This isn't a "I hate my brother !, I'm overreacting and I'll cooldown later thread" this is that I really really despise him.
I mean this isn't childish sibling bickering (I'm 19 he's 23), even though he used to be horrible to me when I was little. I'm the youngest of 3 brothers, the one I'm referring to is the middle child.
Now what's so bad about him ?
Well, he is generally quite nice to most people, as long as they don't say the slightest negative thing about him, he seems very insecure, so he just lashes out at the slightest negative thing.
Extremely argumentative, towards anyone who disagrees with him, can't let the little things go etc.. Even my mum says how much it pains her to see him shouting at my dad, in a very loud obnoxious disrespecting manner..
I mean even if my dad is wrong, there's no need to continually shout at him, because this is the bloke who migrated to this country 40 years ago and has been working from early morning to late at night, putting food on the table, and clothes on our back etc...
All he does is ask for money, and he usually gets it eventually because my parents cave in, despite me and my oldest brother telling them not to.
He's not on any great speaking terms with my oldest brother, since they used to fight and argue a lot as kids. And recently I've started to show him the cold shoulder because its just too much hard work, and after I told him to stop arguing with my mum, he started berating me. I get on with my oldest brother, great.
Even the small things annoy me. He just sits in front of a television from morning to night, and sometimes when you ask to watch something he says that he wants to watch something in 20 minutes or so... We've all tried talking back to him, explaining that he's being unreasonable but he just constantly argues.
I know the duty is on my parents behalf, but it seems like they've thrown in the towell. So I'm wondering what I can do personally ?
I mean I have to live with this guy for, x more years, and its difficult to reason with him, unless he's going to get his way in some form, and he doesn't lose face.
My opinion of him is that he is a very insecure person, about his looks and about a lot of things in his life. When he talks, he always feels like he's getting the hard end of the deal, when in reality he's getting a lot of privileges, that other people could only wish for. I've never heard him apologize for the things he said, to my parents,brother or me.
Because of his insecurities he lashes out, at those around him. I'm not sure about what it's like to be the middle child, but I remember a quite a few years ago he complained that he felt somewhat forgotten. So those feelings may exacerbate his supposed insecurities
To sum up, above are my thoughts on him, and I'm at my wits end. These feelings aren't a spur of the moment thing, this is how I've felt about him for many years now, but I've tried to be as nice as possible, and it would make me very happy to never see him again, if only that could happen.
Turn on thread page Beta
I hate my brother !! watch
- Thread Starter
- 06-02-2010 19:48
- 06-02-2010 20:02
There seems to be something affecting his confidence, which you've highlighted - where could it be from?
Has he lost a girlfriend recently? Can he not get a girlfriend?
Or perhaps more rudimentary, does he find it hard to make friends?
Maybe he doesn't really feel forgotten, maybe he just feels lonely - I know I'd feel lonely if I watched TV all day, and started to notice even my family weren't having a lot to do with me any more.
- 06-02-2010 21:32
All i know is that if ever spoke to my parents like that my dad would have smacked me one considering he's from india and worked hard all his life just to provide for me and my family.
All i can say is that maybe you need to tell him some home truths, that he's not got it hard or better yet just give up on him totally, tell him 'we've all had enough we don't care what you do'. Sounds tough I know but that way he'll know he'll have to change.