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Mum throws out all my stuff - how to get her to stop watch

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    I'm 17, and my mum is very fussy about how she wants things in the house. "Nothing on show (practically) and everything in files in drawers" etc. I was in a rush yesterday morning finding my college planner and threw all my class sheets and notes in the air knowing my mum would have moved my planner because it was probably left on the side. When I came home from college that day I asked her if she could leave my stuff and that it would be tidy soon enough. I started putting sheets and stuff I didn't need in a bag to take to the bin, then went out (piano lesson, swimming, the usual) and had a pile of work to do so said I'd do it the next day, only to my surprise she had already taken my stuff and chucked all of it (including the stuff I needed) into the bin.
    When I'd asked her (calmly) where she'd put my stuff, she said she hadn't done anything and just put the bag of stuff I wanted to get rid of out, but after an hour of trying to find my AS Maths notes and instructions for my graphic calculator (that thing cost £38) I found them in the bin. :mad: I called her a liar (I was kinda annoyed) and just don't feel I can trust her. She did this to me last year chucking out some english and art c/w I had to start again.
    I'm not even a messy person, however I feel she's sometimes deliberately trying to wind me up. How can I get her to stop? I find it gets me more stressed over work. Now I have to ask my friends for their notes from maths since December...
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    Throw some of her important stuff out, see how she likes it.
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    (Original post by Rainbow-Dream)
    I'm 17, and my mum is very fussy about how she wants things in the house. "Nothing on show (practically) and everything in files in drawers" etc. I was in a rush yesterday morning finding my college planner and threw all my class sheets and notes in the air knowing my mum would have moved my planner because it was probably left on the side. When I came home from college that day I asked her if she could leave my stuff and that it would be tidy soon enough. I started putting sheets and stuff I didn't need in a bag to take to the bin, then went out (piano lesson, swimming, the usual) and had a pile of work to do so said I'd do it the next day, only to my surprise she had already taken my stuff and chucked all of it (including the stuff I needed) into the bin.
    When I'd asked her (calmly) where she'd put my stuff, she said she hadn't done anything and just put the bag of stuff I wanted to get rid of out, but after an hour of trying to find my AS Maths notes and instructions for my graphic calculator (that thing cost £38) I found them in the bin. :mad: I called her a liar (I was kinda annoyed) and just don't feel I can trust her. She did this to me last year chucking out some english and art c/w I had to start again.
    I'm not even a messy person, however I feel she's sometimes deliberately trying to wind me up. How can I get her to stop? I find it gets me more stressed over work. Now I have to ask my friends for their notes from maths since December...

    I think here is your problem.
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    (Original post by imhiya)
    I think here is your problem.
    How do you mean? :confused:
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    if she wants stuff put away then just put it away, its her house she can have it how she likes

    and dont listen to the immature person who said throw her important stuff out, that person needs to grow up
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    (Original post by Rainbow-Dream)
    How do you mean? :confused:
    Stop being messy and put your ******* stuff away.
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    get yer mates to ride her
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    Just keep everything in your room?

    Honestly, your mum sounds a bit tapped. She could have at least dumped all your stuff in your room rather than throw away things that are quite clearly not for the bin.
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    Could be merely fussy, could have something like OCD and feels compelled to deal with mess even if it means lying about it.

    Either way you're going to need to deal with it or move out.
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    (Original post by tinktinktinkerbell)
    if she wants stuff put away then just put it away, its her house she can have it how she likes

    and dont listen to the immature person who said throw her important stuff out, that person needs to grow up
    The thing was that I said I woud put the stuff away, and told her to leave it to me. And it's not her house, she doesn't contribute to the household income, and it's a rented house. She doesn't have a job or work. My dad does. She doesn't do house chores either really, we have a cleaner. So it's not realy "her" house...
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    (Original post by imhiya)
    Stop being messy and put your ******* stuff away.
    You are incredibly rude.
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    Kick her in the tits.
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    (Original post by Rainbow-Dream)
    The thing was that I said I woud put the stuff away, and told her to leave it to me. And it's not her house, she doesn't contribute to the household income, and it's a rented house. She doesn't have a job or work. My dad does. She doesn't do house chores either really, we have a cleaner. So it's not realy "her" house...
    shes married to your dad (im assuming) so yes it is her house

    and it doesnt matter if you said you would do it later, if she doesnt want stuff left out she doesnt want it left out, simple as that

    so in future either tidy it away there and then or face having it binned
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    Take your Mum to see a shrink.
    Just to clear it up, you are certain she is lying and she's not telling the truth and yor Dad and the cleaner are throwing it away right?
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    (Original post by tinktinktinkerbell)
    shes married to your dad (im assuming) so yes it is her house

    and it doesnt matter if you said you would do it later, if she doesnt want stuff left out she doesnt want it left out, simple as that

    so in future either tidy it away there and then or face having it binned
    Separated from my dad. They never got on. The fact is I'd already started tidying it away but hadn't had time as I had a piano lesson then swimming. I couldn't miss that just to tidy my room. You should try to actually read the thread description before you comment... :rolleyes:
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    (Original post by Charlottielottie)
    Take your Mum to see a shrink.
    Just to clear it up, you are certain she is lying and she's not telling the truth and yor Dad and the cleaner are throwing it away right?
    Nope I'm sure. Afterwards she backtracked on what she had said and said that if I had tidied it earlier she wouldn't have chucked it out. Which is when I got annoyed and called her a liar, esp. as I'd spent the past hour looking for my stuff. I had already started tidying it away anyway. Ironically, my parents separated because my dad thought my mum was a liar.
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    (Original post by Rainbow-Dream)
    Separated from my dad. They never got on. The fact is I'd already started tidying it away but hadn't had time as I had a piano lesson then swimming. I couldn't miss that just to tidy my room. You should try to actually read the thread description before you comment... :rolleyes:

    i did read the thread and my opinion still stands, you should have put it away, it takes less than 1 min to walk (or run) to your room and put it in a draw, you would hardly have had to miss your lesson

    stop being a brat and follow the house rules or move out
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    I already told you.She needs a good shag. get yer mates to sort her out
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    (Original post by Rainbow-Dream)
    Nope I'm sure. Afterwards she backtracked on what she had said and said that if I had tidied it earlier she wouldn't have chucked it out. Which is when I got annoyed and called her a liar, esp. as I'd spent the past hour looking for my stuff. I had already started tidying it away anyway. Ironically, my parents separated because my dad thought my mum was a liar.
    I know everyone is posting telling you to tidy up, and I'm sure you do make an effort, but maliciously throwing away something you KNOW someone NEEDS, knowing that they have a more complicated, busy life than you do is incredibly disrespectful. Go live with your Dad. Or just threaten to and hope it all comes out in the wash.
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    Jeeze, tinkerbell, you're being a bit high and mighty aren't ya.

    It can't take her mother 2 seconds to realise it's a piece of work or something important and NOT throw it away...
 
 
 
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