Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free
x Turn on thread page Beta

Problems Coming out. watch

Announcements
    Offline

    1
    Here's links
    http://www.avert.org/gay-lesbian.htm
    http://www.channel4.com/health/micro...ind/index.html
    www.akt.org.uk
    www.outproud.org/brochure_coming_out.html
    http://www.likeitis.org.uk
    http://teenadvice.about.com/
    www.fflag.org.uk
    http://www.thinkb4youspeak.com/
    http://www.gayyouthuk.net/
    http://www.need2know.co.uk
    http://www.llgs.org.uk/
    http://www.outproud.org/
    http://kidshealth.org/teen/
    http://www.teenissues.co.uk/
    http://www.queeryouth.org.uk
    http://www.divamag.co.uk/diva/features.asp?AID=1678
    http://www.gayyouth.org.uk/
    http://www.direct.gov.uk/
    http://www.covenanthouse.org
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    Its also a shame that people still feel the need to label themselves and other people. If someone likes guys and gals and wants to describe themselves as gay/straight/something else, its noone elses business to say no you're not, you're bi/straight/gay/whatever.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    Yeah I've never thought of that, the fact that everyone is expected to be straight and those who are not in that category have to come out and say that they're different.
    I just don't want to label myself as 'Gay' because that implies that I only love other guys and that I will do for the rest of my life.
    I'd prefer to label myself as 'whatever'.
    I get attracted to the guy/girl who gives me butterflies when I see them
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    I don't think labels are such a bad thing to be honest! Words are just symbols for something that is in existence and if using the word gay, straight or bi helps us communicate what we are to one another then that's fine but when there is a negative stigma attached to certain words then it becomes a problem! It often leads to people having to accept themselves as if some external force has taken control of them and they have to get used it it! That sucks!

    (Original post by bumbleboy)
    .....the old saying the people who mind dont matter and the people who matter dont mind rings true.
    Couldn't have put it better myself!!
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by rv10)
    Whenever something comes up about Homosexuals in my family, someone normally says somthing homophobic, I just stay silent and try and blend into the background. Its really awkward.
    Then the chances are, your family already know, or suspect.

    There's no point getting dramatic about things like this... why is it a big deal in 2010?
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by innerhollow)
    My friends are hardly any better. I mean, most are straight A-students who memorise hundreds of pages of notes for each subject, and yet when you ask them to think for one second about homosexuality, they can't do it. If I bring up homosexuality in a conversation, they all go silent, and you can see that vacuous, unintelligible look on each one of their faces. That moment is comparable to trying to explain nuclear physics to illiterates. Just shows you the failings of the education system, when so many of the so-called "best and brightest" actually have a tiny scope for rational thought.
    It just shows how far we have declined from being able to think clearly and logically to being able to memorise other people's opinions and use them as our own! I sympathise with anyone in this situation!
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    I don't know when I'll come out but probably when I get into a relationship.
    As one of you suggested I might test the water by coming out here at university, but I might also just try and subtly show my sexuality at home (somehow) just to soften the 'landing' when I do come out.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    This sounds like a bit of an odd question but where would I find a boyfriend? I'm a bit unfamiliar with the gay scene, I was thinking of going to London Gay Pride but that's all the way in July.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    are there any gay clubs or gay nights near you? otherwise just at normal everyday things you might find someone? it depends really. are you at university? if you are they probably have an lgbt group. coming out to parents is difficult, and i only came out to mine as bi when i got a girlfriend (i think i'm something along the lines of 70% gay 30% straight, but i don't really worry about it tbh). it was difficult for a few days, and is still slightly awkward now (came out at xmas) but they are becoming much more understanding and nice now, and i feel much better for telling them. only you can judge what your families reaction would be, but chances are they will be more understanding than you think. Don't feel pressured into talking to them though, and i'd recommend being sure of what you are feeling before you do, as it is likely that they will have a lot of questions (going off personal experience)!
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by lostandconfused0001)
    (i think i'm something along the lines of 70% gay 30% straight, but i don't really worry about it tbh)
    I'm about the same.
    How did you come out as Bi? Did you just say "I'm Bisexual", because if I said that to my parents they probably wouldn't understand that as much as me saying "I'm Gay".
    There are gay clubs and bars near me as I'm in London, but I don't have anyone to go with, I have thought about going on my own a few times though but I sort of want to meet other guys my own age.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    basically! my mum was asking me why i hadn't got a boyfriend yet and i just bit the bullet and told her i had a girlfriend. she was a bit shocked and asked me if i 'was going through some wierd phase' and i told her i was bi. she was a bit shocked but she was ok really, she didn't say anything nasty anyway!
    you could just try going by yourself once, see if you like it and you could meet someone else your age! you won't know until you try. my dad said he suspected anyway when i told him, i had been hinting a bit at home by telling them off whenever they made a homophobic remark and i'd always stay stuff like "she's gorgeous" if there was someone hot on tv. maybe you could try little things like that?
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    Well they don't know that I'm gay yet let alone bi.
    I'm mainly attracted to guys but there are some girls. I think I'll hint at the fact I'm gay before I come out as bi.
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
Turn on thread page Beta
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: February 10, 2010
Poll
Do you agree with the proposed ban on plastic straws and cotton buds?

The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

Write a reply...
Reply
Hide
Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.