Turn on thread page Beta

Distancing yourself from someone you were friends with watch

    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    How would you go about distancing yourself from someone who is/was your friend that you for whatever reason no longer want to be around any more? There are no real specifics to the situation, just a realization that the friend isn't the type of person I'd generally want to be around.
    Offline

    12
    ReputationRep:
    I'd just spend more time with people I did want to be friends with. There's no need to be rude, just don't initiate social activities. If you feel like that they probably do too and they'll get the hint.
    • #2
    #2

    Wow, my friend did that to me, she told me she wanted friends of her own race. I ******* hate her guts
    Offline

    10
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Wow, my friend did that to me, she told me she wanted friends of her own race. I ******* hate her guts
    Jeeez. So-called 'friend', ey.
    • #2
    #2

    (Original post by *theKid*)
    Jeeez. So-called 'friend', ey.
    It's even worse that I was "best" friends with her for seven years. Seven.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    Well, i'm not sure...if you don't tell ur friend why, it might leave her in miserable, full of questions and awkwardness. However if you can have better friends i guess it should be alright. Cause you can't really force yourself to be friends with someone you don't like.

    Sad enough...my good friend started to get further and further away from being friends with me ever since he got himself a girlfriend and now we are just like classmates, classmates that doesn't speak that often. I mean i am the only one like that..horrible..terrible friend...
    Offline

    10
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    It's even worse that I was "best" friends with her for seven years. Seven.
    Bloody hell. What the hell made her change her mind?
    • #3
    #3

    I know how you feel. They just don't take the hint. Your heading in different directions and want to leave them behind because their just not who you thought they were. I would just keep avoiding activities with them and slowly ignore them. I have been trying for years.
    • #2
    #2

    (Original post by *theKid*)
    Bloody hell. What the hell made her change her mind?
    I really don't know :dontknow: We were practically joint at the hip through high school and then we moved to sixth form and she claimed that she "needed friends of her own race" (I won't bate out the race LOL!) She just began to ignore me and acted like she never knew who I was...how can you do that? And why do you need a group of friends that are of the same race as you? I still don't understand :confused: :sad: I wasn't even a bad friend, I literally did everything for her - I've figured that she used me a lot! I'm over it now though
    Offline

    10
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I really don't know :dontknow: We were practically joint at the hip through high school and then we moved to sixth form and she claimed that she "needed friends of her own race" (I won't bate out the race LOL!) She just began to ignore me and acted like she never knew who I was...how can you do that? And why do you need a group of friends that are of the same race as you? I still don't understand :confused: :sad: I wasn't even a bad friend, I literally did everything for her - I've figured that she used me a lot! I'm over it now though
    Friends come and go, I suppose. It's good that you're over it, but hell, she sounds the biggest b**** ever.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    AWww,..im sure u can find better friends than her! GOod that you are over with her, she doesn't deserve such a good frd like you! i agree she sounds like a total bi***
    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    Don't be a coward. I think you owe it to your friend to explain why things aren't working out between the two of you and then to go from there.

    Ignoring someone is not cool. And I fully believe in "What goes around comes around"; there might be a friend who you're close to and like, what if they suddenely become distance with you, how would you feel?

    There must be a one main reason as to why you don't want to be friends with that specific person; whether it be their maturity- lack of, or something else and it's best to tackle it as opposed to running away.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    Just ignore them, it's simple tbh.

    Though maybe they deserve some kind of explanation :iiam:
    Offline

    16
    ReputationRep:
    boycott showers, deodorant. take up jogging.
    Offline

    14
    ReputationRep:
    Haha
    I have recently done this at my uni.
    A lot of people I knew and was getting to know were a bit off with her. They just didnt like her. She stuck to me on nights outs etc However I came to realise that I never saw her in the daytime as I could never be bothered to try to make conversation.
    In the short time I had known her she had pissed me off sooo many times that I just knew she wasnt worth it. Plus she never apologised
    Anyway I just stopped hanging out with her and since that has started happening I have met loads more people and generally having more fun

    However she has turned to making *****y comments about me which is pretty funny.
    • #4
    #4

    just ignore them, stop talking to them, simple as
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    It's even worse that I was "best" friends with her for seven years. Seven.
    :jumphug:
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    If it makes things more complicated, I'm probably their best friend but the person in question isn't mine. The four or five people that I do enjoy spending time with can't stand this one, who expects me to bring them along whenever I can to be with the rest of them. The one that nobody else likes at all isn't that bad and does well with the opposite sex, but a significant lack of friends on their part results in them asking me to do stuff that I don't want to do or go places I don't want to go with them. When I say no I feel bad about it and when I don't I feel bad about going. It's not as if you can just suddenly delete their phone number, msn account and facebook and pretend you never knew them so what can you realistically do?
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I really don't know :dontknow: We were practically joint at the hip through high school and then we moved to sixth form and she claimed that she "needed friends of her own race" (I won't bate out the race LOL!) She just began to ignore me and acted like she never knew who I was...how can you do that? And why do you need a group of friends that are of the same race as you? I still don't understand :confused: :sad: I wasn't even a bad friend, I literally did everything for her - I've figured that she used me a lot! I'm over it now though
    Oh wow that's actually ridiculous
    Good that you're over it now though (: it's her loss
    • #5
    #5

    Okay, so this is never a fun thing to have to do. But, when I was in your position I didn't ignore the person, just stopped putting much effort in to maintaining the friendship. Luckily for me there was a fair geographical distance between us at this time. I was still friendly enough, polite or whatever but gradually cut down contact completely.
    I was also one of the best friends this person had and I felt awful about the whole thing but it was necessary in the situation. The outcome: not heard from her personally in a long time but in some ways it appears to have given her a nudge to stand on her own two feet. She now has a boyfriend, job and social life of her own.
    Just do it carefully and with some sensitivity if the person really does rely on you.
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
Turn on thread page Beta
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: February 7, 2010
Poll
Which accompaniment is best?

The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

Write a reply...
Reply
Hide
Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.