have fights, what would happen is there was a 'crisis', if you'd be comfortable with having much less personal space and if you could come to an agreement regarding this. Additionally, think of the pressure living together might bring.

    Personally, I would have moved in with my former girlfriend after a few months, we were considering it after six but her flatmate didn't move out in the end. Of course there'd have been problems, but they'd have been outweighed by the benefits, I believe.

    Very generally speaking, I'd say that the busier both of you are, the fewer problems will occur when moving in together. If you overcame the rose-coloured glasses stage and start thinking of long-term commitments, it's different, of course.
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    My boyfriend and I had been going out for around 15 months when we moved into our studio flat, and things couldn't be better

    You know when it's right, because you shouldn't be worrying about it.
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    More than a year i think. My ex had moved in with his girlfriend after only being with her for 4 months. needless to say a year later they split and it was very messy. I was talking to him the other day and he said things happened too soon. Not that it always ends up this way ofcourse, but i prefer taking things slowly.
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    But as i said, what if your boyfriend/girlfriend had been ditched by her/his flatmate - would you move in to help them out?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    But as i said, what if your boyfriend/girlfriend had been ditched by her/his flatmate - would you move in to help them out?
    No. It wouldn't make a difference to the situation for me. You need to put the long term health of your relationship before financial considerations, imo xx
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    A year or so?
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    (Original post by blinkbelle)
    No. It wouldn't make a difference to the situation for me. You need to put the long term health of your relationship before financial considerations, imo xx
    But what if they were going to be completely screwed?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    But what if they were going to be completely screwed?
    What do you mean 'completely screwed'? I would probs lend them some money to help with the rent if that was an issue, but it's still her mess and you don't want to put your relationship in jepordy for that - imo of course. xx
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    (Original post by blinkbelle)
    What do you mean 'completely screwed'? I would probs lend them some money to help with the rent if that was an issue, but it's still her mess and you don't want to put your relationship in jepordy for that - imo of course. xx

    As in, flatmate moved out and left her to pay the entire rent on her own... So either she moves out and quits her job and it get's really messy or you move in to help out...
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    As in, flatmate moved out and left her to pay the entire rent on her own... So either she moves out and quits her job and it get's really messy or you move in to help out...
    why doesn't she just move out and into somewhere else and not quit her job..... i dont understand why moving out would have to include quiting her job? i understand what you're saying and if you two want to live together anyway then yeah it could be a good solution but if its like 'well, if i HAVE to' then no its probably not a good idea.

    My and my bf started living together unofficially from the day we met/started going out (it was the same day) and basically he just never left my flat. we would go and stay at his dad's sometimes but mostly we lived at mine. after a while we got sick of my flat so moved into his dad's (which was so much comfier and there was always food there ) but still kept my flat going so when we went out etc we would stay at mine coz it was close to town. after 5 months my contract finished on the flat so i moved into his and a year later we moved to london together and live in a lovely 1 bed flat together. it always seemed natural to us, something that just happened rather than was planned. also we dont split money i just dont think i could do that it would seem totally bizarre. all our money goes into the same bank account anyway so there's no 'i paid for this, so you need to pay for this' whats the point? if you live together surely you just share everything?

    also i really dont get it how couples move in together but have seperate rooms? isn't that a waste of a room? do you actually sleep in seperate beds? that seems really weird to me.
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    I moved in with my boyfriend after 7 months.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    As in, flatmate moved out and left her to pay the entire rent on her own... So either she moves out and quits her job and it get's really messy or you move in to help out...
    also can i ask are you the boyfriend or the girlfriend in this story?
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    (Original post by Draculara)
    also can i ask are you the boyfriend or the girlfriend in this story?
    I want the perspectives of both.
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    (Original post by Draculara)
    why doesn't she just move out and into somewhere else and not quit her job..... i dont understand why moving out would have to include quiting her job?.
    Purely because the job is RIGHT next to her work so saves a lot on travel costs as it's in London. Moving somewhere else and spending money getting to work wouldn't be worth it as it's not brilliant pay but valuable experience on a CV.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    As in, flatmate moved out and left her to pay the entire rent on her own... So either she moves out and quits her job and it get's really messy or you move in to help out...
    It's her problem. Either she finds somewhere more suitable or finds another flatmate. It happens to people all the time :confused:
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    I'd like to wait 4-5 years before moving in together just because its the next phase of the relationship and I wouldn't want to rush. I'd like a couple of years renting with friends after uni before I moved in with my partner.
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    (Original post by ijustlovetolearn)
    I'd like to wait 4-5 years before moving in together just because its the next phase of the relationship and I wouldn't want to rush. I'd like a couple of years renting with friends after uni before I moved in with my partner.
    How long until you would get engaged to someone then? :eek:


    You learn a lot about someone by living with them. It's the only way of knowing whether they're the right person for you, I feel. Personally, I'd rather find that out sooner rather than later (but not so soon that you break up after a month, obviously).
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    (Original post by Draculara)
    also we dont split money i just dont think i could do that it would seem totally bizarre. all our money goes into the same bank account anyway so there's no 'i paid for this, so you need to pay for this' whats the point? if you live together surely you just share everything?

    also i really dont get it how couples move in together but have seperate rooms? isn't that a waste of a room? do you actually sleep in seperate beds? that seems really weird to me.
    Are you both earning about the same amount? Have you seriously talked about marriage, or forever? I admire your trust in each other and your relationship, but honestly for me, unless we were engaged or married, there's no way I'd share all my money with someone. It's too risky, and I don't have a safety net in terms of parents or siblings.

    As for the 2 rooms thing. You sleep in the same bed, but may occasionally want to do different stuff, ie. watching different TV shows, napping etc which you don't want the other person to be disturbed by. Essentially, I think a large bedroom with a lounge is sufficient, although bedrooms allow more privacy. I don't think couples who live together think of each bedroom as their own, just one is 'bed'room and one is a spare/study room or something
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    (Original post by Pink Bullets)
    How long until you would get engaged to someone then? :eek:


    You learn a lot about someone by living with them. It's the only way of knowing whether they're the right person for you, I feel. Personally, I'd rather find that out sooner rather than later (but not so soon that you break up after a month, obviously).
    I have no concerns about our relationship so I don't really need to test him. Were always spending nights at each others houses without any problems. Almost half a year now without even a serious bicker. So I don't see the need to rush anything and just enjoy each phase of the relationship as it comes, as you can only have it once.

    For me moving in together is a HUGE deal, as you might as well be engaged. I don't think i'd want to be engaged for a long time, maybe after a year of living together. Then get married in that same year. Then wait till 29-31 for children as then you're life as you know it is over .
 
 
 
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